Shoutout to nyanmaru for the commission!
Sun Xiangyang, heavily intoxicated, belched and laughed crookedly, “Yes, he said exactly that. Haha, why the fierce expression? Are you planning to hit me?”
Ye Mu swallowed hard, his eyes dark and deep, standing there without replying.
Sun Xiangyang, undeterred by the lack of response, leisurely picked up a glass of whiskey and took a swig. “What’s the matter? Don’t you believe me? I’ll tell you again, Chen Mo doesn’t have any genuine intentions! Look at how foolishly you throw yourself at others. It’s even embarrassing to watch!”
Ye Mu stared intently at him, his gaunt face shadowed, and said through clenched teeth, “You’re drunk.”
Sun Xiangyang laughed, “Whether I’m drunk or not doesn’t matter. At least I’m willing to stake my life on it. You’re like a duck being exploited.”
Upon hearing this, Ye Mu’s face darkened. Ignoring the situation, he suddenly clenched his fist and grabbed Sun Xiangyang’s collar.
Sun Xiangyang, struggling to breathe, gasped for air instinctively.
People nearby were startled and quickly intervened, trying to separate them.
“Alright, he’s drunk. Take your anger out somewhere else. Don’t cause a scene here!”
“We were just joking. Don’t take it seriously.”
“Yes, Sun Xiangyang is unreliable. Don’t let him get to you.”
“That’s right, those words certainly weren’t from Chen Mo himself.”
Sun Xiangyang slumped onto the sofa, stubbornly defending himself. “No, no, it wasn’t slander. I heard Chen Mo himself say he wanted to get with someone. If you don’t believe me, go ask him. I swear, I’m speaking the truth.”
“Ugh!” Someone couldn’t help but use a microphone to silence him. “Alright, stop talking!”
Sun Xiangyang, still drunk and shouting, protested, “Why can’t I say it? You were all so eager before. Keep going, come on, let’s bet on when my buddy will ditch that gay!”
The surrounding people were frightened and directly pressed down on his shoulders, forcing him to sit still. “D*mn it, settle down.”
Sun Xiangyang grumbled and resisted, but was eventually held down.
One person stepped in to mediate, “Ye Mu, right? Let’s leave it at that for today. I apologize on behalf of my friend. Don’t take it to heart.”
Ye Mu said nothing, casting a dark glance at the incoherent Sun Xiangyang before paying and leaving.
Walking home from the bar, although he appeared calm and composed, he couldn’t suppress his inner turmoil.
He didn’t fully believe the words of a drunk person, but they felt like a thorn in his heart, causing suffocating pain whenever he thought about it.
In winter, with the temperature dropping below freezing, his fingers were numb by the time he got home.
After ringing the doorbell for a while with no response, Ye Mu struggled to move his fingertips, finally managing to retrieve his key from his pocket and insert it into the lock.
He opened the door and found that Chen Mo had already returned ahead of him. Chen Mo was hunched over, leaning against the railing of the balcony, smoking a cigarette.
The young man’s back was still broad, but there was a heavy sense of worry about him.
Ye Mu took a deep breath, slipped on his shoes, and slowly walked over to him, reaching out to take the cigarette from his mouth.
There was a sharp “smack!”
Chen Mo reflexively slapped his hand away.
The force was so strong that red marks appeared on the backs of both their hands, stinging with pain.
Ye Mu was slightly startled, his gaze trembling as he looked at Chen Mo for a long time without moving.
Chen Mo pursed his lips, turned his head away, and refused to look at him, his whole demeanor serious and distant.
Ye Mu remained silent, lowering his thin eyelids as he rasped out, “Give me one.”
Chen Mo’s profile was sharp as a knife, and he remained expressionless, not moving at all, clearly showing no intention of acknowledging him.
Ye Mu’s expression was indifferent. He silently reached over to take the pack of cigarettes from him, pulled one out, and said, “Lighter.”
Chen Mo, with a cigarette half-clenched in his mouth, kept a stiff expression, as if he hadn’t heard.
Ye Mu searched his pockets himself, found the lighter, and lit the cigarette, slowly taking a drag.
He smoked with a calm demeanor. The colorful night lights outside reflected on his handsome features, giving him a unique aura of someone who had been tempered by time.
After finishing one cigarette, he lowered his head, took the pack from Chen Mo again, and with his slender fingers, pulled out another cigarette, lit it, and started smoking once more.
The pungent smoke lingered in his lungs before he slowly exhaled it like a gentle stream, the curling smoke adding a touch of melancholy to his appearance.
“Got something on your mind?” After a long silence, Ye Mu finally spoke first.
Chen Mo’s face, as pale as jade, was cold. He continued smoking without wanting to respond.
Ye Mu pursed his dry lips, took another deep drag on his cigarette, and stopped pampering him. “Say it. If I can help you solve it, all the better.”
Chen Mo remained silent, his eyes lowered, his pupils deep as bottomless pits as he quietly stared at the night scene below the balcony. “If it were that easy, I wouldn’t be so troubled.”
Ye Mu looked down at the glowing tip of his cigarette. “It’s still better than keeping it bottled up inside.”
Chen Mo still didn’t speak, indifferent as he continued smoking, the swirling white smoke obscuring his handsome features, making it impossible to tell what he was thinking.
Ye Mu stared straight into the distance. “Does what you told me that night still count?”
His question was met with nothing but cold, empty air.
Though the two of them stood side by side with their arms almost touching, there was no communication between them, and the atmosphere was as silent as death.
Ye Mu glanced at him, his lips curving into a grim smile as he said firmly, “Speak.”
Chen Mo stared at the darkness, his thin lips parting slightly. “I don’t know if we should continue.”
Ye Mu tugged at the corner of his lips and suddenly laughed.
That laugh was laced with bitterness, sarcasm, and self-mockery.
If possible, he had really hoped the other man would firmly repeat what he’d said before.
But just that simple sentence, “I don’t know,” shattered his hopes and pushed him into an abyss.
It turned out that everything was just his wishful thinking. He had thought the other man loved him dearly, but in the end, it was all for nothing. Chen Mo couldn’t even give him a clear answer on whether they should stay together. Was he so tired of him that he didn’t even bother to lie anymore?
How sad and laughable.
His heart bled as if it had been slashed by a knife, tearing open a wound that was just about to heal.
What he could be thankful for was that, although his eyes were filled with inexpressible sorrow, he still didn’t cry. He just stood there quietly, smoking one cigarette after another.
The ground was covered with ash, and cigarette butts piled up like a small mountain.
The whole pack of cigarettes was nearly gone.
Chen Mo took out the last one, lit it, and took a deep drag, holding the smoke in for a long time before finally exhaling. Then, in a low, unexpected voice, he said, “I had someone look into what happened back then today.”
Ye Mu lowered his lashes, his eyes narrowing from the smoke. “And?”
Chen Mo slowly stubbed out the cigarette, his gaze turning cold and dark as he spoke through tight lips. “Ye Mu, you’re really despicable.”
There was a tearing pain in his throat as Ye Mu stood up, wiping his face. His expression was lonely, and he smiled bitterly. “It’s good that you found out. I’ve been hiding it for a long time.”
Chen Mo’s eyes were dark and heavy, his throat moving with difficulty. “If it hadn’t been uncovered today, were you planning to hide it for the rest of your life? Knowing how much I hated that person, knowing how much I despised what happened back then?”
Ye Mu’s gaze dimmed. “Just consider me selfish.”
Chen Mo’s eyes stung slightly as he said, “Before this, I never imagined you could be like this.”
Ye Mu stood there, closing his eyes, his lips curving into an ugly smile. “You just didn’t see it clearly. I’ve always been someone with a dark past.”
Chen Mo sniffed, “You know, I was only thirteen at the time, just brought from foster care, alone and helpless, and then thrown into that juvenile detention center, living like a trained animal. I even thought about dying back then.”
Ye Mu raised his hand to wipe his face and sincerely said, “I’m sorry.”
Chen Mo’s features were steeped in shadows as he paused briefly before saying, “After what you did to me, you really should apologize.”
Ye Mu replied quietly, “I’ll do my best to help you with the company. Consider it my way of making amends.”
Chen Mo lowered his eyes. “No need. After what you did, I wouldn’t dare trust you again.”
Ye Mu looked blankly ahead, his eyes devoid of light. “Do as you wish. The company is yours. It’s only right for you to decide.”
Chen Mo didn’t respond, just maintained his posture as the winter wind blew through his disheveled black hair, covering half of his face and making him look deep and somber.
After several hours, he pursed his thin lips and, under the dim night light, his chiseled face showed hesitation. “Ye Mu, even though you’re that person, I still feel hatred when I think about those things.”
Ye Mu laughed, a bitter, weary smile, trying to sound nonchalant. “Then let’s break up.”
He was tired of this childish love game and didn’t want to continue deceiving himself.
There shouldn’t have been any other emotions between two men in the first place.
He hadn’t thought so before, but now even he found it absurd and disgusting.
