Chapter 5 Conditions
The streets at six in the morning were still quiet, with only a few office workers standing at the bus stop, waiting for their ride. Students, carrying backpacks, crowded around a breakfast stall, taking their soy milk and steamed buns, ready to head to school. The ground, wet from last night’s rain, had already dried, and the warm sunlight bathed everything in a pleasant glow. It was a clear day.
In contrast to the bustle of the previous night, the doors of Yanluo Bar were tightly shut, its usual liveliness absent, leaving it eerily quiet and deserted.
Any place bearing the name “Yanluo” had a protective barrier set up by King Yan himself. When the bar closed, no one could use their spiritual power to pass through the walls. Even the Black and White Impermanence were blocked outside.
Without hesitation, Fan Wujiu took out his phone and made a call. “Granny Meng, are you awake? Come down and open the door.”
The bar’s owner was Granny Meng, a woman sent by King Yan to manage the place. Her real name was Meng Wan, and she appeared young and delicate. But most people simply called her Granny Meng, a nickname that had spread due to rumors, painting her as an old woman. Despite Meng Wan’s multiple attempts to clear up the misunderstanding, she couldn’t change the deep-rooted image in the public’s mind.
There was little she could do about it, though. Just like Xie Bian and Fan Wujiu, people preferred to call them Heibai Wuchang, or simply the Seventh and Eighth Masters, forgetting their real names entirely.
They were old colleagues, having known each other for centuries, so their relationship was far too familiar for any formalities. Fan Wujiu spoke casually, as if he were at home.
On the other end of the line, Granny Meng picked up the phone. Fan Wujiu switched it to speaker, and a woman’s annoyed voice came through, scolding him. “Hei Wuchang, why are you disturbing my sleep so early? Who opens a bar at this hour? Are you rushing to be reincarnated? Come back for a drink at night, not in the morning! I’m hanging up!”
Xie Bian spoke calmly, “Miss Meng.”
There was a brief silence on the other end. Meng Wan hadn’t quite hung up yet.
Not only did she fail to hang up the phone, but her tone softened immediately. “Ah, Bai Wuchang is also here? I’m sorry about earlier. I’ll come down and open the door for you now. Why didn’t that surnamed Hei mention he was with you?” She really didn’t want to lose face in front of Bai Wuchang.
Fan Wujiu blinked in confusion. “???” She’d started ranting as soon as she picked up the phone, what was he supposed to say? And why such a different treatment? Also, his surname was Fan!
If Meng Wan had known what Fan Wujiu was thinking, she would probably have rolled her eyes. One of them was a man of straight iron and steel who called her “Granny Meng,” while the other was a gentle, refined gentleman who addressed her as “Miss Meng.” Anyone would treat them differently.
In just three minutes, Meng Wan appeared downstairs, looking perfectly put together, and opened the door for them. She focused her attention entirely on Xie Bian. “Well, well, what a rare guest. What brings Bai Wuchang here today?”
Bai Wuchang was well-liked in the underworld. Although he seemed like an aloof, untouchable figure, he was actually kind and thoughtful. Who wouldn’t like a god like him?
Xie Bian replied, “I need to find the beautiful god who was here last night. Is he still staying at the bar?”
“He’s upstairs,” Meng Wan replied. “Is there something you need from him? I can take you upstairs, but whether he sees you is up to him. After all, he’s a major god, and I can’t just decide that on my own.” She started to lead Xie Bian inside and toward the stairs.
Fan Wujiu, sounding a bit cold, said, “Are you really going to treat me like air?”
Meng Wan glanced back at him, crossing her arms. “Oh, right, I remember now. You still owe me a glass of juice, don’t you? Did you bring the money?”
Xie Bian shot him a surprised look, as if silently asking: You still haven’t paid?
Fan Wujiu: “……” At this point, he would have preferred to be invisible rather than risk embarrassing himself in front of Lao Bai.
“How much?” Xie Bian asked. “I’ll pay for him.”
Meng Wan waved her hand. “It’s rare for Bai Wuchang to come by, so I won’t take your money. Consider the juice a gift for him.”
She walked to the innermost room on the second floor and knocked lightly on the door. “There’s someone here to see you.”
Inside, there was no response.
“Is he still asleep?” Meng Wan muttered to herself, then raised her voice. “Guest, there are two people outside who want to see you. Will you meet them?”
This time, a voice came from inside, cautious and measured.
“Two people? Who are they?”
Xie Bian answered, “The Eastern soul collectors, the Black and White Impermanence.”
There was a brief silence, followed by the sound of footsteps approaching. Then, the door swung open.
A foreign god with fair skin and beautiful appearance came into view. Beneath thick lashes, his emerald-green eyes sparkled. Soft golden curls cascaded down his shoulders. He was wearing an oversized shirt that hung loosely, almost to his thighs, exposing his long, smooth, white legs. He looked radiant and languid, both innocent and seductive, his bare feet pressing softly against the carpet. Every inch of him exuded a mature, captivating charm.
A natural-born beauty.
Even those who claimed to be indifferent to beauty would lose themselves for a moment in the presence of such stunning looks.
Venus appraised his two unexpected visitors, his gaze lingering on Fan Wujiu. “Oh? Aren’t you the one from last night, the poor guy who couldn’t even pay for a glass of juice?”
Fan Wujiu: “……” Please, let this joke pass already.
Xie Bian, feigning ignorance, asked, “Do you two know each other?”
“Not really,” Venus chuckled lightly. “I was penniless and tried to borrow money from this gentleman, only to find out he’s even poorer than I am. Are you his lover? If you are, then I can understand why he was so indifferent to me. He must be a very loyal partner.”
Xie Bian froze for a moment, the last trace of unhappiness from the previous night fading away, replaced by a flicker of amusement.
So it really was just a misunderstanding.
“No,” he said, “we’re friends.”
“Friends?” Venus exclaimed, covering his lips in surprise. “But I clearly……” clearly smell the scent of love from you both. Not an intense passion, so it’s not the honeymoon phase, but a gentle, enduring kind of love, like a long stream of water. It is innocent and sincere, and painfully suppressed……
Secret love.
As the God of Love, Venus had the sharpest instincts when it came to matters of the heart. He could immediately see that these two shared a mutual, unspoken affection for each other. It amused him, but he had no intention of pointing it out. After all, they were strangers he had only just met, and some things were better left unsaid.
He shifted the topic. “So, what do you need from me? Oh, standing at the door isn’t convenient. Come inside and we can talk.”
Inside the room, Venus looked at the open book before him, Evolution of Chinese Clothing through the Dynasties, his expression a mixture of confusion and disbelief.
“You want me…… to read this book and then write a ten-thousand-word review?” Venus asked incredulously.
This world must have gone mad.
Countless men had sought Venus out before, not just to enjoy a fleeting affair, but also to angrily accuse him of being fickle or to tearfully beg for reconciliation. Venus had never cared. As the God of Love and Pleasure, he followed his own desires. What was wrong with that? But love? Sorry, although he could see and bless others’ love, he had never experienced it himself. His beautiful, shimmering, emerald eyes had never reflected anyone’s image. His full, crimson lips had kissed many men, but never once had he spoken of love to any of them.
He had heard every kind of flattery and smooth talk, but this was the first time someone asked him for something so pure. It made him question if his ears were playing tricks on him, or perhaps his Chinese wasn’t good enough, and he had misunderstood.
How could this be? Someone had come all this way just to ask him to read a book and write a review. The world truly was full of surprises.
Although Venus had heard that Eastern gods were more reserved and introverted, unlike the passionate and fiery nature of Western gods, this situation still left him stunned.
The academic atmosphere in the East was truly overwhelming.
Fan Wujiu nodded. “Yes, the purpose of our trip is to ask you for this favor.”
Venus, who had been slightly offended by the man’s indifference the night before, was not going to be polite. He lazily reclined on the sofa. “But why should I help with this?”
Fan Wujiu found himself momentarily at a loss. After all, Venus really had no obligation to help them.
Xie Bian, however, remained calm and spoke up. “Do you know the meaning of ‘Huaxia’?”
Venus raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”
“Huaxia [ancient China] is the country of proper attire, the land of rites and propriety. The beauty of clothing is called ‘hua,’ and the great customs are called ‘xia,'” Xie Bian explained. “As the God of Beauty, I’m sure you would be interested in studying the aesthetics of Eastern clothing.” [T/N: Huaxia” (华夏) is a historical and cultural term that refers to the ancient civilization that eventually formed the foundation of what is now China.]
Fan Wujiu silently admired Xie Bian for his quick wit and eloquence.
Venus seemed to contemplate this for a moment. “I do have an interest in beautiful garments,” he admitted. “I might look through this book, but writing a ten-thousand-word review sounds like quite a hassle. I have a condition, though.”
Fan Wujiu asked, “What condition?”
“To be honest,” Venus said, his tone heavy with reluctance, “there’s a pervert who’s been hunting me down across the world, and he’s pretty powerful. I can’t beat him.” His expression darkened as he seemed unwilling to recall the unpleasant details about the man. “I need a place where I can be absolutely safe.”
Even though he was penniless when he escaped, he could easily charm countless people into spending money on him, ensuring he wouldn’t lack for a place to stay. But he hadn’t chosen that route.
Simply finding a place to stay wasn’t enough. He needed security. He absolutely couldn’t be found and captured again by that pervert, to be imprisoned at the bottom of the sea for another few hundred years. And since he had already escaped once, the pervert’s obsession with him had only intensified.
Xie Bian understood immediately.
It wasn’t hard to guess. From Venus’ apparent disarray the previous day, to the caution he displayed when dealing with visitors earlier, it was clear that this stunningly beautiful god was hiding from an enemy.
Out of caution, Xie Bian asked, “How strong is he?” If it was someone they couldn’t afford to offend, perhaps they should consider asking another Western god.
Venus thought for a moment. “Probably at the level of a divine king.”
Fan Wujiu was startled. “You didn’t offend Zeus, did you?”
Venus paused. “……Close enough.” It wasn’t the one who ruled the skies, but rather the one who ruled the seas.
“Our King Yan is also a divine king,” Xie Bian said calmly. “It’s no problem. You can stay in our apartment. In fact, the remaining rooms there are all empty.”
After all, King Yan was the ruler of his domain, no less powerful than the kings of other divine realms.
With throbbing temples, Fan Wujiu leaned in to speak quietly to Xie Bian. “Aren’t you worried that this might cause trouble for His Majesty? What if he gets angry?”
“Why worry?” Xie Bian replied nonchalantly. “Hasn’t His Majesty always wanted cultural exchange? If that foreign divine king comes knocking, King Yan will be thrilled to sit down and have a chat.”
Fan Wujiu: “……”
Well, Lao Bai wasn’t just gentle. He was also quite scheming. This had to be a form of revenge for the night they had spent copying books for His Majesty.
“That’s great,” Venus breathed a sigh of relief, then asked, “By the way, do you charge rent for your apartment?”
Fan Wujiu answered, “The monthly rent is 100,000 underworld coins.”
Venus suddenly stuttered. “I forgot to mention, your language is really hard. My Chinese is only good enough for basic communication, and I don’t recognize many Chinese characters. This book has so many obscure words, so reading it will be difficult for me. It might take a long time, and I can only write the review in Latin or Greek……”
Xie Bian said, “I can cover the rent for you.”
Venus immediately became fluent again. “I’ll become an expert in the Chinese language right away!”
Fan Wujiu’s eyelid twitched. He’d just witnessed how money could solve everything.
“Also,” Venus added, “there are two of us. But we’ll share one room, so the rent shouldn’t be doubled, right? Although I’m not the one paying, I don’t want to make you spend too much.”
“Two?” Fan Wujiu looked around. “Who else is with you?”
Venus snapped his fingers. “Cupid, come out.”
At the sound of the snap, a little boy appeared in front of them. A small halo hovered above his head, delicate wings fluttered on his back, and in his hands, he held a tiny bow and arrow. With his golden hair and blue eyes, he looked like a delicate porcelain doll.
The little boy fluttered his tiny wings in mid-air, clutching the bow and arrow in his pudgy hands. In a high-pitched, slightly awkward voice, he greeted them in broken Chinese. “Hello!”
Venus smiled and introduced, “This is my son, Cupid, the little God of Love.”
If you enjoy this novel, support the Translator ginevre on her ko-fi account :))
