Everyone Is Non-Human Except Me [Rebirth] Chapter 51

Even though Wei Huan said he wouldn’t leave that night, he was still a little uneasy inside. If he stayed, where would he sleep? On the floor again? Or on the bed?

No, no, no. Sleeping in the same bed would be kind of weird.

But why would it be weird?

His mind was a complete mess, as if two little versions of himself had crawled inside his head— One kept saying: You can’t do that! How can you sleep in the same bed as Yun Yongzhou?

That’s so strange!

The other argued back: Why not? You’re both men, what’s there to be afraid of? Totally innocent, nothing shady at all.

So noisy.

Wei Huan gave up on thinking about it. He saw Yun Yongzhou sitting on another sofa, taking a book out from under the coffee table. It was already this day and age, where technology had made entertainment richer than ever, but Yun Yongzhou was like someone from centuries ago, still preferring thick, physical books, quietly flipping through page by page.

If it were someone else, Wei Huan would have thought it was weird, but because it was Yun Yongzhou, he didn’t find it strange at all.

This double standard seemed to apply perfectly whenever it came to him.

The little furball once again jumped onto his lap, this time with a tiny pouch strapped to its back. Wei Huan found it amusing and poked it with his finger. “You don’t even have arms or legs—how did you manage to put this bag on?”

The little furball let out a furious “Ying!” Wei Huan instinctively pressed his index finger to his lips and snuck a glance at Yun Yongzhou, who had slightly lifted his gaze to look at him. Wei Huan awkwardly smiled and quickly stood up with the furball in his arms. “I won’t bother you while you’re reading. I’m gonna go to the bedroom and give this little guy a good talking to.” 

As soon as he finished speaking, he dashed into the bedroom with the furball and shut the door.

“You seriously have way too much going on every single day.” Wei Huan tossed the little furball onto the bed. “You’re not some furball spirit, you’re a trouble-making spirit.”

Though the little furball was annoyed, it still stubbornly bounced onto Wei Huan’s knee and started shaking something out from the tiny pouch on its back, spilling it onto Wei Huan.

It was a thin black strip.

“I haven’t even finished checking out all the weird stuff you pulled out last time—what’s this now?” Wei Huan picked up the black strip and rubbed it a little. Black powder came off onto his fingers—it looked like the burnt remains of a lamp wick.

Who would’ve thought that just by rubbing it, the wick would suddenly twist, grow longer, and turn redder and redder. It slipped out of Wei Huan’s hand, fell onto the bed, and continued expanding.

Wei Huan panicked and tried to brush it off. “Sh*t, don’t get our little master’s bed sheets dirty…”

But the wick transformed into a tiny person about the height of his palm. More accurately, it became a beautiful, glamorous young girl in red. She first held up her skirt and curtsied to Wei Huan, then stood straight and gracefully stared at him. “Hello, I am Changmingdeng* Niang.”
* means altar lamp burning day and night

Wei Huan was completely dumbfounded. “Changmingdeng Niang?”

Suddenly, he remembered something he’d learned in class—this was an extremely ancient type of demon, once relatively common in ancient times, now incredibly rare, only mentioned in historical texts about demons and spirits. It was said that this kind of spirit was formed from oil lamps that had burned for hundreds of years and gained sentience. Because they lived long enough, they possessed great knowledge and wisdom, familiar with both ancient and modern times. The teacher had even said that Changmingdeng Niang loved to appear as peerless beauties in the homes of men they fancied, to engage in deep conversations about history and the world.

Peerless beauty…

Wei Huan gave her a closer look.

Not bad, I guess.

But someone else’s face had already popped into his head. To keep himself from spiraling into more nonsense, Wei Huan quickly spoke up: “Nice to meet you, I’ve heard a lot about you.” He reached out his hand, realizing that his hand was enormous compared to the Changmingdeng Niang. But she didn’t seem the least bit awkward and politely shook Wei Huan’s index finger.

 

“Hello, are you human?” the Changmingdeng Niang looked at him suspiciously, then took a deep sniff. “You carry demonic energy.”

Wei Huan gave an awkward laugh. “Yes, it’s Golden Crow demon energy.”

The Changmingdeng Niang shook her head. “There’s another kind too. It’s faint, hard to distinguish for now, but I can say for sure—it belongs to a powerful demon.”

Holy cr*p, she’s legit!

“Your pet came all this way to find me. Though I haven’t seen a living soul in ages, it was so sincere that I made the trip.” The Changmingdeng Niang flicked her red sleeves twice. “If you have questions, feel free to ask. I will answer all I know, and leave nothing out.”

So it was the little furball who asked her to come—Wei Huan’s heart melted instantly. He picked up the silent little guy who’d crept to the side, let him perch on his fingertip, and gave him a couple affectionate strokes.

If this Changmingdeng Niang really knew that much…

Wei Huan thought for a moment. “Actually, I do have something I want to ask. I heard there’s a kind of spell in the demon realm that can summon the soul of the dead. Is that real? Which type of demon has that ability?”

The Changmingdeng Niang pondered a moment. “There is indeed such a spell. It’s called Soul Summoning.”

Before Wei Huan could get excited, she added, “But that spell hasn’t appeared in ages, and it’s not the innate ability of any specific type of demon.”

Wei Huan was confused. “What do you mean?”

“For example, that Golden Crow in your house—his power is fire, and he also possesses a unique ability with light. But he can’t summon souls. Soul Summoning is a rare and dangerous art, and the demon who created it also imposed extreme restrictions on it. Give me a moment, I need to check my notes.”

Oh—so even the Changmingdeng Niang needs to take notes.

She pulled a tiny notebook from her sleeve, the handwriting so small that Wei Huan couldn’t make out a single word. She flipped through it for so long that Wei Huan nearly dozed off.

“Found it.” She lifted the notebook and pointed to a spot. “Here.”

Wei Huan squinted hard for a long while. “…Sorry, I can’t read that.”

“It’s like this,” the Changmingdeng Niang put her notebook away. “This Soul Summoning technique was exclusive to Demon Witches. It’s also one of their most forbidden arts.”

“Demon Witches?” Wei Huan didn’t recall ever learning about such a creature.

“Yes. Just like humans have shamans or priestesses, demons have their own versions. Surely you’ve heard of that.”

Honestly, I know nothing about human stuff either.

He sat cross-legged on the bed. “So where can I find Demon Witches? Do they still exist?”

“Whether they still exist now, I don’t know. And where to find one…” The Changmingdeng Niang gave a ceremonial bow. “Forgive my limited power. I’m just a small spirit.”

“I see.” Wei Huan sighed. “It’s okay. I have one more question. If Soul Summoning can really call back a human soul, can it also bring back the soul of a dead demon?”

The Changmingdeng Niang raised her head and thought carefully. “Thousands of years ago, there was once a demon who tried it.”

“Who?” Wei Huan asked eagerly.

“That… I dare not say,” she looked to the side, avoiding the question.

Wei Huan didn’t get it. He followed her gaze—to the bedroom door.

Yun Yongzhou?

He couldn’t be from thousands of years ago…

Wait.

Suddenly, Wei Huan caught on. “You mean the first-generation Golden Crow?”

The Changmingdeng Niang took several steps back in fear, even forgot to lift her skirt, and plopped down on the bed. “Those weren’t my words! You said that yourself!”

So it was true.

“The first Golden Crow tried to summon whose soul?”

The Changmingdeng Niang hadn’t expected this human to be so persistent and good at extracting information. She looked troubled, but finally made up her mind and walked over to Wei Huan. “Please, lower your head.”

Wei Huan leaned in close, and the Changmingdeng Niang whispered in his ear, “Who held up Kunlun Void alone and died because of it?”

“…The Phoenix.”

It was like Wei Huan had suddenly stumbled upon some earth-shattering secret. He shot upright. “You’re saying… the first Golden Crow tried to summon the Phoenix’s soul?”

The Changmingdeng Niang stumbled backward and landed back on the soft bed in a panic. “I said nothing. That wasn’t me. You’re making things up.”

“Right, right, I’m just imagining things.”

So it really was true.

Holy cr*p, what a scandalous piece of top-secret gossip he’d just uncovered. The first generation Golden Crow and the great Phoenix—legendary ancestors!

“So did the summoning work?”

The Changmingdeng Niang just stared at him and stayed silent.

Oh—of course it didn’t. The Phoenix has been gone for thousands of years.

Wait, but why would the first Golden Crow try to summon the Phoenix’s soul? What was their relationship? Weren’t they supposed to be enemies? People always said the Golden Crow and Phoenix king never saw eye to eye…

Especially since there were no more Phoenixes afterward…

As Wei Huan sank into thought, the Changmingdeng Niang rose and gave another deep bow. “If you’ve finished your questions, I’ll take my leave.”

“Hey hey hey, don’t go!” Wei Huan panicked and grabbed her.

“Who shouldn’t go?”

A cool, clear voice suddenly came from behind. Wei Huan jumped in shock, and the Changmingdeng Niang in his hand trembled violently too. He turned his head and forced an awkward, helpless smile. “No one, hahaha, I was talking to the furball.”

“What’s that in your hand?” Yun Yongzhou crossed his arms. “Show me.”

Wei Huan’s smile froze. “It’s nothing, really~”

Although Yun Yongzhou enjoyed Wei Huan’s cutesy tone, he still repeated firmly, “Show me.”

This person was really impossible to reason with. Helpless, Wei Huan had no choice but to close his eyes and reluctantly open his palm to him.

Yun Yongzhou grabbed his wrist. “You were talking to this thing?”

Hm?

Wei Huan opened his eyes. In his palm, there was now only a small, blackened lamp wick. He finally let out a sigh of relief. “No, I already said I was talking to Little Furball. This is just a random piece of grass he picked up for me, right, Little Furball?”

Little Furball let out a soft whimper and scurried over, placing his pouch on the bed and tucking the tiny lamp wick back inside.

Thank goodness this little Changmingdeng Niang was clever. If Yun Yongzhou had seen it, he would have been furious—he would’ve found out that Wei Huan had summoned a female demon right on his bed.

Wei Huan felt a little guilty, though he wasn’t quite sure where the guilt came from. Still, he immediately acted like a bootlicker and stood up to ask with concern, “Aren’t you reading? Did you get tired?”

Yun Yongzhou just kept staring at him.

“Why are you staring at me?” Wei Huan smiled, like a little animal, his grin sweet and endearing. “Did you get tired of reading so you came to see me?”

He was just teasing, a habit of his. Who would’ve thought Yun Yongzhou would actually answer seriously in the next moment?

“That’s right.”