Side story 8: Fate (Ye Shuyan)
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As Ye Shuyan stood on the peak of the Yue Clan’s mountain for the last time, looking down at everything related to the Yue Clan, he reflected on his life. He realized that there wasn’t much remarkable to say about his life. Everything had unfolded according to destiny’s path, and if there were any surprises, there were only three.
Just like Xia Yuqing’s grandmother and Ying Yue, Ye Shuyan was also a child carefully chosen by the previous generation’s Yue Clan leader to be nurtured. However, what Xia Yuqing and the others didn’t know was that each time the Yue Clan leader selected a child for nurturing, it wasn’t just one child, but a dozen or so.
People from the four nations believed that the Yue Clan was favored by the gods. In the eyes of the Yue Clan, being chosen by the clan leader to inherit the future of the Yue Clan was an honor blessed and sheltered by the divine. Therefore, if oneself or their family members were chosen to be a part of it, or even to become the final leader of the Yue Clan, it was a tremendous honor.
Ye Shuyan was chosen at the age of four. At that time, he was still naive and couldn’t understand why his family members were so delighted when they found out he had been chosen. To him, being chosen meant that he might not be able to see his loved ones for the next dozen years, and that wasn’t something to be happy about.
Alongside Ye Shuyan, another boy from the same village was chosen, a big brother named Jiang Nuo. Ye Shuyan grew up playing with him, and they were as close as brothers. Knowing that he would have at least one familiar face after leaving home eased Ye Shuyan’s anxious feelings a bit.
Afterwards, Ye Shuyan was taken with Jiang Nuo to a place completely different from their previous home. There were luxurious houses, beautiful clothes, exquisite meals, but there were no longer family members by their side. Instead, they were surrounded by children who saw them as rivals, always displaying malice towards them.
During the four years there, as the youngest among everyone, Ye Shuyan was always the target of bullying. Fortunately, Jiang Nuo, who was older, always protected him, and because of that, Ye Shuyan came to rely on his big brother. Over those years, they truly became the best of brothers who could talk about anything.
Unfortunately, such a relationship wasn’t strong enough in the face of certain things. Just when Ye Shuyan thought that he and Jiang Nuo could continue being good brothers for a lifetime, changes happened.
From the moment they stepped into this place that was as beautiful as a paradise, Ye Shuyan and the other children understood that while being chosen was seen as a great favor in the eyes of outsiders, they knew that only one person would eventually become the clan leader, and the rest… would become discarded pawns, stepping stones beneath the feet of the one standing at the top.
Ye Shuyan was naturally naive as a child. At that time, he had no aspirations for the position of the clan leader. However, what he thought and what others saw were two different things.
As Ye Shuyan grew older, his extraordinary talent and abilities gradually became evident. The previous clan leader began to value him more, while the hostility from those around him also became more pronounced. What Ye Shuyan didn’t expect was that even the big brother who had always been by his side began to distance himself from him bit by bit.
Jiang Nuo thought Ye Shuyan didn’t notice, but the nerves of children were often more sensitive than those of adults. Early on, when Ye Shuyan began to reveal his exceptional talents and the clan leader’s attention shifted towards him, the other youths who had entered with them would often make sarcastic remarks in front of the two of them, saying things like:
“Who would’ve thought that Shuyan is so young and talented? Just look at how many times the clan leader has praised him these days.”
“That’s right, Shuyan is so young and already so impressive. He’s bound to have unlimited potential when he grows up. Jiang Nuo, you’re his older brother after all. You’ve been with him for so many years, don’t lose to your own younger brother.”
“That’s true…”
Countless comments like these, seemingly complimentary but actually taunting.
At that time, although Jiang Nuo would always tell himself not to worry, that he didn’t mind…
However, Ye Shuyan could still sense Jiang Nuo’s growing distance, elusive yet traceable. At that time, he was just a child and didn’t know what to do. He could only remain silent, thinking that as long as he didn’t break that delicate balance, their relationship could continue as it was. Unfortunately, he was mistaken.
If Ye Shuyan’s initial rise to prominence had planted a timed bomb between them, then his chance encounter with the ethereal and otherworldly man who favored him became the catalyst that truly shattered their relationship.
If the Yue Clan’s leader was believed to be favored by the gods, then the Yue Clan’s priests were genuinely the chosen ones. They could discern the will of the heavens from celestial phenomena and various unusual occurrences, truly capable of conveying the divine intent. Most importantly, the Yue Clan’s priests were not selected by humans but were a natural result of their own abilities. In other words, those who could become priests were the ones most adept at understanding the divine will within the entire Yue Clan.
Ye Shuyan never imagined that the person he had briefly met would turn out to be the priest, a figure even more revered than the clan leader in Yue Clan society. So, when he saw that extraordinary youth again, walking toward him as if descending from heaven, he was stunned.
“I told you we would meet again, Little Shuyan. My words have never been wrong.” Against the light, the man in white approached with his robe fluttering, like a celestial being. As he came closer, Ye Shuyan felt as if he had forgotten how to breathe.
Gazes converged on them from all directions, some envious, some jealous, and some filled with intense hatred.
Ye Shuyan had never thought that this chance meeting would completely change his life, nor did he expect that his longtime brother would turn against him due to this encounter, hating him to the core.
Jealousy, once planted, could quickly take root and grow into an ugly creature too hideous to look at.
Ye Shuyan would never forget the day when Jiang Nuo grabbed his throat, his face twisted in anger as he yelled at him.
“Why? Why do I treat you so well, but you treat me like this? You obviously know everything, yet I have to teach you bit by bit. Did you enjoy hearing those people’s words? I’m not as good as you, yes, I admit it! You must look down on me in your heart, just like they do, right? Laughing at my incompetence, laughing at my humiliation? Why? Even though you secretly mock me in your heart, you still approach me with that disgusting demeanor, acting respectful towards me? You hypocrite, you hypocrite, you make me sick.”
At that time, Ye Shuyan wanted to tell him that he had never felt that way. At that time, he sincerely respected the person before him as an older brother. He had always treated him like family, never looking down on him, never ridiculing him. Unfortunately, at that moment, Jiang Nuo’s hands were squeezing his throat so tightly that he couldn’t make a sound. Jiang Nuo continued to roar, as if he wanted to vent all the accumulated resentment of those years in that instant.
“You have everything. You’ve got natural talent, the favor of the clan leader. Why, why can you even win the favor of the priest? Why do you get to be so lucky? You’ve got everything, and I’ve got nothing, absolutely nothing. I’m like a bug crawling on the ground, waiting for anyone to come and crush me. I’m not resigned, I’m not resigned!”
This person had gone mad! That was the fleeting thought that crossed Ye Shuyan’s mind. His tear-drenched vision blurred, feeling a bit sour and painful in his heart. He couldn’t tell if he was hurt by Jiang Nuo’s baseless accusations or if it was the betrayal of his closest person that left him feeling cold.
Just when Ye Shuyan thought he was about to be doomed by Jiang Nuo’s hands, the timely appearance of the clan leader and the priest saved his life.
Feeling the influx of air from the outside and the sudden resurgence of life, Ye Shuyan almost eagerly looked at the person who had tried to harm him, hoping to see a trace of remorse and lingering affection for their past relationship in their eyes. However, he was disappointed. In that person’s eyes, there was nothing but deep-seated resentment towards him.
After that incident, everyone was shocked. Clearly, no one had expected Jiang Nuo, the person closest to Ye Shuyan, to be the first to commit such a crazed act.
Not long after the incident, Jiang Nuo was sent back to where he had come from, and Ye Shuyan never saw him again. Later, he heard that Jiang Nuo had died shortly after being returned.
Upon learning this news, Ye Shuyan’s heart inexplicably ached for a moment. It wasn’t his fault, but he felt a subtle sense of guilt. The terrifying face of Jiang Nuo choking him that day continued to haunt his mind.
Many years later, when Ye Shuyan was no longer the ignorant child he had once been, he finally understood Jiang Nuo’s feelings at that time.
Among the children who were sent there, Jiang Nuo wasn’t particularly gifted or good-looking. He was often suppressed by those who sought trouble, facing both overt and covert ridicule. Fortunately, at that time, he was even worse off than Jiang Nuo. Undeniably, most people are creatures driven by vanity and inflated memories. When Jiang Nuo helped Ye Shuyan, he was essentially seeking a sense of achievement that had already been eroded, seeking his own redemption. Unfortunately, this redemption ultimately became the very hand that pushed him into the abyss.
Being surpassed by someone who was initially beneath him was far more stimulating than being blocked by those who were already superior. So, at that time, Jiang Nuo couldn’t tolerate Ye Shuyan, who had previously needed his guidance, gradually gaining recognition. Suddenly, when he came to his senses, he found that Ye Shuyan had sprinted ahead of him, even ahead of everyone else, and had become a weapon of mockery pointed at him.
The reliance he had leaned on for a sense of presence disappeared in an instant, leaving him in the muddy darkness. The person ran out to the limelight in the spotlight. Deeply stimulated and under various pressures, Jiang Nuo was driven to the brink of madness.
Years later, after realizing this, Ye Shuyan couldn’t help but sigh. He had never thought that at that time, they hadn’t been defeated by anyone else but by their own human nature.
After Jiang Nuo was sent back, Ye Shuyan truly became isolated. Those who had already harbored ill feelings toward him took pleasure in his situation when they heard about the incident.
However, this didn’t trouble Ye Shuyan too much, because not long after, under the envious and jealous gaze of everyone, he was taken away from that place by the High Priest.
Several years passed in the blink of an eye. During those years, Ye Shuyan enjoyed a tranquility he had never experienced before. The High Priest was just as others had seen him—radiating a gentle light that seemed to calm people’s hearts as long as they were by his side. However, Ye Shuyan’s identity at the time ensured that his days couldn’t remain calm and smooth forever.
Ye Shuyan didn’t know what kind of agreement the High Priest and the clan leader had made behind the scenes, but as he grew out of his youthful naivety and became a young man, the white-robed youth who had accompanied him for years reached out and touched his head, telling him it was time for him to take on his responsibilities.
Standing on the sacred altar, Ye Shuyan knelt before the High Priest, accepting his honor and shouldering his responsibilities, guarding the entire Yue Clan in his place.
After that day, Ye Shuyan never saw that person again. A month later, the sudden abdication of the clan leader put Ye Shuyan at the forefront of the storm.
What no one knew was that the day before ascending the throne, Ye Shuyan clearly saw a remarkably bright star in the sky suddenly fall.
Ye Shuyan vaguely remembered that on the evening when he was first taken to the High Priest, the moon was cool and clear like water. The High Priest held him as they sat in a tree, pointing to the stars in the sky and telling him, “Little Shuyan, do you see those stars in the sky? Are they beautiful? Do you know? This vast night sky is actually a still world, and the stars above represent the many people on the ground. When a star shines brightly, it means the person it represents is shining brilliantly in the eyes of the world. And if a star becomes dim, it means the person it represents is weakening. If a star completely falls, it means the person it represents has left this world. See those most dazzling stars up there? Those are the royal stars, representing the kings of the four nations. The dimmer ones are the common people.”
Ye Shuyan remembered asking him at that time, “Which star is the High Priest? And which star is Shuyan?”
The person was taken aback for a moment, then smiled faintly and pointed to a star just slightly dimmer than the royal star, which was located not far from it. He told Ye Shuyan, “This one is me.”
Then he pointed to a smaller star nearby and said, “This one is Little Shuyan. Don’t be deceived by its current small size. When Little Shuyan grows up, that star will surely shine brighter than any other and replace me in my position.”
At that time, he didn’t understand the meaning behind those words. He was constantly puzzled by the question: If he were to reach the position of the High Priest, where would the star that belonged to the High Priest go?
On that very night, he got his answer. After the star that belonged to that person fell unexpectedly, he witnessed with his own eyes his own star changing its trajectory. It accurately moved to the position where the fallen star had been and radiated a dazzling light in its place.
That night, Ye Shuyan didn’t sleep a wink. He kept his eyes open, gazing at the stars all night long, until the sky gradually turned pale with the arrival of the crescent moon, and the stars no longer twinkled brightly in the sky.
The next day, once again under the envious gaze of everyone, he took on the role of the leader of the Yue Clan, becoming the first person in the history of the Yue Clan to simultaneously inherit the positions of leader and High Priest.
The people around him rejoiced, feeling as if they had witnessed a miracle. But only he knew that on that day, he had never shown a smile from beginning to end.
He inherited the position of High Priest, receiving the blessings of the divine as the chosen one. As long as he held this position, his appearance would remain preserved, immune to aging or decay.
However, everything comes with a price. He received a divine gift and was bound to shoulder responsibilities. The responsibilities of both the leader and the High Priest meant eternal guardianship of the Yue Clan, never defying the divine will, never bringing harm to the clan. What was once a single duty had already felt heavy enough; the added responsibility compounded it. Just the thought of it felt burdensome, let alone finding room for laughter.
History proved Ye Shuyan right. In the few short years that followed, the people who had accompanied him, whether it was Jiang Nuo or the High Priest, had all departed. They hadn’t left much of a mark on his life’s canvas. In the years that followed, he watched those around him grow and age, coldly observing their changes, while he alone remained unchanged. Others might have found this exceptionally valuable, but only Ye Shuyan knew that beneath his unchanging appearance was a heart gradually withering into a wasteland.
If Jiang Nuo could be considered Ye Shuyan’s first unexpected event, then Xia Yuqing’s grandmother, the girl he had personally selected and intended to groom as his successor, named Yan Er, was definitely his second unexpected event.
The first time the idea of grooming a successor crossed Ye Shuyan’s mind was when he turned forty. While forty might be considered lengthy in the eyes of ordinary people, in Ye Shuyan’s view, it was but the blink of an eye.
When a person guards something for decades, it’s inevitable that a feeling of loneliness will set in. Ye Shuyan was no exception. Therefore, at that time, he suddenly thought of finding someone to accompany him and pass the time. Even though many within the clan felt it was too early to groom a successor at this point, he resolutely followed his own thoughts, maintaining his stubborn stance.
Perhaps due to his childhood experiences, Ye Shuyan didn’t go through the process his predecessors had—selecting the most outstanding candidates from those he had groomed. Instead, he made an immediate decision, directly determining the fortunate one.
The first time he saw that girl, Ye Shuyan felt that she was remarkably spirited. Just as the High Priest had taken one look at him and determined that he would succeed him, telling him they would meet again soon, Ye Shuyan almost immediately sensed that the girl was destined for something exceptional. It was just that he hadn’t expected her exceptional qualities to extend not only to her talents but also to her audacious courage.
Ye Shuyan raised the girl for a full twelve years, watching her transform from an innocent girl into an elegant young woman. A fatherly pride made him indulge her in every way, providing her with a measure of comfort in this desolate river of time. But he never anticipated that, in the end, the child he had raised for so many years would give him such a surprise.
Ye Shuyan would never forget the sight of the girl he had treated as his own daughter kneeling before him, telling him that she had fallen in love with a man, a member of the royal family of one of the Four Kingdoms.
At that moment, he maintained a stoic expression, his palms clenched so tightly they nearly drew blood. After a silence that seemed to stretch on forever, he asked the girl just one question, “Yan Er, do you remember the first thing your adoptive father told you when he brought you here?”
Ye Shuyan clearly saw the girl kneeling before him tremble all over, shaking as she uttered her response, “Never interfere in the affairs of the Four Kingdoms, never establish connections with the royal families of the Four Kingdoms.”
Ye Shuyan didn’t make any further gesture in response. He simply told her, “You have to choose between him and your adoptive father.”
Ye Shuyan had initially thought that the girl might have some feelings left for him, leading her to hesitate between the two choices. And indeed, there was a momentary hesitation.
Ye Shuyan witnessed the girl bite her lip, raise her head with determination, and say, “I choose him.” Afterward, without looking back, she steadfastly clung to the path she had chosen, forcibly pulling herself away from his world, leaving no room for compromise.
Ye Shuyan silently watched the girl’s figure gradually fade from his view, feeling an emptiness in his heart. In the end, he was alone.
Ye Shuyan knew that the girl’s resolute choice to be with that man would inevitably lead to trouble. After all, the rules of the Yue Clan were clear, and by defying them, she was certain to pay a price.
But even he hadn’t anticipated the magnitude of that price. He had no idea what he had done during the time when everyone in the Yue Clan started falling ill, and the sickness began to spread uncontrollably, baffling even the doctors. All he remembered was a brief moment of blankness in his mind. When he regained his senses, he was standing in front of the altar.
This time, it was his turn to choose. On one side was the entire Yue Clan, and on the other was the child he had raised from childhood. In the end, without a doubt, he chose the Yue Clan.
Amidst the flames of war and the pounding of war drums, vast stretches of fire mixed with streams of blood, staining the towering palace walls and smooth marble tiles. Ye Shuyan slowly approached the girl trapped in the sea of fire, holding the lifeless body of the man she had chosen.
Years had transformed the girl from back then into a mature and beautiful woman. But sadly, in the end, she couldn’t protect the one she wanted to safeguard. Now, she appeared exceptionally worn out. Upon seeing him, she nearly threw herself at his feet, pleading for him to save the person in her arms.
At that moment, Ye Shuyan cast a cold glance at her and told her, “I’ll give you another chance. Your adoptive father or the corpse in your arms—choose one.”
Ye Shuyan clearly saw the fiery resolve in her eyes fade in an instant. She then lowered her head and chuckled softly, clutching the lifeless body in her arms with a resolute determination, saying, “I choose him.”
This time, Ye Shuyan wasn’t very surprised. He calmly recounted his actions, hiding nothing from her.
Seeing the girl lose her former composure and charge towards him, Ye Shuyan unexpectedly felt a sense of gratification.
“How could you? How could you? I did this on my own. It has nothing to do with them. Why… why did you harm my child? Why?”
The girl’s desperate cries echoed in his ears, yet Ye Shuyan only responded with one phrase, “Nothing to do with them? Is it not related to the Yue Clan? Just because of your selfishness, you want all of the Yue Clan to pay for your recklessness?”
The girl’s expression changed, and she suddenly found herself unable to speak.
“Yan Er, your adoptive father warned you from the very beginning that everything comes with a price. This is the price you have to pay, and no one is obligated to clean up your mess because of your selfishness.” With those words, Ye Shuyan turned away without any hesitation, leaving.
The raging fire burned even more fiercely. The grand palace collapsed in an instant. Yet even until the last moment, Ye Shuyan could still hear the girl’s voice coming from inside, pleading with him to spare her child, no matter what.
Listening to the sounds of the palace collapsing behind him, Ye Shuyan closed his eyes in silence. He had heard her plea, but he didn’t know how to respond. From the moment he made his choice, the outcome had already been determined.
He couldn’t disregard the Yue Clan for her mere words. It wasn’t that he had deep feelings for the Yue Clan, but the responsibilities of the past leaders and High Priests had already become ingrained in his very being, forcing him to bear this burden.
Afterwards, everything became unexpectedly smooth, much to Ye Shuyan’s surprise. Several years later, Xia Yuqing’s mother, the child of that person, would follow the same path as that person.
They seemed trapped in a peculiar cycle, unable to break free. He had to marvel at how truly mother and daughter were alike. When he reappeared to inquire about the girl who bore a resemblance to the one from years ago, he unsurprisingly received the same answer as before.
Ye Shuyan furrowed his brow, not understanding what force was driving these people to such persistence. Because of his confusion, he couldn’t help but ask.
In response, he received a surprised and perceptive gaze from the girl. “Have you… ever liked someone? That feeling where having them is like having everything, where you’re willing to sacrifice and give up everything, even in times of danger, just to protect them. Have you experienced that?”
Ye Shuyan trembled, looking into the girl’s clear, almost translucent eyes. For the first time in his life, he felt a sense of doubt, a question forming: To have someone is like having everything?
Undeniably, the girl’s words left Ye Shuyan feeling a sense of confusion he had never experienced before. And because of that confusion, he made an unexpected choice of selecting another successor. When he saw Ying Yue, all his attention was fixated on the eyes of this child. The fiery gaze seemed to stir up a faint ripple in his long-stagnant heart.
His intuition told him that this was what he had been missing. And so, almost as if driven by some mystical force, he chose to keep this child by his side.
Subsequent events proved him right. Through this child, he glimpsed a longing for family, but that was far from enough. The kind of fondness the girl had mentioned was clearly more complex.
Just as Ye Shuyan struggled to distinguish between these nuances, he encountered the most exceptional anomaly of his life, the most unexpected surprise.
Xia Yuqing, the descendant of that person, the little princess of Xia Kingdom, found herself in a situation much like her mother’s. Due to a twist of fate, she became entangled with the Emperor of Ye Kingdom. But that was the extent of it.
Ye Shuyan had thought that everything would conclude with Xia Yuqing’s accidental drowning. However, he didn’t anticipate that at this very moment, the celestial patterns that had remained unchanged for a century would suddenly shift, propelling everything into the unknown.
This unknown filled Ye Shuyan with an unusual sense of fear. Thus, he sent the most trusted maid he had to the side of this extraordinary anomaly, protecting Xia Yuqing, hoping to correct the path of the celestial patterns. Yet, everything remained unchanged.
Ye Shuyan watched in person as the star representing Xia Yuqing, which had dimmed after she fell into the water, unexpectedly regained its brilliance in a surprising manner. The star emitted a light different from before. He also witnessed this seemingly insignificant star gradually invading the entire night sky, altering its course as well as the trajectories of everyone who came into contact with it, even those who had never encountered it.
She was like a sudden butterfly, fluttering into everyone’s orbits while remaining unaware of it herself.
During that period, Ye Shuyan watched this girl named Xia Yuqing travel through various corners of the Four Kingdoms, interacting with all sorts of people.
Ying Yue’s words were accurate: this girl, though outwardly timid and neither skilled in knowledge nor martial arts, her only redeeming feature being her appearance, managed to attract countless people to her side. It wasn’t about personal gain; perhaps it was due to her purity, or maybe it was the comfort of being around her, not needing to hide one’s true self. Despite being aware of her numerous flaws, people couldn’t help but be drawn in by her exuberance. Even he found himself succumbing to it.
He watched as Xia Yuqing struggled and stumbled alongside Feng Tingye, watched her jest with her own relatives, tease her friends with harmless jokes. He observed how everyone felt both powerless and accommodating towards her. The heart that had been stagnant as a pond under the erosion of time surprisingly produced ripples that he had never anticipated.
However, even though the celestial patterns had changed, there were certain things that remained unalterable. Take Xia Yuqing, for instance. More accurately, it was the fate carried within the bloodline of the body Xia Yuqing inhabited that couldn’t be changed unless a much more costly price was paid.
When it came to the choice between Xia Yuqing and the Yue Clan, Ye Shuyan had no doubt and once again chose the Yue Clan. This time, aside from duty, there was also… the sense of mission and habit he had developed over centuries, prioritizing the survival and honor of his clan.
At the moment when Ye Shuyan revealed the truth to Xia Yuqing, he successfully saw the shattered expression on the face of the seemingly optimistic girl. In the end, he shattered her dreams at the final juncture.
In that instant, Ye Shuyan found an unusual pang of unwillingness in his heart, but he quickly suppressed it.
He watched Xia Yuqing’s shock over the so-called future, and then he watched her exchange cold words with him, driven by the possibility of the fate that might continue in her child. At that moment, Ye Shuyan saw the girl from the past who had pleaded for him on behalf of her child. He saw the woman who had carefully considered Xia Yuqing’s future. It turned out that no matter how delicate a woman might be, once they touched upon their bottom line, they could become just as resolute as men, defending what they cherished.
If Xia Yuqing’s sudden assertion of strength only briefly surprised Ye Shuyan, her final words truly shook his heart.
She said, “Ye Shuyan, do you really have a heart?”
A heart? Ying Yue’s longing for his parents, which had already been extinguished and abandoned when he was sent to that place. His feelings of closeness toward friends and family had all dissipated, especially after Jiang Nuo had choked him. As for the other various emotions, they had slowly left him as time passed. His heart had long become as desolate as a barren desert, how could he feel the intense vibrations of a heart beating within his chest? The High Priest had discovered this aspect of him when he took him under his wing, and that was why he had told him.
“Little Shuyan, locking away your heart prematurely may shield you from harm in the future, but it also means that you won’t be able to genuinely care for others anymore. You’ll inevitably be lonely for the rest of your life, and that loneliness will gradually erode your rationality, completely isolating you from the world. At that time… you will surely regret it.”
What he never anticipated was that, after many years of wandering in the mortal world, the door that he had never opened and had only tightened over time would be forcibly pried open in the moment he saw Xia Yuqing jump off the cliff after firing the gun.
It turned out that there were truly people who would sacrifice everything, even their lives, for another person’s safety and well-being.
At that time, Ye Shuyan had no idea why he had chosen to meet the man, the one Xia Yuqing had wanted to keep safe at all costs, the current emperor of Ye Kingdom, Feng Tingye. Everything was already over, and as long as he turned a blind eye, he could return to a leisurely life for another decade or more, just like he had done several times before.
Feng Tingye wasn’t a fool. Even though he had been duped at the last moment, his inherent wisdom and extraordinary insight as a ruler became apparent.
“Why are you all still here? To watch a spectacle? Your initial goal was Ai Fei, right? Since that’s the case, now that Ai Fei is no longer here, why do you remain? To witness our miserable state?”
At that time, Feng Tingye’s emotions were unstable; anyone could see it. Ying Yue even probed, “Are you thinking of committing suicide together with that girl?”
Ye Shuyan initially thought Feng Tingye wouldn’t answer that question, but he hadn’t expected Feng Tingye to remain silent for a long while before uttering, “No, I will wait for her to return. We made a promise. When the deadline arrives, she promised to return.”
“What if, when the deadline comes, she still hasn’t returned?”
Feng Tingye suddenly looked up, gazing directly at him. Though he didn’t speak, the determination in his eyes revealed his decision.
Ye Shuyan furrowed his brow. “Why?” Why is it that all of you can so easily give up what others have dreamt of, while the things you’ve never possessed yourself seem to matter so much?
Feng Tingye chuckled lightly, and with unwavering determination, he told him, “Because she is my everything. I can let go of this country, I can delegate my responsibilities to others, but she, in this lifetime, the next, and for all the lifetimes to come, can only belong to me!”
In that moment, Ye Shuyan distinctly heard the door that had been slightly pried open within his heart being pushed wide open from the outside once again.
Xia Yuqing’s departure undoubtedly had a tremendous impact. Ye Shuyan personally witnessed numerous people feeling heartbroken and guilty over her departure. He saw countless people saddened and moved by her leaving. Unlike her mother and the child he had nurtured in the past, her presence left an indelible mark on many.
Observing so many people’s pain, for the first time in his life, Ye Shuyan wondered if he had done something wrong. The initial rebellion of the girl, the downfall of the former dynasty, and even the death of the man she cared about the most— all these could be considered her deserved punishment, she couldn’t blame others. But what about later? What mistakes did Xia Yuqing’s mother and Xia Yuqing herself make? Was it a mistake for them to become his successors?
Using his self-proclaimed broad-mindedness, he had compelled them to sacrifice themselves in exchange for the well-being of those they cared about. But in the wake of their departure, he realized he had inadvertently achieved his mission and protected the tranquility of the Yue Clan while causing immense suffering to so many others. He had accused Yan Er of selfishness back then, but was he any different?
At that moment atop the mountain, the cold wind blew against him, snapping him out of his confused state of mind. In that moment, he finally woke up, realizing that in this lifetime—from Jiang Nuo to the High Priest, to Yan Er, Yan Er’s daughter, and finally to Xia Yuqing—he had thought he had shouldered his responsibilities and protected what he should, but he hadn’t recognized how, under the pretext of protection, he had recklessly hurt others. He had already stained his hands with blood.
In that sudden moment of clarity, Ye Shuyan understood the High Priest’s words from back then. He understood the sigh from beneath the moonlight all those years ago.
He said, “Little Shuyan, don’t think that living a long life is a happy thing. When you discover that no matter how much time passes, in the end, you are the only one left in the entire world, you will realize that the most torturous punishment in this world is being forever frozen in time.”
At that moment, Ye Shuyan finally comprehended the true intent behind the High Priest’s words. He also understood that after experiencing countless journeys and nearly a century of time, when all the people from the past had become the burdens of his sins, he needed to sever the root of this sin. He needed to exchange his endless and mundane life to bring back the people everyone cared about, to put an end to their destiny.
In the instant he stepped onto the divine altar once again, Ye Shuyan suddenly felt an unprecedented lightness. In that moment, under the glaring light, he seemed to see the white-clad youth who had accompanied him for many years, the one who had touched his head and told him it was time to take on his responsibilities, wearing an expression of delight and anticipation. It turned out that back then, he had wanted to convey that only by truly letting go of his burdens could he find liberation.
If he could choose again, he would rather never have been favored by fate, never been chosen, never been noticed, never been fortunate. He just wanted to be a carefree child, spending his ordinary childhood with his family, passing through the youth surrounded by relatives and friends, entering middle age with great vigor and spirit, and finally stepping into old age with silver hair, supported and accompanied by those around him. He didn’t want a lifetime constrained by duty, oppressed throughout his life, silent throughout his life, and lonely throughout his life.
That person’s words were right. Everything ultimately came at a cost. In the eyes of everyone else, they were God’s favored, but only they knew that for the sake of that title, they had braved thorns and hardships, stained themselves with countless sins, paid unimaginable costs, and endured profound loneliness.
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