Incense for sleep burned inside the hall. I lay on the bed, staring silently at the canopy embroidered with dragons and phoenixes above me. My expression was calm; inside, however, I was in agony…
Someone once asked me a question.
He asked: If your wife and your lover both fell into the water at the same time, which one would you save?
I was very conflicted.
Seeing that, he asked again: Then let me put it this way, if your own wife and someone else’s wife both fell into the water, which one would you save?
That one was easy. I immediately shouted, “Only an idiot would save someone else’s wife! Of course I’d save my own!”
I suppose it was to punish me for my initial hesitation that Heaven handed that “idiot” to me, a man reputed to be wise and heroic, strikingly resembling the great Emperor Chengzu, the Crown Prince Qi Sheng.
Ah… it’s truly a long story. I’d better start from the beginning.
That day, the Star Lord of Fate secretly took me out of the underworld. Carrying me up onto a cloud, he flew for quite a while. I was dizzy and disoriented when he finally stopped above a waterside pavilion and said, “Wait here. Your physical body will arrive shortly.”
I clung to the edge of the cloud and retched for a while before feeling better. Then I peered down and saw an exquisite pavilion set upon a lake. Surrounding it were terraces and towers adorned with carved beams and painted pillars, luxurious and grand. I couldn’t help but feel delighted. From the look of this estate, the family was either wealthy or noble. If I could be reborn here, there would surely be no shortage of money and beauties. What a fortunate fate!
The Star Lord of Fate seemed to read my thoughts. Looking slightly embarrassed, he said, “If it weren’t for the fact that you once helped me, I could never have defied your destiny to bring you here…”
I waved him off. “I know, I know. Many thanks, Star Lord.”
He had already repeated it the entire way that I had once done him a favor in my previous life, that he couldn’t bear to see me die young, so he secretly took me from the underworld to grant me a few more decades of wealth and honor. I’d heard it so many times I could practically recite it.
He added, “After you’re reborn, you must absolutely not—”
I had no mind to listen. Leaning over the cloud, I saw two beautiful young women walking slowly across a bridge. I exclaimed, “Hey! Look at that, those two are gorgeous!”
The Star Lord of Fate leaned over as well. After glancing at the women now chatting on the bridge, he suddenly asked, “Which one do you like?”
“The one in red,” I answered. She had ample curves and a slender waist, truly top-tier. The one beside her in white was too thin for my taste, like she’d overdone the dieting.
The Star Lord of Fate visibly relaxed. “That’s good.”
I was puzzled. Pointing at the girl in red, I asked, “Who is she?”
“The current Crown Princess, Lady Zhang. Her father is the Ministry of War’s Shangshu; her grandfather is the Grand General Who Protects the Nation.”
“Wow! What a powerful family!” I exclaimed.
“Of course. How else could she become Crown Princess?”
“And the one beside her?”
“That is Lady Jiang, Zhao Wangfei.”
“She’s pretty too, though her face looks a bit melancholy.”
The Star Lord of Fate crouched awkwardly to peer down and finally lay flat at the edge of the cloud. “Ah, you don’t know the twists and turns of this story…”
He was in the middle of explaining when a group approached by the lake. At the front was a pale, handsome young man in splendid robes, supporting a middle-aged noblewoman, surrounded by attendants.
I asked again, “Who’s that pretty boy?”
“That’s the current Crown Prince, Qi Sheng,” replied the Star Lord.
The Crown Prince, that meant he was the husband of the girl in red.
Qi Sheng glanced up and saw the two women on the bridge. His expression froze for a moment, then his gaze shifted several times: cold, then warm. Just as I was wondering what he was thinking, I heard two splashes. Looking back, both women had fallen into the water. Immediately after, a figure rushed from the lakeside and leapt in without hesitation.
My heart leapt. Remembering the earlier question about saving one’s own wife or someone else’s, I was ecstatic. Tugging at the Star Lord of Fate’s sleeve, I asked, “Am I going to be the Crown Prince in this life?”
The Star Lord looked oddly uncomfortable. After hesitating, he muttered, “Uh… more or less.”
“What do you mean, ‘more or less’?”
“Just watch.”
I leaned forward again, but before I could see clearly, the Star Lord of Fate shouted behind me, “The time has come, go!”
A powerful force struck my back. Before I could react, I tumbled off the cloud. Everything went black, and I lost consciousness.
When I opened my eyes again, three days had passed.
I finally understood what he meant by “more or less.” In this life, I did indeed have the words “Crown Prince” attached to me but he was the Crown Prince, and I was the consort. Crown Princess. Just one word’s difference.
Truly “more or less”!
Incense burned in the hall as I lay on the bed, staring at the dragon-and-phoenix canopy. My face was calm; inside, I was in agony…
Oh, I forgot. I don’t have those anymore. I can’t be in that kind of pain anymore.
Now I have curves and a slender waist. My chest is certainly ample; my waist is indeed slim, exactly what I once admired… But now that these assets are on my own body, touching them feels strangely unsettling.
D*mn you, Star Lord of Fate! Were you repaying a favor or taking revenge?
A palace maid entered quietly and knelt beside the bed. “Her Majesty the Empress intends to execute Lady Jiang. His Highness the Crown Prince and Zhao Wang are kneeling outside Xingsheng Palace, pleading for mercy.”
Her voice carried a trace of resentment. I turned to look at her, such a pretty girl, wasted on that tone.
Seeing me turn, she leaned closer, nearly pressing against the bed. “Niangniang, what are your orders?”
Just that one line dragged my wandering thoughts back. A beauty may be beautiful but what does that have to do with me now?
She hesitated, then urged softly, “Niang Niang, you cannot remain so dispirited. Even if the Crown Prince saved that wretch, what of it? The charge of harming the imperial heir has been confirmed. The Empress will never spare her. If that woman cannot escape death, then Your Highness must appear magnanimous. You must show it to the Crown Prince. Show it to the Empress. This is not the time to quarrel with His Highness, or all your previous efforts will be wasted!”
I watched her red lips move as she spoke.
Everything she said had already been explained to me by the Star Lord: two women fighting over one man, two men loving one woman, a perfect four-cornered entanglement, just enough for a mahjong table. Both the Crown Prince and Zhao Wang loved Lady Jiang. Both Lady Zhang and Lady Jiang loved the Crown Prince. But Lady Zhang had the stronger family backing and used a few tricks. Thus she married the Crown Prince, while Lady Jiang reluctantly wed Zhao Wang.
As a fellow man, I have to admire Zhao Wang’s magnanimity, knowing she didn’t love him and marrying her anyway. Pitiful, really.
And as for the Crown Prince, his moral character is impressive indeed! When his own wife and someone else’s wife fell into the water, he saved someone else’s wife first. Such selfless devotion! Never mind that his own wife was pregnant at the time. Tragic. Infuriating.
The maid called anxiously, “Niang Niang!”
Ah, “Niang Niang” again. I was truly conflicted. Should I do this job or not?
If I do, I must watch a whole flock of beauties and never touch them.
If I don’t, I won’t even have the chance to look at them.
But even if I choose to do it, how should I do it? Everyone knows being Crown Princess is the worst job in the world:
First: Terrible promotion prospects. Crown Princess to Empress to Empress Dowager, it’s harder than climbing to the heavens. How many Crown Princesses actually make it that far?
Second: No job security. No benefits. You can be dismissed at any time and you’re not allowed to find another job afterward!
Third: Extremely dangerous. If the Crown Prince fails to become Emperor, you fall with him. If he succeeds, you still have to worry about falling alone.
Fourth: Essentially a service position. The workload may not be heavy, but the “client”…
In conclusion, being Crown Princess is a terrible job: no future, high pressure, brutal competition… The only perk might be the excellent work environment, full of pleasing sights.
To do it or not, I was truly torn.
“Niang Niang!” the maid urged again.
At last, I made my decision.
“Fine,” I said helplessly. “Help me up. We’re going to Xingsheng Palace.”
Her almond-shaped eyes widened in disbelief.
I wanted to tell her: Young lady, you’re still too inexperienced. No matter what profession you’re in, pleasing the boss is a mandatory course. If you eliminate the boss’s favorite, you won’t be far from unemployment yourself.
