Shoutout to Tachibanaswife for the commission!
Qi Sheng slightly closed his eyes, putting on an air of “leniency for confession, severity for resistance.”
But who am I? I’m someone who’s lived in a harmonious society! Who doesn’t know that confessing brings a life sentence, while resisting lets you go home for the New Year!
I gave a light cough, cleared my throat, and decided to make the mythological story sound as plausible as possible.
“I was originally a minor immortal in the Heavenly Realm. Because…”
Qi Sheng suddenly interrupted: “What kind of immortal?”
I froze. “Uh? …a wandering immortal.”
Qi Sheng raised a brow. “A wandering immortal?”
I held my ground. “Yes! A wandering immortal! The kind that drifts around all day doing nothing, part of the Heavenly Court’s idle personnel.”
Qi Sheng finally nodded. “Oh.”
I continued making it up: “I was originally a wandering immortal in the Heavenly Realm, but because I committed a small offense, I was punished by being sent back into reincarnation…”
Qi Sheng interrupted again: “What offense?”
He kept cutting me off until I was full of irritation, but I could only suppress it and answer, “A small matter.”
Qi Sheng asked again: “What small matter?”
Hey? Have you ever seen someone listen to a story like this? Why is this person so annoying?
I almost scratched my head and had to improvise: “Something trivial, one day, the Jade Emperor called everyone to attend a banquet. At the banquet, I drank a bit too much and accidentally broke the glazed cup in my hand. Then the Queen Mother got angry and decided to punish me.”
Qi Sheng snorted. “That really is small, being punished for breaking a cup. You’re quite a pitiful immortal.”
I gave an awkward dry laugh. “The Queen Mother is a bit petty!”
Qi Sheng didn’t laugh again. He just quietly stared at me.
I forced myself to continue: “So I was punished to re-enter reincarnation. But because I had previously had a quarrel with the Star Lord of Fate, that fellow used his position for personal revenge. He deliberately detained my soul a little longer and let a distant relative of his occupy my body in this lifetime for more than ten years. Later, when the Heavenly Court audited accounts, he got scared this matter would be discovered, so he hurriedly returned the body to me. Lady Zhang and I switched bodies back. When I arrived, it happened to coincide with Lady Zhang falling into the water, and when I opened my eyes again, I became what I am now.”
I rattled all of that off in one breath, then looked at Qi Sheng.
Qi Sheng remained silent for quite a while.
I wondered whether he didn’t understand, or simply didn’t believe me?
Then Qi Sheng suddenly asked, “Aren’t immortals supposed to be free of desire? Do they also scheme against each other and take personal revenge like this?”
I suddenly thought of all those immortal romance novels where people love to the point of life and death, and couldn’t help sighing. “The Heavenly Court isn’t much different from the mortal world. This is nothing, you haven’t seen those immortals arguing all day. For the sake of love, they’re ready to live or die, lining up to jump off the Immortal Execution Platform for martyrdom!”
Qi Sheng’s brows faintly furrowed. He asked, “In your previous life… were you ever married?”
I froze. In a flash I understood what Qi Sheng really wanted to ask, wasn’t he just asking whether I was still a virgin! I immediately looked at Qi Sheng with utmost sincerity and swore to the heavens, “Your Highness, I dare not guarantee anything else, but this one thing I can promise, in my previous life I was absolutely never married, nor did I ever like any man!”
Perhaps my expression was too sincere. Qi Sheng, feeling assured that his head had never worn a green hat, finally nodded with satisfaction.
The heavy stone in my heart finally dropped with a loud thud.
The corners of Qi Sheng’s lips lifted slightly, but soon flattened again. He leaned back against the cushions and closed his eyes to rest.
I hadn’t expected him to truly believe my story. As long as he didn’t continue questioning me, I was already very satisfied.
I sat stiffly for a while. Unable to bear it any longer, I secretly shifted my numb backside.
Qi Sheng suddenly said softly, “Come here.”
My scalp tightened slightly, and I hesitated before inching forward.
Qi Sheng reached out, wrapped an arm around my waist, and pulled me onto him. Looking into my eyes, he said, “I don’t care who you were before. Just remember that now you are my Crown Princess, and in the future you will be my Empress. That is enough.”
I forced myself not to push him away, silently chanting in my heart: I’ll still become the Empress Dowager… the Empress Dowager… the Empress Dowager…
Qi Sheng quietly watched me, but the hand resting on my waist slowly slid downward.
Every hair on my body stood on end. Even if he promised to make me Grand Empress Dowager, I still couldn’t endure this!
I grabbed Qi Sheng’s hand in return.
Qi Sheng’s slightly narrowed eyes trembled faintly, and I saw his dark pupils contract rapidly.
I suddenly realized something was off. His hand had only slid downward but hadn’t started squeezing or groping, this wasn’t normal!
I’d been a man for more than twenty years; how could I not understand a man’s intentions? If Qi Sheng were truly overcome by lust, this wouldn’t be his reaction!
My heart jolted, and I instantly understood. My mind began racing, if I really were a woman, how should I react in this situation?
I quickly ran through scenes of teasing my former girlfriend.
The first time I teased Little Li, she slapped me twice and cursed, “You hooligan!”
I glanced at Qi Sheng, no way I dared slap him.
Pass!
The second time I teased Little Li, her face turned red, and she looked at me shyly.
I looked again at Qi Sheng’s square, masculine face. Leaving aside that “blushing” itself was technically difficult, asking me to gaze affectionately at a grown man made me want to die.
Pass again!
The third time I teased Little Li, well, actually that was a misunderstanding. I didn’t intend to tease her; I was just walking behind her and accidentally brushed against her backside. She turned around and said coyly, “So naughty! Why are you touching my butt?”
Even now, remembering that tone still made me shiver.
Qi Sheng wrapped his other arm around me and asked softly, “What’s wrong? Cold?”
I decided it would be better to stay reserved.
I pushed him away and said seriously, “Please respect me!”
Qi Sheng froze. He looked at me, then glanced downward.
Following his gaze, I realized one of my hands was still pressing rather boldly at the root of his thigh.
I immediately lifted my hand, sat upright, and said very solemnly, “Although this body once belonged to your Crown Princess, I still retain some memories from my previous life. You know that immortals value abstinence and purity, free of desire and passion, so…”
I didn’t finish, only glanced at Qi Sheng.
Qi Sheng curved his lips in a faint smile, propped himself halfway up, and twirled a strand of my hair around his finger. In a low, ambiguous voice he said, “But your performance last time didn’t seem very abstinent or pure…”
I truly, truly wanted to strangle this man!
I took a deep breath and kept smiling without speaking.
Qi Sheng leaned close to my ear again and murmured, “Besides, if we don’t perform the duties of husband and wife, how will you conceive an imperial heir?”
Perform the duties of husband and wife? My head throbbed with bulging veins. I wanted to kill him first and talk later, but just as my fist lifted, I caught sight of his half-smiling expression, and my mind instantly cooled.
He’s deliberately provoking me!
I won’t fall for it. I absolutely won’t!
I repeated this to myself, then grabbed the front of my clothing, pulled it open, and, like someone going to their execution, fell backward onto the blanket with eyes closed, declaring resolutely: “Go ahead!”
Qi Sheng didn’t move for a long time. I opened one eye slightly to peek at him.
Well then! His face was as dark as the bottom of a pot.
I quickly added fuel to the fire: “Your Highness isn’t going to perform the duties of husband and wife anymore?”
Good, now his face was even darker.
Qi Sheng said nothing. After a moment of silence, he suddenly called loudly, “Stop the carriage!”
The carriage halted smoothly. Without another word, Qi Sheng got down and left.
I sat up, feeling extremely pleased. Hah, trying to compete with me in shamelessness? You’re still too inexperienced.
Luli lifted the carriage curtain and entered. When she saw me clearly, she suddenly gasped and rushed forward, whispering, “Niang Niang, what happened to you?”
While adjusting my clothes, I lectured Luli, “Luli, let me tell you, never undress too quickly in front of men. Half-hidden, half-revealed, advancing yet retreating, that’s just right!”
But Luli kept her head lowered, silently helping me straighten my clothing.
I felt puzzled and turned to look at her, only to see her eyes had turned red again.
I sighed helplessly. “Luli, what is it this time?”
Luli bit her lip. After a long pause she finally said, “Niang Niang is so gentle and obedient, yet still cannot please His Highness the Crown Prince. This servant feels wronged for you.”
Gentle and obedient? Me? Or the former Lady Zhang? Neither sounded reliable!
I carefully studied Luli’s expression, it looked natural, not like flattery or lying.
Ahhh, just what kind of worldview does this girl have?
