“Why is Brother Bai still sleeping?”
“He seems unwell. I’ve taken a leave for him. Let’s go.”
The door closed, plunging the small room back into darkness.
Gu Yuanbai opened his eyes under the covers, staring blankly at the ceiling.
The feeling of dying in Xue Yuan’s arms still lingered, Xue Yuan’s hot tears on his face, his choked sobs in his ears. Gu Yuanbai looked at him with his last bit of consciousness, then woke up in his dormitory the next moment.
Not at the moment of plummeting through the clouds, but back to his university days, younger.
As if everything he experienced was just a dream.
The dorm door opened again. His roommate, speaking with a Beijing accent, walked in, “I have no classes today. If you feel unwell, I’ll go to the hospital with you.”
Gu Yuanbai extended a hand from the dark bed, “Give me a cigarette.”
Ten minutes later, on the dorm balcony.
Gu Yuanbai leaned against the wall, smoking silently, looking dejected.
Roommate Little Four watched him for a while, puzzled, “What’s up with you?”
Gu Yuanbai didn’t reply.
Little Four looked him up and down, “Seriously, Brother Bai, how can you look so cool just smoking?”
“Wait, I’ll grab my phone and take a photo. Don’t move.” Footsteps retreated.
Gu Yuanbai’s hand trembled slightly as he took a deep drag, feeling the smoke in his lungs clearly. The bruises on his arm from pinching himself further confirmed the reality of the moment.
Was it all just a dream? Graduation, the future, skydiving, and Great Heng—all a dream?
Impossible.
Gu Yuanbai’s hand shook more. Little Four was startled by his trembling hand when he returned, hurriedly extinguishing the cigarette, dragging him down the stairs, “Hurry, to the hospital!”
Gu Yuanbai, being dragged down the stairs, saw the white walls and corridors spinning. The first thing he did upon returning was search online for “Quan Chen” and the original “The Jade in the Palm of the Regent’s Hand.” But none of these books or the web drama adaptation existed.
Nothing at all. If the book didn’t exist, did that mean there was no Great Heng, no Gu Lian, no Xue Yuan?
Gu Yuanbai dared not confirm it.
If everything that had happened before was real, living an extra lifetime and returning to find himself younger should have been a pleasant surprise, but Gu Yuanbai didn’t want this surprise. Not only did he not want it, but he was also even afraid.
So afraid that his lips were trembling in the middle of summer, pale and bloodless. His roommate was already so scared that he ran to the street to hail a car.
He had died but didn’t die, so what about Xue Yuan?
Xue Yuan followed him in death. What would he do if he didn’t see him alone in the afterlife?
Gu Yuanbai’s mind was buzzing, and only the smell of smoke could keep him somewhat clear-headed. He took the cigarette from his roommate’s hand, pushed aside the doctor in front of him, and squatted down in the smoking area.
Little Four ran out after him, “D*mn it, Brother Bai, can’t you listen to the doctor?”
“Listen to what?” Gu Yuanbai pulled at his lips, “What can a blood test and an X-ray do? My problem is mental. I just need to calm down.”
Little Four thought for a moment and squatted down beside him, “Alright. But you need to tell me, what exactly is going on with you?”
Gu Yuanbai held the cigarette between his fingers, looking down at his hand.
Long, with prominent joints and glossy skin, it looked strong and youthful.
This was not the hand of an old man, nor was it the fair and slender hand of the young emperor.
“I lost my love.” He finally tightened his hand and turned his head to say this to Little Four.
***
Gu Yuanbai locked himself in a hotel room for three days, eventually being dragged out by his roommates.
He looked somewhat lethargic. Old Zhu slapped him on the back, mercilessly mocking, “Gu Yuanbai, you actually have a day where you get dumped?”
“So what if you got dumped? How can you be so wasted? You look worse than someone who just got dumped,” another roommate guessed, rubbing his chin, “Were you cheated on? Got dumped? How good must the other person be to dump you?”
Gu Yuanbai gave them a light glance, and Old Zhu and the other roommate instinctively stood up straight, “My bad!”
They felt a bit embarrassed, thinking it was too cowardly.
Gu Yuanbai retracted his gaze, his handsome face exuding a sense of decay. The roommates exchanged looks and tried to talk about interesting things at school, then suddenly mentioned, “A student from the sports department next door fainted a few days ago. When he woke up, he didn’t know what had happened and was clamoring to drop out.”
Everyone lost interest, “Did he drop out?”
“He didn’t manage to drop out,” the roommate said, “But it seems like he had some mental issues. The school is planning to give him a one- to two-month break.”
Gu Yuanbai wasn’t interested, “Where to?”
Little Four grinned, “CS real combat club.”
***
Gu Yuanbai was dressed in camouflage, with his pants tucked into his combat boots. He carried a paintball gun and walked out from the midst of gunfire, his black hair drenched in sweat, his sharp eyebrows and eyes tinged with the smell of gunpowder, and his entire body spotless, without a trace of paintball.
“Impressive,” a club staff member handed him water and a towel with a smile, “Great performance. Want to take a shower and rest first?”
Gu Yuanbai lowered his head, unfastening the black gloves on his hands, his jawline sharp and clean, his eyebrows shaded, speaking without a hint of happiness despite his good performance, “First, give me a pack of cigarettes.”
The CS combat base was located in the suburbs, surrounded by trees, giving it a forest-like feel. Gu Yuanbai was fully immersed in the game, venting all his resentment and pain through running and shooting paintballs. Now, he was drenched in sweat.
In the heat, he pulled out a cigarette from the pack, looked around, and was led to a smoking area by a staff member.
Gu Yuanbai had been to this club before, but after spending decades in the Great Heng, these small memories had long been forgotten. Even his roommates’ faces seemed unfamiliar to him now.
Thinking about this, he furrowed his brows and silently placed the cigarette in his mouth.
The smoking area was next to the staff area. Gu Yuanbai, with a cold face, smoked half a cigarette. Occasionally turning his head, he saw someone bending over to place down sandbags in the staff area.
This person looked young but had strong and powerful muscles. He wore a white tank top, stained with sweat and work, not looking dirty but full of masculine charm, the overwhelming pheromones enough to make one blush.
Gu Yuanbai stubbed out his cigarette and looked away. The staff member glanced over and chuckled, “That’s our club’s new temporary worker, a local university student. He’s young but very imposing. When he arrived yesterday, we thought he was here to cause trouble, even the security guards were about to step in. But I have to say, this guy is really capable. He handled dozens of sandbags in no time.”
Gu Yuanbai responded casually, hands in his pockets, looking at the scenery outside, thinking that if Xue Yuan were here, Xue Yuan would be just as capable.
With this thought, the pain he had just vented surged back. Unable to hide his irritation, he rubbed his temples and strode toward the lounge, the sound of his combat boots echoing loudly.
This customer seemed hard to deal with, his imposing manner daunting. The staff member’s voice trembled after a few words and didn’t dare follow. Idle, he walked to the work area and chatted with the person moving the sandbags, “Dude, you’re working too hard. Others take three days to finish the work you’ve done today. Are you really that short on money?”
The temp worker had a very handsome face, almost flirtatious. Coupled with his perfect physique, the staff member couldn’t help but click his tongue. If he were short on money, wouldn’t it be easy? Just standing shirtless on the street, he’d have rich ladies flocking to him.
“I need money,” the temp worker drank some water, sweat sliding down his strong neck, his eyes deep as if looking through the walls to the distance, “I need to go somewhere far.”
He needed money to buy equipment, to buy a plane ticket.
He was going to dig up Gu Yuanbai’s tomb from his past life.
Go find his lover.
***
The roommates did their best to take Gu Yuanbai out for a day, but a person with a broken heart is terrifying. One second he would show a hint of a smile, and the next, his face would sink. The roommates gave up completely and took him to a bar in the evening. They sat him down on a stool at the bar and said, “Brother Bai, this is the last activity. Drink to forget your sorrows. Drink as much as you want. We’re going to have fun, and if you’re not drunk when we come back, we’ll make sure you get there.”
Gu Yuanbai sat on the stool, slightly hunched, with colorful lights casting on his face. He nodded casually, “Go ahead.”
The roommates left after reminding him a few times. As they were about to enter the dance floor, one of them turned around and sighed, “Brother Bai is getting more attractive.”
Old Zhu turned his head at the comment, “Attractively scary? Every time I see his cold face now, I get chills. Can heartbreak really have such power?”
Little Four shook his head with his hands behind his back and said solemnly, “The wise do not fall in love. Love affects Brother Bai’s speed in drawing his gun. It’s not worth it.”
The roommates exchanged glances and then all surged into the dance floor.
At the bar, Gu Yuanbai ordered a few bottles of alcohol and sipped them slowly. He didn’t have a habit of smoking or drinking, things that could numb his nerves had never fascinated him, but these past few days had been so frustrating and complicated that this seemed like the only way to feel a little better.
After a while, the bartender handed him a drink and indicated to the left with a smile, “Sir, this drink is from that gentleman…”
“I don’t want it,” Gu Yuanbai leaned against the bar, tapping the table with a commanding tone, “Send it back.”
The bartender tensed up instinctively, “Yes!”
Cold sweat broke out on his forehead as he picked up the drink. Why did he feel an urge to kneel and bow to this guest?
Gu Yuanbai sat quietly, watching the vibrant lights around him. Modern entertainment was incomparable to ancient times, but he felt lonely and empty.
His soul was hollow, disconnected from everything.
Unable to resist, he took out a cigarette from the pack. Twirling it between his fingers, Gu Yuanbai seemed lost in thought. He took a deep breath and held the cigarette in his mouth, not intending to light it.
Today had been enough. Maintaining his health was something deeply ingrained in him.
Someone approached him from the left, speaking with a pleasant voice, “Hey handsome, didn’t like the drink I sent you?”
Gu Yuanbai bit the cigarette, the end pointing defiantly at the newcomer. He responded impatiently, “Get lost.”
The person’s smile turned awkward for a moment, “Don’t be like that, let’s just chat…”
Suddenly, the sound of a glass shattering came from behind the bar.
Gu Yuanbai turned to look and only saw a glimpse of black trousers. He squinted and took the cigarette out of his mouth.
The bar’s security uniforms were all black, and in such places, security personnel were required to be good-looking and at least 1.8 meters tall. Gu Yuanbai hadn’t clearly seen the security guard who broke the glass, but he seemed tall and handsome.
His indifferent demeanor finally made the person trying to strike up a conversation back off. Gu Yuanbai took a sip of his drink, listening to the scolding happening at the nearby corner.
The bartender was angrily scolding someone: “You’ve only been working here for two days and already broken five glasses. Dude, do you even want your salary?”
The other person didn’t say a word.
The bartender’s tone suddenly turned a bit timid but still tried to maintain authority: “…Forget it. I’ll tell the manager to deduct the cost of the glasses from your pay. If you’re done for the day, just leave.”
After a while, the bartender and the security guard came out from around the corner. Gu Yuanbai glanced up casually. The security guard was taller and more handsome than he had imagined. With sharp features, even in his security uniform, he looked like he was wearing an expensive suit. His broad frame filled out the clothes, and his looks were the type that attracted attention in places of entertainment and nightlife.
He looked somewhat familiar.
It was the temp worker from the CS combat club that morning.
