If I Can’t Get the Male Lead, I’ll Just Be a Salted Fish Chapter 51

The heating in Starbucks was cranked up high. Hehe and a few core club members each ordered a coffee, sitting at a table by the floor-to-ceiling window to discuss the matter of the club’s twice-a-semester team-building events.

Strictly speaking, there was no need to gather people in person for this. From past experience, all she had to do was come up with two or three options and toss them into the group chat for a vote. But this time the event was also meant to celebrate Xu Ning’s birthday, so she felt it necessary to ask the person involved for his opinion. And then there was her own selfish reason—after being tormented bald by final exams, she urgently needed to feast her eyes on her male god for nourishment.

The school’s two male gods were sitting right across from her, and on top of that, Wang Youyu—also a bona fide heartthrob. She felt a little floaty. Looking at Xie Lanzhi and Xu Ning sitting shoulder to shoulder, she couldn’t help but think: if she were still a “LanNing” shipper, she’d probably have screamed and fainted on the spot. But she wasn’t anymore.

—Those two had absolutely zero CP vibe. Even through the eyes of a diehard shipper, all you’d see was “we just happen to know each other.” Shipping them was honestly worse than shipping Voldemort with Lin Daiyu.

No, the sweet one was still “LanShu,” but sadly they hadn’t dropped any sugar lately. And even if they had, she wouldn’t know.

Hehe set aside her little thoughts for now and asked, “So what do you guys think?”

She had found a party house not far from campus. Inside there were all sorts of board games, a mini cinema, an e-sports room, console games, an escape room, plus food and drinks—enough to keep a group entertained for half a day.

Wang Youyu looked at Xu Ning and said gently, “It’s your birthday. What do you think?”

Xu Ning said helplessly, “It’s just a birthday. There’s really no need to make a big fuss.” He paused. “Honestly, I could spend it on my own.”

Hehe grinned. “Don’t feel pressured, Xu Ning. Think of it as an early Christmas party, and we’ll just celebrate your birthday along the way.”

Xu Ning smiled. “I don’t really mind—whatever you guys decide is fine. Can we bring friends?”

“Of course you can.” Hehe said meaningfully, “Didn’t you all bring friends last time? They’re welcome again this time.”

Xie Lanzhi asked, “No overnight stay?”

“Huh? You want to stay overnight? But it’s exam month—lots of people still have exams the next morning.”

Xie Lanzhi nodded, saying no more.

Hehe clapped her hands together. “Then it’s settled! Thank you three for squeezing time out of your busy schedules to attend this meeting~ But wait, is it raining outside? Did you bring umbrellas?”

Obviously not. Even though the sky had been gloomy all day, knowing it might rain but still not bringing an umbrella was practically a university student’s survival skill.

“Looks freezing out there. Who knows when the rain will stop.” Hehe, however, was in no hurry—surrounded by three handsome guys, this was the pinnacle of life.

“In winter, once it starts raining, it doesn’t stop anytime soon,” Wang Youyu said.

Xu Ning sighed. “Great, now my sketching assignment’s going to be delayed again.”

Wang Youyu stood up. “I’ll go buy you an umbrella. Wait here.”

Before Xu Ning could refuse, a sudden knock sounded on the window. All four turned their heads. Rain had laid a blurry filter over the glass, through which the hazy outline of a boy appeared.

Xu Ning’s eyes lit up at once, his beauty blooming like spring, instantly making everyone except Xie Lanzhi look like random extras.

Chu Cheng smiled at Xu Ning, but when he saw Squid King sitting beside him, his smile turned into a smirk. Carrying two umbrellas, he walked into Starbucks. Xu Ning asked with a smile, “What brings you here?”

Chu Cheng first cast a dismissive glance at his rival, then said, “Just happened to be passing by.”

Xie Lanzhi said coolly, “Passing by with two umbrellas in hand?”

Chu Cheng’s expression shifted. He pulled Xie Lanzhi aside and muttered, “Brother Lan, don’t say out loud what you can clearly see through.”

“You think the others haven’t noticed?”

Wang Youyu pushed up his glasses, smiling. “Two umbrellas for five people still won’t cut it. I’ll go buy another one.”

Hehe was so excited she downed the rest of her coffee in one gulp—what a full-on love polygon scene, and she was here for it!

“Go ahead, nobody’s stopping you.” Chu Cheng handed one umbrella to Xie Lanzhi. “Brother Lan, here. Could you please walk senior sister back?”

Hehe was flustered by the honor. “N-no need, I’d like to stay here a bit longer. Plus, my friend’s bringing me an umbrella later. You guys go ahead, don’t worry about me.” Send her back with Xie Lanzhi? She wasn’t worthy! “But hey, where’s Qin Shu? Doesn’t he know we’re here?”

Xie Lanzhi turned to Chu Cheng, also waiting for his answer.

“Of course he knows,” Chu Cheng said, looking puzzled. “But come on, it’s just delivering an umbrella. Why would it take two people?”

Xie Lanzhi raised a brow. “Fair point.”

Once sure Hehe wasn’t coming along, the four boys stepped out of Starbucks. Outside was wet and cold, Wang Youyu’s glasses instantly fogging over. The area was low-lying, and water had already pooled at the entrance. Chu Cheng glanced at Xu Ning’s white sneakers and said, “Want me to carry you back to campus?”

Xu Ning: “…”

Wang Youyu: “…”

Xie Lanzhi: Heh.

Chu Cheng bent down in front of Xu Ning. “Come on, get on.”

“Chu Cheng,” Xu Ning said with a laugh, “I really don’t think you can carry me.”

Chu Cheng scoffed. “What the h*ll are you talking about, with those skinny arms and legs of yours? I could carry you on my back for eight hundred meters without breaking a sweat.”

“Don’t joke around, Chu Cheng,” Wang Youyu said in a low voice. “It’s still a bit of a distance from here to campus.”

“Who’s joking? Just because you can’t doesn’t mean other people can’t, okay?” Chu Cheng urged, “Xu Ning, hurry up.”

Xu Ning was half laughing, half exasperated. “Not happening.”

“Then what if your shoes get wet?”

“No big deal, I’ll just change when I get back.”

Chu Cheng was still unwilling to give up. “But I want to carry you.”

Xu Ning froze for a second, then reached out to ruffle his sharp-cropped hair in a soothing way. “Then wait until we’re somewhere less crowded, okay?”

Xie Lanzhi had no patience to watch this elementary-school level love rivalry. He turned to Wang Youyu. “Shall we go? Let’s buy an umbrella first.”

The atmosphere between Xu Ning and Chu Cheng was impenetrable, leaving the others shut out. Wang Youyu felt a wave of helplessness and pressed his lips together. “You really don’t care at all?”

Xie Lanzhi: “Hm?”

Wang Youyu said bitterly, “Xu Ning and Chu Cheng.”

Xie Lanzhi looked puzzled. “Why should I care about them?”

Wang Youyu hesitated over his wording. “Qin Shu said, you and Xu Ning…”

“Brother Lan!” Chu Cheng suddenly cut him off. “Aren’t we leaving yet?”

“Coming.” Xie Lanzhi asked Wang Youyu, “What did Qin Shu say?”

Just as Wang Youyu was about to reply, the honk of a car horn drew their attention.

A car with its hazards flashing slowly pulled over at the roadside. At a glance, Xie Lanzhi recognized it as his own. Watching his car inch forward, finally sliding into a parking space, his lips curved faintly. Handing the umbrella to Wang Youyu, he said, “I’ve got a ride too.”

Chu Cheng was baffled. “Wait, isn’t that Brother Lan’s car? And isn’t Qin Shu the one driving… what the—? What’s that supposed to mean!” Suddenly, trudging over on foot to pick someone up felt completely lacking in style.

Xu Ning opened his umbrella and leaned a little closer to Chu Cheng. “Don’t worry about them. They have their happiness, we have ours.”

Wang Youyu: …And what about my happiness?

It was Qin Shu’s first time driving in the rain. At first, he fumbled forever just trying to find the windshield wiper switch, but things went smoothly afterward. Once he parked, he pulled out his phone to message Xie Lanzhi—only for Xie Lanzhi’s WeChat to pop up first: 【Open the door.】

Qin Shu blinked, lifted his head, and sure enough saw a tall, slender figure through the window.

Xie Lanzhi wasn’t holding an umbrella. Qin Shu hurriedly leaned over to push open the passenger-side door. Amid the magnified sound of pouring rain, Xie Lanzhi slid in and shut the door, muting the noise again.

Qin Shu gave a stiff smile. “Brother, I came to pick you up.”

Noticing Qin Shu was a bit damp, Xie Lanzhi reached out and touched his hair—it was icy cold. “Why’d you get caught in the rain?”

“The dorm’s a ways from the parking lot,” Qin Shu said gloomily. “And my umbrella got taken by Chu Cheng.”

Xie Lanzhi: “No wonder he had two umbrellas.”

Qin Shu complained, “I tried to stop him, but he runs too fast. No surprise for someone who hits the gym three times a week. Can’t mess with that, nope, I back off.”

Xie Lanzhi looked at him. “Chu Cheng already came to deliver an umbrella. Why did you bother coming?”

Qin Shu gripped the steering wheel tightly. “He can pick Ningning up. You… you should be picked up by me.”

Xie Lanzhi chuckled. “Fair enough.”

“Then let’s go.” Qin Shu kept his eyes forward, shifted gears, and started driving. “I’ll take you home.”

Xie Lanzhi’s place wasn’t far—normally just a few minutes’ drive. Luckily, the rain had traffic backed up, so Qin Shu drove extra slowly. When they reached a red light, he actually felt a little secretly grateful.

They stopped. Qin Shu still had his foot on the brake, hand resting on the gear stick. Seeing the countdown show a full hundred seconds left, Xie Lanzhi said, “Put on the handbrake.”

“Huh?” Qin Shu hadn’t reacted.

Xie Lanzhi covered Qin Shu’s hand with his own, guiding it to the handbrake. “Too long. No need to keep your foot on the pedal.”

Xie Lanzhi’s hand was cold, but it sent a jolt of electricity through Qin Shu.

Qin Shu exhaled, forcing himself to focus on the road. “…Okay.”

For convenience, Qin Shu drove straight into the underground garage and parked close to the elevator. “Brother, we’re here.”

Xie Lanzhi unbuckled his seatbelt, but didn’t get out. Qin Shu’s cheeks flamed.

It was here—awkward yet long-awaited alone time.

Now even the sound of rain was gone. The car was silent, save for the low hum of the heater.

“How’s your revision going?” Xie Lanzhi asked.

“…” Why bring up studying at a time like this, d*mn it. He felt completely deflated.

Slumping against the steering wheel, Qin Shu groaned, “Not great. I might really end up flunking with Chu Cheng. Especially Compiler Theory—I already tanked the midterm…”

“You won’t fail,” Xie Lanzhi said.

Qin Shu pulled a face like, Yeah right, you’re just saying that to comfort me. “Really? I don’t believe it.”

“Really.”

“Why?”

“Because you have a boyfriend.”

And this was the importance of confessing—because Xie Lanzhi was his boyfriend. His boyfriend!!!

When the top student boyfriend said he wouldn’t fail, Qin Shu believed it!

His eyes sparkled. “Will my boyfriend teach me?”

“I’ll teach you,” Xie Lanzhi said. “And I’ll hold you too.”

During midterms, Qin Shu had tried superstitious methods—hugging Conan, hugging his top student crush—but still flunked. Maybe hugs weren’t enough; he probably needed… other things.

Heh. Men. Once in love, their heads filled with nothing but dirty thoughts. He wondered if Xie Lanzhi thought the same.

Glancing at him, Qin Shu saw his bangs damp from the rain, making his eyes look even deeper and more captivating. Hard to imagine someone like Xie Lanzhi—perfect like a two-dimensional character—harboring the same filthy thoughts as any normal guy.

Maybe Lu Rulu was right. Until something truly intimate happened, having a boyfriend like this didn’t even feel real.

“What are you thinking?” Xie Lanzhi asked, leaning sideways, his voice tinged with lazy weariness.

Of course Qin Shu couldn’t admit he was thinking about intimacy. He wasn’t only after Xie Lanzhi’s body. He thought for a moment, then whispered, “About exams and… my boyfriend.”

Xie Lanzhi’s breath caught. The heater was up a little too high, so he turned it down.

Qin Shu scrambled for words. “Brother, are you warm?”

“Mm, a little.” Xie Lanzhi said, “There’s an umbrella in the trunk. Don’t get rained on when you head back.”

Qin Shu deflated. Was Lanzhi trying to send him off?

Even if they couldn’t be alone for long, Qin Shu still wanted more time with him. But since he’d said so… well, okay.

“Got it, Brother. You go up. Say hi to Snowball for me.”

Xie Lanzhi was quiet for a moment, then said, “Snowball just learned to hop on one foot. Want to come to my place and see?”

Qin Shu: “???”

Author’s note: Snowball: “???”