Cheng Fang, will you marry me?
The courtyard fell silent. Seeing the little maid’s astonished expression, Duke Jin’an took another step forward.
“Cheng Fang, will you marry me?” he repeated, open and at ease.
He really was saying those words.
It seemed Duke Jin’an had also learned about the Gao family using the Empress Dowager to force the marriage.
Ban Qin snapped out of her daze, her expression somewhat complicated.
It wasn’t the sentence itself that surprised her – in the past few days, three people had already said similar things. Of course, whether it was the Gao family, Qin Shi’san-lang, or Master Zhou, they had all spoken in a roundabout, tactful way.
Still, no matter what, the fact that so many people were thinking of her lady and wanting to help her out of this predicament was something to be happy about.
Cheng Jiao-niang gave a slight smile and bowed in thanks.
“Your Highness has gone to such trouble. This is a small matter, there’s no need to…,” she began.
“What are you thinking?” Duke Jin’an cut her off with a laugh. “How could this possibly be a small matter?”
Of course it wasn’t a small matter, Ban Qin sighed inwardly.
“Have you forgotten? I told you before – when you’re ready to marry, I’ll help you make inquiries and choose.”
After they sat down in the main hall, Ban Qin served the tea and withdrew to the side. Duke Jin’an continued speaking.
That was three years ago, wasn’t it?
Even Ban Qin felt a bit dazed remembering it. At that time, she had just returned to her lady’s side, and the Cheng and Zhou families were scheming over her lady’s marriage. When her lady spoke of it with calm grace, the young man leaning over the courtyard wall had also spoken those words with the same ease – earnest and full of enthusiasm.
“If you can’t make up your mind, or it’s hard for you to ask around, then come ask me. I’ll look into everything clearly for you, and I guarantee those matchmakers won’t fool you.”
Cheng Jiao-niang smiled and nodded.
“I remember,” she said.
“I’ve thought it over seriously,” Duke Jin’an said with a laugh. “Thought and thought, picked and compared, and in the end… I still think I’m the most suitable.”
Cheng Jiao-niang smiled again.
“Anyone would be suitable,” she said. “It’s just a small matter – no need for your concern.”
“Cheng Fang, I’m not here to help you,” Duke Jin’an said.
Ban Qin looked up at him.
He’s not?
“Of course, I know about this whole business of marriage negotiations you’ve been going through,” Duke Jin’an continued. “I know there are quite a few people who want to marry you. So I gave it some serious thought. Whether they’re suitable or not, good or not – that’s not for me to judge. It’s for you to judge and decide, since you’re the one who has to live the life.”
Cheng Jiao-niang watched him with a faint smile, saying nothing.
“This is your matter, something you have the right to decide for yourself – so where would ‘helping’ even come into it?” Duke Jin’an said with a laugh.
Cheng Jiao-niang smiled and bowed again.
“So,” Duke Jin’an continued, “I’m here to propose.”
Ban Qin was a little stunned, feeling as if her mind had gone blurry again.
So… she still didn’t understand what these people were saying to each other.
“After I heard about everything that’s been happening, I thought and thought, and in the end, the person I kept coming back to was myself,” Duke Jin’an said, looking at the girl before him.
It was midday in summer, the sunlight bright. Yet no matter how bright it was, when it fell on her, it seemed to soften, as though its brilliance had been tucked away.
Her clothing never seemed to change – whether on the night they first met or now, she always wore a plain-colored, chest-high skirt. In winter she would add a dark outer coat; in the heat, a light gauze half-sleeve.
She wore no ornaments. A touch of powder on her lips, her ink-black hair pinned up high with an old wooden hairpin, a small silver comb tucked at the side – so simple that even the maid beside her was more adorned.
She stood with perfect composure, her bearing so proper that even the most impeccable palace women could find no fault with it.
She always stood like this – even that night by the bonfire, surrounded by wolves in the valley – quiet, calm, looking at the world’s good and bad, its dangers and beauties, its gains and losses…
Fang Bocong, don’t be sad.
For some reason, thinking of those words filled him with a deep, quiet peace.
There were two people in this world who had ever wished for him not to be sad. One was already gone, never to return.
And this one… this one was about to become another man’s wife. From now on, the man standing at her side would never again be him.
That was something he did not dare – and could not bear – to imagine.
Duke Jin’an took another step forward.
“I thought about myself – I want to marry Cheng Fang, not anyone else. Me.” He placed a hand over his own heart and said earnestly, “Fang Bocong wants to marry Cheng Fang.”
Fang Bocong wants to marry Cheng Fang.
Ban Qin, standing to the side, stared blankly, dazed all over again.
She had never imagined that a woman’s marriage proposal could look like this.
In the bloom of youth, a procession in red stretched ten miles – this was supposed to be the best moment of a woman’s life. When speaking of marriage, some young women were shy and bashful, some bright and hopeful. Parents were solemn, torn between choices, carefully selecting; sometimes reluctant to part with a daughter they raised, sometimes delighted at a niece or daughter coming of age.
But none of these natural, universally understood things had ever happened to her lady.
Her marriage had been treated as a transaction, a matter of control, of maneuvering, of pressure, of entrapment. Even those who expressed an intention to marry her did so by analyzing the present, the future, what should be done, what could be done.
No joy, no comfort, no tender reluctance – only panic, fear, unease, calculations, retreat and advance, and weighing of advantage.
I myself want to marry Cheng Fang.
Just himself – because he wants to.
For no reason at all, Ban Qin felt her nose sting with the threat of tears.
“Cheng Fang, regarding your marriage – have you made a decision?”
Duke Jin’an’s voice sounded beside her, and Ban Qin came back to herself, lifting her head to look at Cheng Jiao-niang.
Cheng Jiao-niang shook her head.
“I truly haven’t given such a small matter any thought,” she said.
“This – this is a small matter in your eyes?” Duke Jin’an asked, his eyes lighting up.
Cheng Jiao-niang nodded.
“That’s wonderful,” Duke Jin’an said with a smile.
Wonderful?
This person was really quite something. Ban Qin glanced Duke Jin’an again.
Her lady had said many times that marriage was a small matter. Those who heard it either didn’t believe her, didn’t approve, or felt helpless pity. Someone who thought it was good – truly good – was a first.
And he wasn’t just saying it. His whole expression was bright with delight; it was clear he genuinely felt it from the bottom of his heart.
Cheng Jiao-niang seemed a little surprised as well.
“How is it good?” she asked.
Duke Jin’an smiled.
“To me, marriage is something very, very important in my life. There have been too many things I’ve had no choice about, too many things beyond my control. Only this – this marriage, the person I will spend my life with – I truly, truly want to decide for myself. Cheng Fang, I want to spend my life with you.” His eyes were bright as he spoke. “Since this is a small matter to you, something unimportant… then could you use this thing that is unimportant to you, to fulfill the most important thing in my entire life?”
Use what is unimportant to you to fulfill what is most important in my life.
Ban Qin stared at him in a daze again.
Is… is that allowed? Can it really work like that?
Cheng Jiao-niang looked at him.
“All right,” she said, nodding.
All right…
Ban Qin turned to look at her again, stunned.
So – it can be like this.
This… this… what kind of situation is this?
“This is what you call making a vow with your lord.”
By the bright lamplight in the room, the maid murmured softly.
“Sister,” Ban Qin hurried forward a few steps, anxious and flustered. “This matter… did it really happen? Is it truly settled?”
“He proposed?” the maid asked, looking at Ban Qin.
Ban Qin nodded.
Duke Jin’an had already taken his leave. Noon had turned to evening, and even after explaining everything again to the maid who had returned from her errands, Ban Qin still felt dazed, as if dreaming.
“He did. He said he wished to marry my lady,” Ban Qin said.
“And did Miss accept?” the maid asked.
Ban Qin nodded again.
“Miss said, ‘All right.’”
The maid spread her hands.
“Then there you have it. Why are you still asking?” she said.
“So…Miss is really going to marry Duke Jin’an?” Ban Qin said, still unable to believe it.
“Miss has never once gone back on her word,” the maid said with a smile.
Yes – when her lady said something, it was true. She never deceived.
Ban Qin clasped her hands, dazed.
“It’s the Duke…” she murmured. “He’s… stronger than Young Master Gao, right?”
The maid reached out and flicked her on the forehead.
“Whether it’s a duke, or the highest in the land, or a young master from a princess’s manor, or a childhood sweetheart,” she said, “it doesn’t matter who’s ‘impressive.’ What matters is that Miss is the one who decides.”
Ban Qin’s head tilted from the flick, and she covered her forehead with a little yelp of “Sister!”
“Stop daydreaming. Go prepare the wedding clothes,” the maid said.
Wedding clothes…
She’s getting married…
My lady is getting married…
My lady is also someone who will marry…
With a sudden wail, Ban Qin covered her face and burst into tears.
The maid was exasperated and amused all at once, but seeing Ban Qin hide her face, she also felt a bit sore-hearted.
“All right, all right – it’s a joyous occasion, what are you crying for?” she coaxed.
Ban Qin ignored her and simply sat down, covering her face.
In the night, her muffled sobs drifted through the doors and windows, lingering in the courtyard.
The sky was bright, and hurried footsteps echoed outside Gao Lingjun’s hall.
“Father, Father, something terrible has happened!”
Young Master Gao hurried in as he spoke.
Gao Lingjun was being dressed by two beautiful maids. Upon hearing this, he did not even lift his eyebrows.
“Yesterday, Duke Jin’an went to that wretched Cheng girl’s house…” Young Master Gao continued.
“First of all, this is not what we call ‘something terrible.’ Secondly…” Gao Lingjun turned to him, raising his eyebrows sternly, “your wife is not a wretched girl.”
Young Master Gao lowered his head nervously under his father’s gaze.
“Yes, Father, I spoke out of turn,” he said, then quickly looked up again. “These past few days, that Cheng… Lady Cheng’s house has also been visited by Qin Shi’san. Since Qin Shi’san helped mediate between her and me, we can overlook his visit. But Duke Jin’an went to Lady Cheng – who knows what they were discussing…”
“What they say is their business. We only need to do what we must.” Gao Lingjun straightened his robes. “Prepare the carriage.”
Prepare the carriage?
“Father, are you really going to her house?” Young Master Gao said. “Just summon her to come see you.”
“Right now, we are the ones asking a favor of her, not the other way around. Should we really wait for her to come to us?” Gao Lingjun said leisurely.
How is this us asking a favor from her?
Young Master Gao strongly disagreed and was about to speak when someone hurried in from outside.
“Master,” the man said, handing over a letter. “From the palace.”
Gao Lingjun reached out and took it. After a glance, his expression shifted slightly.
“Father, what is it?” Young Master Gao asked urgently.
Gao Lingjun smoothed his robes and sat down, tucking the letter away.
“There’s no need to prepare the carriage,” he said.
“What?” Young Master Gao was momentarily confused. Why call off the carriage? Were they not going anymore?
“There’s no need to go,” Gao Lingjun said, his tone calm and unchanged from before, his demeanor having returned to normal. “Duke Jin’an has just requested His Majesty’s permission to marry Lady Cheng.”
What?
Young Master Gao stared wide-eyed, unable to believe it.
First, there was that childhood friend from the Zhou family, whose betrothal had been rumored for two years, and now Duke Jin’an suddenly appears? He even went directly to the Emperor?
One after another, they’re all jumping out to publicly humiliate me! Do they really hold such a grudge?
