“The Madam is back.”
Outside the door came the collective sound of maids curtseying.
Duke Jin’an immediately straightened his posture, but upon hearing footsteps approaching the door, he quickly settled back against the armrest, focusing intently on the teacup in his hand.
“…Would you like supper now?”
It was Su Xin’s voice asking.
“Has His Highness eaten?” Cheng Jiao-niang’s voice sounded in the room.
Duke Jin’an looked up.
He saw the girl standing in the room, already changed into casual home attire – a skirt and an overcoat. Though the overcoat was still dark blue, the skirt was a rose purple, making the colors brighter than what he had seen before.
After all, it was their newlywed period.
She must care deeply about this marriage, paying extra attention to her clothing and accessories.
Duke Jin’an smiled slightly.
“Not yet. I rested for a while,” he said.
Cheng Jiao-niang nodded.
“Why haven’t you changed your clothes?” she asked again.
“I was tired, so I rested first,” replied Duke Jin’an casually, rising to his feet.
The maids promptly followed him into the washroom. After a quick rinse, a maid brought clean clothes.
“Have all my belongings been moved here?” Duke Jin’an asked.
“Only some clothes for now,” the maid replied.
Duke Jin’an asked no further. When he stepped out, Cheng Jiao-niang was already sitting in the bedchamber, dressed only in lavender undergarments, reading a book.
Seeing Duke Jin’an approach, Ban Qin promptly presented a bowl of soup.
“What did Doctor Li say?” Duke Jin’an asked, accepting the bowl as he casually took a seat, his tone seemingly offhand.
“He made some adjustments to your prescription,” Cheng Jiao-niang replied.
Duke Jin’an frowned slightly.
“Still need to take medicine?” he said.
Cheng Jiao-niang set down her book, glanced at him, and smiled.
“Afraid of medicine?” she asked.
Duke Jin’an chuckled, then lifted the bowl and drank a few mouthfuls of the medicinal broth without using a spoon. He looked back at Cheng Jiao-niang.
“What about yours?” he asked.
“I don’t need medicine,” Cheng Jiao-niang replied, smiling faintly as she looked at him.
Was she teasing him?
He hadn’t known she could tease someone.
Indeed, the more time they spent together, the more he discovered sides of her unknown to others.
“This medicine is quite tasty,” Duke Jin’an said with a smile, tilting his head back to finish the broth.
A maid knelt and offered tea for Duke Jin’an to rinse his mouth.
“It’s getting late, and it’s been a long day. Let’s rest early,” Cheng Jiao-niang said.
Duke Jin’an swallowed the mouthful of tea he had been holding.
The maids in the room quickly curtsied and withdrew. Su Xin hesitated for a moment.
“No need to keep watch tonight,” Cheng Jiao-niang added. “All of you may go and rest.”
Su Xin and Ban Qin exchanged a glance, acknowledged the instruction, and retreated.
The lights in the outer room were extinguished one by one.
“You don’t like having anyone keep watch at night even at home?” Duke Jin’an asked casually.
“Yes,” Cheng Jiao-niang replied.
“Neither do I,” Duke Jin’an said with a light laugh.
As the conversation paused, the atmosphere in the room grew slightly still.
“Tonight… do we still need to?” Duke Jin’an asked.
“No,” Cheng Jiao-niang said, rising and walking to the bedside. She reached out to draw back the bed curtains.
Her summer undergarments were thin and light; beneath the lamplight, the lavender fabric faintly revealed her snow-white skin, glowing with a delicate, soft luster.
Duke Jin’an quickly averted his gaze.
“That’s great,” he laughed, standing up and stretching his arms, feigning nonchalance. “No more pain tonight – finally, a good night’s sleep.”
Cheng Jiao-niang glanced back at him.
“Not necessarily,” she said.
The lamp in the room was extinguished. Duke Jin’an strained his eyes to peer at the bed curtains in the dark. The person lying beside him had turned to face outward. The moment they had lain down earlier, any accidental contact between their skin had already been carefully avoided.
A pang of regret stirred within him – it was precisely because he had instinctively shifted inward after that brief touch that Cheng Jiao-niang had turned away to keep her distance.
“I’m just… not quite used to it yet,” he suddenly spoke up.
A soft hum came from the person beside him.
The moment the words left his mouth, Duke Jin’an regretted them.
How could she be used to it? She was still so young.
“What I meant was… I never imagined we would actually get married,” he paused briefly, then continued, “It feels like a dream.”
“It was never meant to be a grand affair,” Cheng Jiao-niang replied. “That’s just how it is.”
Duke Jin’an smiled faintly, raising a hand to pillow behind his head, allowing his somewhat tense body to relax slightly.
“But it should have been something truly wonderful,” he said.
Yet their marriage had taken place under such circumstances – when he was poisoned and awaiting death, when Cheng Si-lang was murdered in a brothel, when they both knew it was a calculated scheme but could do nothing to resolve it…
And to make matters worse, it was forced by an imperial decree from the Empress Dowager, under the guise of a “felicitous union” to ward off ill fortune.
This was not the wedding he had envisioned, nor was it the way he had imagined starting a marriage.
The Prince of Jin’an let out a soft sigh.
“Actually, even if you had disagreed, it would have been fine,” he said. “I… didn’t expect you to agree.”
Through the sheer summer bed curtains, as his eyes adjusted, the darkness was no longer pitch black. A soft, bluish light gently filled the space.
He gazed at the curtain, the familiar delicate fragrance lingering around him. Cheng Jiao-niang’s silhouette gradually grew clearer in his vision.
“No person or circumstance can inconvenience me against my will,” she said plainly.
If she had truly been unwilling, even the Empress Dowager likely could not have forced her in the end.
Yet, under those circumstances, why had she agreed?
Duke Jin’an felt his heart pounding fiercely. He couldn’t help but take a deep breath, carefully withdrawing his hand from beneath his neck and resting it gently on his chest.
“Didn’t we agree on it long ago?” Cheng Jiao-niang said.
Perhaps because she was lying on her side with her back to him, her voice sounded low and somewhat muffled.
Yes, they had indeed agreed to marry long ago – he had asked, and she had consented.
But that time was different from now. Back then, he hadn’t imagined he would involve her, nor that Cheng Si-lang would lose his life because of it…
“Once a promise is made, how can one go back on their word?”
Her gentle yet resolute voice continued.
Once she gave her word, she would never retract it, no matter the circumstances – true to her promise, unwavering in action.
This was the principle, one he understood well. And yet…
Duke Jin’an once again rested his arm behind his head, feeling that the tent was a bit stifling. Unable to help himself, he turned over. No matter how large the bed was, a bed was still a bed – when two people slept in it, there was no way to keep a clear boundary. With this movement, he bumped into Cheng Jiao-niang.
It was summer, and only a thin sheet lay across her waist. Her delicate body, sleeping on its side, collided straight into his arms.
Duke Jin’an was startled and hurriedly leaned back, knocking against the bedboard with a dull thud.
“What’s wrong?” Cheng Jiao-niang asked, bracing herself to sit up.
“Nothing, nothing.” Duke Jin’an only felt his face burning hot, with a trace of irritation mixed in. He quickly lay back down. “It’s late – go to sleep.”
Cheng Jiao-niang didn’t ask any more. She lay back down and stayed still.
Clearly it was him making noise and fussing about… she had almost fallen asleep.
Duke Jin’an turned over to face inward, closed his eyes, and lay perfectly still. He didn’t know how much time had passed; only when his body grew so stiff he could barely endure it did he slowly relax and lie properly again.
Beside him, Cheng Jiao-niang’s breathing was even and long – she was clearly fast asleep.
She didn’t seem the least bit uncomfortable at all…
Both times he had been unconscious and slept straight through, but she had been awake – so she must already be used to it.
And what was there not to get used to? The first time, it had been he himself who insisted on coming.
Duke Jin’an turned his head and looked at Cheng Jiao-niang sleeping on her side beside him. Her loose hair blended into the deep darkness of the night.
He couldn’t remember that day very clearly anymore. He only recalled bowing at the ceremony and drinking the shared wine; after that everything grew hazy. It felt as though he had slept for a very long time and yet only for the blink of an eye. When he woke again, everything still felt unreal. If Master Gu hadn’t been scolding Ah-Jing and Doctor Li at his side, he might have thought it was nothing more than a dream.
So it turned out that he really had married her. Today was the day of their wedding.
On a wedding night with candles and flowers, how could he let her keep the bridal chamber alone?
So he had simply claimed that he felt unwell – on the verge of death. Doctor Li and Ah-Jing insisted on sending him here, and in the end Master Gu, still worried, agreed.
After that, he remembered nothing. He only recalled pain all over his body, so intense that he couldn’t help but cry out. He was usually quite able to endure pain, but this time he truly couldn’t bear it. Later, something – some cloth or the like – had been stuffed into his mouth, and after that he knew nothing at all…
Stuffed with a piece of cloth…
Duke Jin’an looked at the girl beside him and couldn’t help but smile.
She really did come up with the most unexpected ideas.
As he smiled, Duke Jin’an’s expression gradually darkened again.
There was no one and nothing that could put her at a disadvantage.
They schemed against her, harmed her family, forcibly pressed a marriage upon her under the pretext of bringing him good fortune – no, it wasn’t about warding off misfortune at all. It was meant to send her to her death. And so what? She still married in, exactly as they had planned – only she did not let them have their way.
This too was because there was no one and nothing that could put her at a disadvantage.
She could, of course, have resisted the Empress Dowager’s edict and refused this marriage. The outcome would have been much the same as now: those who had plotted against her would still have failed to get what they wanted, and he would certainly have been cured by her.
But if that were the case – would he feel any better?
Perhaps then… they would never have married at all.
The thought flashed through his mind, and Duke Jin’an felt his heart sink abruptly. He could not help reaching out, his hand brushing against the smooth fall of her long hair.
Don’t wake her…
Duke Jin’an abruptly drew his hand back.
Just brushing her hair – she probably wouldn’t feel that, right? Her hair was very long; what lay spread out here shouldn’t be noticeable.
So his hand reached out again. Lying flat was uncomfortable, so he turned gently and lay on his side facing outward.
The pillows were pressed tightly together. In this position he was very close to her, and the fragrance in his breathing grew even stronger.
Without realizing it, Duke Jin’an shifted slightly on the pillow. One hand slipped under it; the other, half deliberately and half unconsciously, gathered a handful of her hair. His thoughts were in complete disarray – one moment he was thinking about what he had to do tomorrow, the next wondering whether she was used to living in this room, then suddenly, with rising enthusiasm, thinking that perhaps he should choose another courtyard and move there… only to think again of the bustle and fatigue that would bring her.
He didn’t know how much time passed. Gradually his eyelids began to fight each other until they closed at last, his head resting against the back of Cheng Jiao-niang’s head.
The sky was faintly beginning to brighten – the hour when people are at their sleepiest, when sleep is deepest.
In the small courtyard where Doctor Li was staying, a figure slowly passed by. The murmuring of summer insects in the courtyard abruptly fell silent, then, after a moment, began chirping and trilling again, as if nothing had happened.
