The maids of the Chen household, along with the attendants at the gate, were all struck dumb in disbelief.
Has the Princess Consort lost her mind again? Without a word of explanation, she just lashed out and struck someone, then had the nerve to ask if it hurt?
Why don’t you try hitting yourself and see how it feels! How could being struck not hurt?
“Does it hurt where I struck you?”
Cheng Jiao-niang looked at Chen Shi’ba-niang, who was being helped up by the maids, and asked again, as though unwilling to let the matter rest without an answer.
Her cheeks burned fiercely, her mouth tasted of iron, and her nose and throat struggled for air, while her ears rang incessantly.
Her mouth must have been cut, and her face was swollen. Yet, the searing pain snapped Chen Shi’ba-niang out of her daze almost immediately.
No one dared approach the woman, and the onlookers stood by in anxious confusion, unsure how to react. This was not solely due to her status as the Princess Consort, but perhaps even more so because of the life-saving favor she had once bestowed upon them.
Does it hurt where I struck you?
Chen Shi’ba-niang raised her head, looked up at the girl standing over her, and smiled. She wiped the blood from her mouth with the back of her hand.
“Your Highness, whatever the matter may be, let us discuss it inside,” a servant hastily approached and said with a bow.
The Chen residence was located in a bustling market district, and now, especially during such a contentious time, countless eyes were fixed upon it. The commotion here quickly drew a large crowd of onlookers.
Out of deference to Minister Chen’s status and position, no one dared approach too closely. They stood at a distance, pointing and whispering among themselves.
“There is no need.”
Chen Shi’ba-niang spoke, wincing the moment she opened her mouth from the sharp pain. Yet, the pain only made her more clear-headed. She pushed away the maids who were supporting her, straightened her posture, raised her head, and looked at Cheng Jiao-niang.
“There is nothing here that cannot be seen in the open.”
Cheng Jiao-niang gazed at her.
“Does it hurt?” she asked once more.
Chen Shi’ba-niang smiled again, lifting a hand to cover her mouth.
“I know what you mean,” she said. “I can tell you – it does hurt.”
What kind of conversation was this?
The maids, servants, and attendants around stood stupefied.
“That is my sister!” Chen Shi’ba-niang shouted, glaring at Cheng Jiao-niang. “How much it hurts isn’t for you to tell me!”
Cheng Jiao-niang looked at her.
“I’m not here to tell you,” she said. “I came only to ask whether you truly understood. Since you do understand, then matters are simpler. For a moment, I genuinely feared you might not even know what pain felt like.”
Having said that, she turned to leave.
“Cheng Jiao-niang!” Chen Shi’ba-niang cried out furiously. “But does it not also hurt you just as much?”
Cheng Jiao-niang turned back to face her.
“Because what you desired was never fulfilled, was it?” Chen Shi’ba-niang said, her words slurred from the injury to her mouth. “Because you never imagined that even Heaven’s designs could be thwarted by human schemes, right? Even if destiny stripped him of his talents, what he once possessed – that is something you and yours can never have again?”
“Eighteenth Young Lady!” a servant nearby jolted and hastily called out, cutting off Chen Shi’ba-niang’s words.
“Why can this not be said?” Chen Shi’ba-niang retorted sharply. Though reprimanding a servant, her gaze remained fixed on Cheng Jiao-niang. “Will keeping silent truly hide the truth from the world?”
Cheng Jiao-niang smiled faintly.
“No,” she said, “I don’t feel pain. I’ve told you before – I don’t speak out of modesty. Have you forgotten?”
Not out of modesty?
Chen Shi’ba-niang stared at her.
“My calligraphy isn’t very impressive either.”
“No, no, Lady Cheng, you’re being too humble.”
“I am not being humble.”
The words echoed faintly in her ears, distant and muffled by the persistent ringing.
She hadn’t forgotten. How could she ever forget?
No matter how hard she tried, it would never be enough, for she lacked the innate talent.
“You’ve forgotten,” Cheng Jiao-niang said, shaking her head slowly. “Chen Su, have you forgotten why you began practicing calligraphy in the first place?”
Chen Shi’ba-niang froze.
Calligraphy?
“You’ve forgotten,” Cheng Jiao-niang continued, her head still swaying gently. “And you’ve also forgotten – if I say something isn’t good, then it isn’t good. If I say that no matter how hard you try, it will never work, then it truly never will.”
She gazed at Chen Shi’ba-niang, a faint smile playing on her lips, and raised a finger, wagging it slowly.
“That’s why I don’t feel pain,” she said. “Because what I have will always remain mine, and what others lack will forever stay out of their reach.”
What others lack will forever stay out of their reach?
The person she had just mentioned was the Crown Prince. Was Cheng Jiao–niang now speaking of the Crown Prince as well?
Didn’t her words imply that the Crown Prince would still…
Chen Shi’ba-niang’s expression abruptly shifted, though on her already swollen and flushed face, the change was barely noticeable.
“What do you mean by that?” she demanded, taking a step forward.
“Exactly what you think I mean,” Cheng Jiao-niang replied with a nod, then turned to leave.
“Lady Cheng.”
A woman’s voice called out.
Cheng Jiao-niang halted and glanced to the side. There, inside the gate, stood Madam Chen, supported by two maids, watching intently.
Madam Chen looked weary and frail, a far cry from the poised and elegant noblewoman she once was.
When her eyes met Cheng Jiao-niang’s, tears began to fall. She lifted a hand to cover her face.
She had addressed her as “Lady Cheng.”
Cheng Jiaoniang looked at her and curtsied respectfully.
“Your Highness, our master invites you to come inside and speak,” a servant said, stepping forward from beside Madam Chen.
“There is no need,” Cheng Jiaoniang said. “I came today solely to see Madam Chen.”
As she spoke, she glanced toward Madam Chen with a faint smile.
“I have already seen her.”
Madam Chen looked at her, tears streaming down her face.
“Go and see Dan-niang,” she said.
“There is no need,” Cheng Jiao-niang replied. With another curtsy, she turned and walked away.
The carriage wheeled around and swiftly departed.
Madam Chen could not help taking a few steps forward as though to follow, but the maids beside her held her back firmly.
“Madam, you must not go out. In times like these, meeting Lady Cheng would do her no good,” they urged. “She is now a princess consort, and with the recent troubles at the Duke’s residence, it would be best to heed the master’s words.”
Madam Chen stopped in her tracks, watching the departing carriage and sobbing uncontrollably.
“Does it hurt?”
In the study, Chen Shao remained motionless, sitting in the same position as before. Listening to the servant’s hushed recount, he slowly asked,
“She only said this one sentence?”
The servant lowered his head and confirmed it with a quiet affirmation.
Chen Shao said nothing more and waved his hand dismissively.
The servant promptly bowed and withdrew.
The study fell into silence. After a moment, a crisp slap suddenly broke the stillness.
“Does it hurt?”
Chen Shao spoke as he lifted his hand and struck his own face once more.
Another crisp slap echoed through the room.
What you are not forced to face, the life you will not have to live – if the pain is not on your body, how could you possibly know whether it hurts or not?
When it strikes you, do you feel the pain?
The sound of sharp slaps, one after another, echoed from inside the study, making the attendants standing outside bow their heads even lower.
…
Hearing the commotion outside the door, Duke Jin’an set down the book in his hands and watched as Cheng Jiao-niang entered.
“You’re back,” he said with a smile.
Cheng Jiao-niang nodded and went inside to freshen up.
By the time she finished, dinner had already been laid out.
“Did you see Dan-niang?” Duke Jin’an asked.
Cheng Jiao-niang shook her head and reached for her bowl and chopsticks.
At this time, and with her current status, it was likely the Chen family felt it best to maintain some distance.
“In this, we are alike,” Duke Jin’an remarked with a light laugh. “My request to enter the palace to see the Crown Prince was also denied. Moreover, the Empress Dowager has ordered me to leave the capital and go to my fief.”
Shortly after the incident where a beaten men were thrown at an official’s doorstep and a half-dead eunuch was cast into the palace, frightening the Empress Dowager into a faint, the court had finalized Duke Jin’an’s fiefdom amidst the overwhelming flood of censure memorials.
It was Songping County, located in the southwest.
“A place so obscure you could strain your eyes over a map and still not find it,” Duke Jin’an remarked with a wry smile. “Given my current poor health, how could I possibly undertake such a long and arduous journey? So I declined.”
He paused and chuckled softly.
“If you have things to take care of outside these next few days, better do as much as you can now. Most likely, starting tomorrow, we’ll be placed under house arrest.”
Cheng Jiao-niang nodded.
“I don’t need to go out anymore,” she said.
“So now that you have finished your business, you can stay home and keep me company?” Duke Jin’an teased with a smile.
Cheng Jiao-niang glanced at him, her expression calm and composed.
Not the least bit amusing – truly no match for how entertaining it was when she teased him.
Duke Jin’an lowered his head and focused on eating.
After washing up, the maids in the room tidied up and withdrew. Duke Jin’an, while loosening his hair, looked toward Cheng Jiao-niang seated by the window in the inner chamber, reading a book under the lamplight.
Dressed in a soft green sleeping robe, her hair was already undone and cascading down her back. The gentle glow of the lamp cast a serene silhouette around her.
Unable to resist, Duke Jin’an walked over and sat down beside her.
“How come you enjoy reading so much?” he asked.
“Because reading is something you can do alone,” Cheng Jiao-niang replied.
Alone…
Duke Jin’an reached out and gently took the book from her hands.
“But now there are two of us,” he said, raising an eyebrow with a playful smile. “Let’s play a game of chess instead.”
Cheng Jiao-niang looked at him and smiled as well.
“Alright, but don’t complain if you find it dull,” she said.
Perhaps it was the effect of the evening, but under the lamplight, Cheng Jiao-niang’s eyes seemed especially bright, carrying a lively sparkle rarely seen during the day.
“With you by my side, nothing could ever be dull,” Duke Jin’an blurted out.
No sooner had the words left his lips than his face flushed bright red, his ears burning.
That line was even bolder than the one he’d spoken during dinner.
“I’ll go get the chess set,” he said hastily, darting away.
But it didn’t take long for him to realize what Cheng Jiao-niang had meant by “dull.”
Staring at the board where the outcome was once again decisively settled, Duke Jin’an shook his head, leaned on the chessboard with his hands, and looked across at his opponent.
“Cheng Fang!” he called out.
His tone carried a hint of frustration.
Cheng Jiao-niang looked at him, her lips curving into a faint smile.
“Well then, another win,” she said, reaching out to place her final piece.
“Wait a moment…” Duke Jin’an reached out and grasped her hand. “Let me take another look.”
He lowered his head, eyes wide and fixed on the chessboard, stubbornly searching for a sliver of hope to turn the game around.
The hand he held was soft and smooth. As it curled slightly around a chess piece, the back of her hand stretched gently, filling his palm perfectly.
Just like the skin on her body – silky and smooth…
Duke Jin’an’s focus faltered. His gaze grew somewhat hazy as he stared at the chessboard, and he felt his heartbeat quicken.
The hand in his remained where it was, making no attempt to withdraw, as though such contact had already grown familiar.
And then?
What should he do next? What was supposed to come after this?
A faint layer of sweat broke out on Duke Jin’an’s forehead.
“Have you looked enough?” Cheng Jiao-niang asked with a light laugh, her gaze shifting to his hand.
Or perhaps she meant – have you touched enough?
That single glance made Duke Jin’an let go of her hand as though he’d been singed by fire.
“I lose, I lose,” he said, reaching out to sweep the chess pieces across the board. “No more games. Let’s sleep.”
Darkness settled over the room.
Duke Jin’an lay awake, staring up at the shadowy canopy overhead. He turned over once again, seemingly unintentionally letting his hand drift slowly across the pillow toward her side until it brushed against the smooth strands of her hair. At once, his hand snapped back as if startled.
Not long after, he repeated the motion.
But the person beside him remained turned to the other side, breathing steadily and softly in sleep, the sound growing clearer and clearer in his ears.
She had fallen asleep.
She must be tired from going out today, and even more so in her heart.
Duke Jin’an withdrew his hand with a self-conscious feeling.
Let it grow a little colder, he thought. When it grows colder, I’ll ask her to come closer, into my arms, to keep her warm.
He shifted slightly closer to her, breathing in the faint, lingering fragrance in the air, and closed his eyes.
…
“Your Highness!”
The morning calm was broken by the slightly urgent voice of Eunuch Jing.
Duke Jin’an set down his bowl and chopsticks, his expression tinged with displeasure.
Eunuch Jing, however, paid no mind to his expression. Instead, his gaze was fixed on Cheng Jiao-niang.
“Yesterday, did you go to the Chen residence and strike someone from their family?” he asked.
Strike someone? Was it because they wouldn’t let her see Dan–niang?
Duke Jin’an looked over in surprise.
Cheng Jiao-niang remained composed.
“Yes,” she said.
“How… how could you do such a thing?” Eunuch Jing pressed anxiously.
“If she struck someone, there must have been a reason for it,” Duke Jin’an said, frowning slightly.
Still defending her, still protecting her.
“People have said that Her Highness struck without saying a single word,” Eunuch Jing insisted.
“That’s not true,” Cheng Jiao-niang replied, shaking her head.
Both Eunuch Jing and Duke Jin’an looked at her.
“I said one sentence before striking,” Cheng Jiao-niang explained.
Eunuch Jing was taken aback, while Duke Jin’an couldn’t help but chuckle softly.
“Your Highness!” Eunuch Jing nearly stomped his foot. “Do you understand what you are doing? How could you rush to the Chen residence and strike someone? At any other time it might be overlooked, but now, with the Chen family designated for the Crown Princess – your actions will be seen as scheming and ill-intentioned!”
Cheng Jiao-niang nodded.
“Then that’s good,” she said, looking at Eunuch Jing with a faint smile. “I was afraid others might not think I had ulterior motives.”
