Outside the city of Quzhou, the Chen Shi’liu-lang and his wife bowed repeatedly.
“Safe travels, Father,” they said.
Liu Kui waved his hand somewhat uncomfortably.
“I told you not to come to see me off,” he said.
“If we hadn’t known, of course we wouldn’t have come,” Chen Shi’liu-lang replied, bowing again. “But since we knew, how could we not see you off?”
“Don’t tell anyone about this,” Liu Kui hurriedly added.
What kind of father sees his daughter off to her wedding all the way to the doorstep of her in-laws’ home?
“I was simply accompanying your Fourth Uncle Xu back to his hometown and took the chance to see her off for a bit.”
Xu Sigen, standing nearby, chuckled. Liu Kui shot him a glare.
“Isn’t that so?” he asked.
Xu Sigen nodded with a smile, agreeing that it was, then looked toward Lady Liu, who was still reluctant to part.
“Don’t be sad,” he said. “After the New Year and when spring comes, you’ll go to the northwest with your husband.”
Lady Liu nodded.
“Fourth Uncle, please keep an eye on my father. Make sure he drinks less,” she said. “And tell him not to always argue and clash with his superiors.”
Having been spoken to like that by his daughter, Liu Kui’s face flushed red instantly.
“You silly girl, what do you know,” he barked, glaring.
Xu Sigen pulled him back and, smiling, nodded to Lady Liu.
“Alright, I understand,” he said. “It’s cold out, you two should head back quickly.” Then he turned his gaze toward Chen Shi’liu-lang.
Chen Shi’liu-lang had also been stealing glances at him from the side, and when their eyes met, he quickly lowered his gaze and bowed.
“Let’s go,” Liu Kui said. “We still have a journey ahead and need to reach home before New Year.” Without further hesitation, he mounted his horse.
Watching the two men mount their horses and gallop away without a backward glance, Lady Liu couldn’t help but raise her hand to wipe away tears.
“Mo-niang, don’t be sad,” Chen Shi’liu-lang said. “After the New Year, you’ll see each other again.”
Lady Liu nodded and dried her tears.
“Let’s go back, it’s really cold,” Chen Shi’liu-lang said, reaching out to take her hand. “Let me warm you up.”
Outside the city gate, people were coming and going. Blushing, Lady Liu quickly withdrew her hand and hurried into the carriage.
Chen Shi’liu-lang also looked a little awkward as he followed and got in. As the carriage set off along another road, he couldn’t resist glancing back.
That man, whose features seemed ordinary but carried a certain air of authority, was her sworn brother – the Imperial Uncle, appointed as the Supervisor of the Northwest Route Pasturage Office.
“Have you ever met Her Majesty the Empress before?”
The question came from beside him, sudden and unexpected.
Chen Sixteenth’s body stiffened involuntarily.
“I heard that back in the capital, the first family Her Majesty met was yours,” Lady Liu asked curiously.
“Yes,” Chen Shi’liu-lang replied. “Her Majesty was our family’s savior.”
She was then, and she still is now.
He couldn’t help but let out a long, quiet sigh.
Before his eyes, the figure of that woman standing under the dappled shadows of the trees surfaced in his memory.
“Of course not. It was this young master alone who was remarkable.”
“The story of the Qieting Temple and the Qieting Stele was also very well told.”
The girl had said with a gentle smile.
How could he not have met her? There had even been talks of marriage – talks that never came to fruition. He had been heartbroken for quite some time after…
Naturally, this was a matter of the heart he dared not speak of to anyone.
“You, and your whole family, are truly good people,” Lady Liu said.
Chen Shi’liu-lang turned to look at her. His newlywed wife’s smiling face was as lovely as a flower.
“Back then, Her Majesty was still a simple, orphaned girl, yet your family treated her so well,” she said with a smile.
Even though there was the favor of healing and care involved, the gap in social status and position was vast.
“It was Her Majesty who was truly kind. In truth, our family has always been indebted to her,” Chen Shi’liu-lang replied, also smiling softly. He reached out and took his young wife’s hand.
Lady Liu’s face flushed red again, and she tried to pull her hand back.
“We’re inside the carriage,” Chen Shi’liu-lang said, chuckling, and held her hand tighter without letting go.
Only after they had ridden quite a distance did Liu Kui look back, catching just a glimpse of the distant donkey cart, now almost out of sight.
“It’s not like they have no money – why not buy a proper carriage? Hiring a donkey cart with such a scrawny donkey – do they even expect it to make it back?” he grumbled, clearly annoyed.
Xu Sigen laughed heartily.
“Stop worrying about things that aren’t your business,” he said. “Do you really think the Chen family would parade through the streets with fine horses and silks at a time like this? So many eyes are watching them.”
Liu Kui glared, about to retort, but Xu Sigen cut him off before he could speak.
“…If it weren’t so, why would Her Majesty have questioned you directly? How many people do you think are like you – unafraid of others’ talk, unbothered by reputation?”
Of course!
“What do I, Liu Kui, care about being called a scoundrel!” Liu Kui declared, his face instantly turning proud. “Back then, you were the manager of Tai Ping Residence – rich, and your sister even knew Minister Chen – influential. So what? In my eyes, you were still deserters! And deserters must be caught!”
Xu Sigen raised his hand and gave Liu Kui’s horse a flick with the whip.
“How many times do I have to say it – we weren’t deserters, we were forced into it,” he insisted.
“Even if you were forced, you still deserted!” Liu Kui shot back, eyes wide with indignation.
The two of them glared at each other for a moment, but then Xu Sigen suddenly broke into a laugh.
“Thinking back, it feels like it happened just yesterday, yet four or five years have already passed,” he said.
In the blink of an eye, so much had changed – the people, the scenes.
That remark instantly deflated Liu Kui’s bravado.
“Sigen,” he muttered in a low, somber voice. “Do you… hate me?”
Xu Sigen turned to look at him, a flicker of surprise in his expression.
“Hate you for what?” he asked.
“If back then I hadn’t arrested you…” Liu Kui raised his head and gazed ahead. The winter fields stretched before them, bleak and desolate. On the horizon, several riders seemed to be galloping toward them, the Maoyuan Mountain brothers riding with bright, soaring smiles.
“…Fanjianglin and Fan Shitou, valiant warriors of the Armored Squad of the Jieshi Fort, Wei-zhou; cavalrymen Xu Sigen and Xu Layue; junior warrior Fan Sanchou…”
“…You cowards! If you have the guts to desert, the guts to use your own brothers as shields against swords and arrows, then have the guts to come fight me!…”
“…What does it mean to be ‘valiant’? To be fierce and skilled in battle, relied upon by your commanders. Look at yourselves now – what are you doing?…”
He lowered his gaze, fighting back the burning tightness in his throat.
If things hadn’t turned out as they did back then, the seven of them would still be living freely in the capital, gaining offices and titles, starting families and careers, surrounded by children and grandchildren – not lying as lonely handfuls of earth outside the capital now.
So many times in his dreams, he’d see himself pulling the carts carrying the bodies of Xu Maoxiu and the other four, walking on and on until he woke up, only to stare at the tent ceiling until dawn.
Back then, his heart was filled with regret – so much regret.
“Yes, I did hate deserters,” he said, pausing briefly with a self-mocking smile. “But when I arrested you all, it wasn’t so much about hating deserters as it was about venting my frustration. I was angry about being driven out of the northwest, angry that I couldn’t face the enemy on the battlefield. I longed so desperately to fight on the front lines but couldn’t, and then you – you actually ran away. I was just holding onto a stubborn breath of air, gritting my teeth and forcing a confrontation. What good came of it? If you had truly been deserters, you wouldn’t have cared about my provocation at all. Those who did care were, in truth, honorable men.”
If it had been otherwise, they wouldn’t have given up resistance under his siege, nor would they have surrendered when they clearly had the chance to escape.
The only ones who could be hurt were those who cared.
He had hurt them, using something that mattered deeply to both him and them.
Xu Sigen smiled.
“Since you’ve said all this, what’s the point of talking about ‘what ifs’?” he said, looking at Liu Kui with a grin. “Even without you, we would still have gone to the northwest anyway.”
A hint of pride flickered in his eyes.
“Our sister had already prepared everything for us. You were just a trigger, that’s all. Whether you were there or not, we would have gone. As for whether the outcome would have been what it is now – that has nothing to do with you.”
His voice softened slightly as he spoke.
If they hadn’t held the city gate back then, if that damned officer hadn’t fled first, perhaps…
But then he lifted his head again.
No, there are no “ifs” in this world. Things are as they are. Since this is how it turned out, so be it. Besides, they died for a worthy cause – no regrets.
“You – at home, you complain about Sister-in-law getting all weepy,” Xu Sigen chuckled, “but look at you now, getting all sentimental over your daughter. Seems like you’ve grown a bit soft yourself.”
He swung his horsewhip – this time striking his own horse.
“Stop being so wishy-washy. A true man lives boldly and dies without hesitation. What’s done is done. There’s no room for all these ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’.”
Watching Xu Sigen gallop away, Liu Kui grinned, swung his own whip, and urged his horse forward to catch up.
Though they had traveled with urgency, by the time they returned to Longgu City, it was already the tenth of January. Even so, the festive atmosphere in the streets remained strong. Lanterns of all kinds were already hung up in anticipation of the upcoming Lantern Festival.
This kind of holiday spirit, lasting so intensely for so long, was something Longgu City hadn’t experienced in many years – and not just Longgu City; fortress towns all along the line were enjoying the same peace. It was all thanks to the thunder cannons placed on the city gates.
A single thunderous blast, shaking heaven and earth, could leave rivers of blood.
Ever since the cannons roared just before the New Year, the Western bandits had been thoroughly terrified. Winter and year’s end used to be prime times for their raids, but now such incursions had completely vanished.
“Come to my place. Your own house must be cold and empty.”
At the city gate, Liu Kui called out to Xu Sigen.
“I am, after all, a Supervisor with a sizable estate and crowds of servants,” Xu Sigen replied with a laugh. “Even if I’ve been away for a month, it’s not like my home will be completely cold and barren.” Without waiting for Liu Kui to say more, he flicked his reins and rode off.
“But without a woman in the house, it’s bound to feel cold and empty,” Liu Kui murmured, shaking his head.
Before Xu Sigen even stepped through his front gate, he heard the joyful noise of children laughing and playing. His heart instantly leaped with delight.
“Has Brother arrived?” he asked.
The servant who came to welcome him smiled and confirmed it.
“They arrived before the New Year. Master and Madam both came.”
Even Sister-in-law came?
“But Sister-in-law is pregnant! How could she travel so far at a time like this?” Xu Sigen said, startled, and hurried inside.
“Don’t worry. We consulted Her Majesty the Empress before setting out,” Fan Jianglin said with a smile.
Since his younger sister said it was fine, then it surely must be.
Xu Sigeng let out a sigh of relief.
When he entered, Fan Jianglin was practicing martial arts with Xiao Bao’er. Though still young, Xiao Bao’er was going through the motions with proper form. Seeing Xu Sigen, the child looked a little unsure, even somewhat unfamiliar.
“He was still little when I left, so he doesn’t remember his Fourth Uncle,” Xu Sigen said with a smile.
Xiao Bao’er smiled timidly, then turned and ran to hide behind Lady Huang, who had just walked out.
The maid nearby quickly moved to shield her, careful lest the child bump into Lady Huang, whose body was now quite heavily rounded.
“He’ll get familiar once you stay this time,” Lady Huang said, smiling.
“Are you not going back to the capital?” Xu Sigen asked, understanding the implication.
“Now that the production of thunder cannons and divine arm bows has increased and repairs for damages are more frequent, I’ve come to the northwest as an Army Supervisor,” Fan Jianglin explained with a gentle smile.
“What about the capital…” Xu Sigen began.
“Li Mao is there. With him handling things, it’s more than enough. He’s much more capable than I am,” Fan Jianglin said.
As they spoke, the two of them entered the main hall.
“No, that’s not what I meant,” Xu Sigen said after a slight hesitation. “I meant… is our sister alone in the capital now…”
Fan Jianglin smiled.
“Master Zhou and his family have returned to the capital,” he said. “Though Cao Gui has been appointed to an official post elsewhere, the Jin Ge’er family from Jiang-zhou has arrived in the capital. First Master Cheng has asked them to manage the capital’s businesses. Ban Qin has also married – her husband serves in the Imperial Guard and their home is in the capital. So when you count it up, there are actually quite a few people in the capital now. It’s hardly lonely.”
Xu Sigen nodded.
“That’s good,” he said.
“You’re not young anymore either. It’s time to think about starting a family,” Fan Jianglin remarked.
Xu Sigen remained silent.
“I know what’s on your mind,” Fan Jianglin said, sitting down with a sigh. “You feel that since the others are lying alone underground, just being alive is enough for you. But life doesn’t work that way.”
Xu Sigen gave a faint smile.
“You’re right,” he said, bowing slightly toward Fan Jianglin. “Now that you and Sister-in-law are here, there’ll be someone to arrange a marriage for me.”
Fan Jianglin paused, then smiled and nodded.
“Oh, and since Master Zhou’s family has returned to the capital, does that mean Young Master Zhou will also be coming back for a while?” Xu Sigen asked, as if suddenly remembering.
“Not necessarily,” Fan Jianglin replied. “Young Master Zhou left the capital in a hurry right after the Empress’s formal investiture. I have a feeling he doesn’t really want to return to the capital.”
…
Thud.
A bone-handled knife was tossed into a wooden chest.
Zhou Fu clapped his hands lightly and closed the lid.
“A gift for the meeting,” he said.
Footsteps approached from outside.
“Young Master, Young Master, aren’t we going back to the capital?” A servant came in and asked. “The master has sent a letter urging us. Besides, Third Master and the others are already in the northwestern army. If you’re here too, people might start saying the entire northwestern army has become the Zhou family’s domain, and that would invite criticism toward Her Majesty…”
Zhou Fu chuckled.
“Who taught you to say that?” he asked, looking at the servant. “You actually know how to use concern for Her Majesty to block me.”
The servant gave an awkward smile.
“Pack up, let’s go,” Zhou Fu said.
The servant was taken aback, then immediately overjoyed.
“Young Master, you’re willing to go back?” he exclaimed.
Zhou Fu clasped his hands behind his back and looked at him.
“Why wouldn’t I be willing to go back?” he retorted.
Obviously, it’s because of your feelings for the Empress…
The servant muttered silently in his heart, though he didn’t dare voice the thought.
Zhou Fu didn’t speak further, simply stepped forward.
Why should I not dare to see her? Is it because I can’t be with her in this lifetime? Or because I don’t want to see her living as husband and wife with another man?
Perhaps that might have been the case before, but she gave me her very life – what more could I possibly ask for?
He lowered his head and took out a letter from his robe.
It was a letter sent by Doctor Li, who had been wandering through western and southern Hunan.
The Witch King’s blessing – a blessing that saves others, and a curse that kills oneself.
No one knew what secret method she had used to sustain her own life, waiting for a chance at survival.
“…However, this life force can only sustain her for three months. If there’s no solution after that, death is inevitable,”
Doctor Li wrote in the letter.
That is to say, if things had been even slightly later back then, even after being named Empress, she wouldn’t have survived.
Zhou Fu stopped walking and let out a long breath.
She had completely given up on living.
Even if that guy was deeply devoted to her and never abandoned her, who could know whether the Emperor would wake up? Who could say for sure that if he did wake up, he would abdicate? If the Emperor didn’t wake up, when he would die was anyone’s guess.
And the crucial point was, who could guarantee that all these things would happen within three months?
This stubborn girl…
He turned his head.
“Bring that chest,” he said.
The servant was momentarily puzzled.
“Gifts for her,” Zhou Fu said. “I’ve collected so many. It’s enough for one good send-off.”
The servant’s face filled with astonishment.
“Young Master, are you alright?” he exclaimed.
No one knew the young master better than he did. What was in that chest? It wasn’t just gifts – it was a whole chest of unspoken, unutterable feelings.
“What could be wrong? I’m perfectly fine,” Zhou Fu said with a light laugh, then turned and strode away.
Some feelings don’t need to be said aloud. In this life, meeting even one person willing to give their life for you is more than enough. What need is there to cling to promises of eternity? Just knowing such a person exists in this world is enough to fill a lifetime.
Horses galloped, dust churning in their wake. As the landscape ahead gradually grew more prosperous, the piercingly cold winds that had blown from the northwest softened and gentled.
“Just another half month, and we’ll reach the capital,” the servant called out from behind.
Zhou Fu, bundled tightly in his traveling clothes, lifted his head and looked toward the prefectural city ahead.
“Let’s rest here in the city tonight,” he said. “See what’s interesting around here.”
The servant made a sound of surprise.
“Young Master, are you going to buy more?” he exclaimed. “You’ve been buying things all along the way – the carriage is almost full!”
Zhou Fu turned and glared at him, about to speak, but suddenly froze.
Puzzled, the servant followed his gaze.
By the roadside was a tea stall, currently filled with travelers resting.
Zhou Fu’s eyes were fixed on one of the figures sitting there, his expression slowly shifting into disbelief.
Was… that… him?
