Half a year had passed since they last met. When Shen Yujiao and Pei Yi saw each other again, both immediately noticed how the other had changed.
By late March, the weather was warm enough for light spring garments. Yet Shen Yujiao, still in her confinement month, could not risk catching a chill. Over her thin spring dress, she wore a sleeveless vest of white satin embroidered with golden flowers, a red-gold agate band around her forehead, her dark hair coiled up with a gold hairpin. Her face was still as fair and lovely as before, but her eyes now carried a maternal gentleness — soft and serene.
Pei Yi thought to herself — A mother truly becomes a different kind of woman.
Shen Yujiao, too, observed Pei Yi. Compared to the shy, restrained girl from the previous year, the young Fifth Lady before her was composed and radiant. Every gesture, every smile, carried the grace of a woman ready to take charge of her own household.
Indeed, half a year under Madam Wang’s tutelage had not been in vain.
Madam Wang might be proud, but her skill in managing the household, running affairs, and dealing with others was beyond question.
The sisters-in-law chatted for a while in the inner room. When Di Ge’er awoke, the wet nurse brought the child in.
“At last, I get to see him.”
When Pei Yi saw the baby, her eyes were full of joy. “Just as I was leaving home, the news that Sister-in-law had given birth to a son arrived. The whole family was delighted. Sister-in-law, may I hold my little nephew?”
Shen Yujiao smiled. “Of course.”
The nursemaid handed the baby over, and Pei Yi carefully took him into her arms. After studying his features, she praised sincerely, “He looks like a little golden boy from the Buddha’s side—truly adorable.”
Di Ge’er wasn’t afraid of strangers at this age. No matter who held him, he never fussed. Either he stared blankly with wide eyes or slept soundly—just as quiet as he had been in his mother’s womb.
After playing with the child for a while, Pei Yi handed him back to the nursemaid. Her bright, watery eyes turned to Shen Yujiao. “Sister-in-law…”
Seeing her hesitation, Shen Yujiao already had a faint guess. She lifted her teacup, took a slow sip, and finally said, “These past six months, my husband and I haven’t been home. It must have been hard on you, Fifth Sister, to fulfill our filial duties and care for Mother-in-law in our stead. How is her health now?”
Since Shen Yujiao brought up the topic first, Pei Yi quietly let out a sigh of relief, her expression easing. “Sister-in-law is too polite. It’s my blessing to be able to serve before Mother. She’s been teaching me household management and etiquette—I’ve gained so much, how could I call it hard work? As for her health, it’s decent, only…”
She paused and spoke carefully, “She doesn’t seem to have much spirit lately. She’s often listless, and I’ve seen her sitting alone, lost in thought. I think she must be missing… Brother, you, and the little one.”
Given Pei Yi’s position—and the affection built during her months at Madam Wang’s side—Shen Yujiao understood she would naturally speak up for her mother-in-law.
And she also knew these words came from Pei Yi herself. With Madam Wang’s pride, she would never show even a trace of melancholy or defeat before others.
Ah, this well-meaning but misguided Fifth Lady of the Pei family.
“By April, the examination results will be announced. If your brother passes, perhaps he can spare time to return home.”
Shen Yujiao set down her teacup, her tone mild and calm. “By then, I’ll be out of confinement and able to look after both the child and the household myself. He can rest assured and return home in person to deliver the good news to Mother.”
“Sister-in-law won’t bring Di Ge’er along?”
“The child is still too young and prone to illness,” Shen Yujiao said, glancing at the baby in the nursemaid’s arms. “We’ll see after he turns one. He can be formally registered then, too.”
Infants were fragile. Even in noble families with fine care, not every child survived. Only after the first birthday—if the child had proven hardy—would their name be entered into the family genealogy. Before that, the short life of a lost infant was never recorded.
Realizing she had asked a foolish question, Pei Yi’s cheeks burned, and she lowered her eyes. “Sister-in-law is right.”
Shen Yujiao didn’t continue the topic and instead turned the conversation toward Pei Yi’s wedding the next day.
Pei Yi relaxed, answering shyly.
After a teacup’s time, she rose to take her leave.
Before going, she mentioned casually, “Among the trunks I brought, eighteen are gifts from Mother to you and Brother. Qiu Pozi was supposed to come pay respects and deliver the gift list, but Brother said you were still in confinement and disliked disturbance, so he accepted them on your behalf.”
Eighteen trunks of gifts…
Shen Yujiao certainly didn’t flatter herself into thinking they were meant for her.
It was all on account of Di Ge’er.
Madam Wang might not be a good mother-in-law, but she was a devoted mother and a generous grandmother.
“I understand,” Shen Yujiao said with a faint smile. “I can’t see you off tomorrow, so I’ll wish you in advance a joyful marriage—may you and your husband be of one heart and grow old together.”
“Thank you for your kind words, Sister-in-law.” Pei Yi’s face turned rosy as she bowed gracefully and withdrew.
By evening, the mist of dusk thickened and herons flew overhead.
After settling the affairs at the front courtyard, Pei Xia came to Shen Yujiao’s quarters.
Since that morning when he had taken a nap in the back courtyard, Qiao Momo had indeed whispered much into Shen Yujiao’s ear that very night.
Thus, the couple continued to sleep in separate chambers. But whenever Pei Xia was home, he always joined her for dinner.
That evening, as they dined, the conversation inevitably turned to Pei Yi’s marriage.
And since the marriage involved both the Pei and Wang families, it naturally couldn’t avoid mentioning Madam Wang.
When Shen Yujiao asked about the eighteen trunks of gifts, Pei Xia’s hand holding the chopsticks paused slightly. He slowly chewed and swallowed his food before lifting his eyes. “Did Fifth Sister tell you?”
Shen Yujiao nodded and looked back at him, half-jesting. “Were you planning to hide some private money?”
Pei Xia chuckled.
But only for a moment—his smile soon faded. His eyes grew calm and deep as he looked at her. “You’re still in confinement. I didn’t want such things to trouble your mind.”
He knew the rift between his mother and his wife could never truly be mended. Nor did he wish to force either side to pretend harmony for appearance’s sake.
Such harmony was meaningless.
As things stood—living separately and not disturbing each other—was best.
“I’m not so petty as to begrudge gifts from a grandmother to her grandson,” Shen Yujiao said, lifting her eyes slightly. “They’re all meant for Di Ge’er, aren’t they?”
Pei Xia hummed in assent. “Those are from my mother’s private holdings. She turned over all the family accounts to me last year. These gifts came from her dowry.”
A woman’s dowry was her untouchable property—beyond her husband’s reach, entirely under her own control.
Last year, Madam Wang had handed over her household seal and keys. Whether it was out of spite or from genuine disappointment and weariness, she had transferred the Pei family’s assets cleanly—without keeping even a single acre of land or shop to herself.
Later, all those property ledgers passed from Pei Xia’s hands into Shen Yujiao’s.
Madam Wang now lived in their old Luoyang residence. Her daily food and household expenses came from the central family account, but if she wanted to reward servants or buy clothing and jewelry, that came from her dowry.
No one knew exactly how rich the dowry of the Langya Wang family’s legitimate daughter had been, but the fact that Madam Wang sent eighteen sedan chairs’ worth of wedding gifts showed just how much she cherished this grandson.
“I’ll have someone deliver the gift list later.”
Pei Xia recalled that long list — aside from the usual silks, jewels, and rare books, there had been a chest full of children’s toys, half new and half the ones he had played with as a child.
He had thought they were long lost, yet she’d kept them carefully preserved, passing them down through the years to his own child.
Shen Yujiao could also sense the quiet and enduring emotion behind that gesture.
People are not plants — who can truly be without feeling?
Now that she herself was a mother, she understood: to a mother, a child is an existence that no relative can ever replace.
“When you’ve passed the exams and have some free time, you should go back and visit her.”
Pei Xia looked at her.
“She and I are not destined to be a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law who are close as mother and daughter. But you and she — that bond of mother and son can’t be severed.”
After a moment’s thought, Shen Yujiao added, “Besides, since you’ll be serving in Chang’an with your wife and children while leaving your widowed mother alone back home, it’s not great for your reputation as an official. If you could hurry back more often during the holidays, perhaps that might make up for it a little?”
At that, Pei Xia’s refined brows lifted in a wry smile. “Yuniang really is generous — but completely unconcerned about tiring me out.”
“Huh?” Shen Yujiao blinked.
Pei Xia said, “You think I’m made of iron, that running back and forth between Chang’an and Luoyang won’t wear me out?”
Caught by his amused gaze, Shen Yujiao felt a little embarrassed and muttered, “It’s for your good reputation, that’s all.”
The best solution, of course, would be to bring Madam Wang to live in Chang’an. But that would only put Yuniang back in the same awkward situation as before.
Pei Xia knew she was already being as tolerant as she could. As her husband, he could not betray that trust.
“We’ll talk about it next year.”
Meeting Shen Yujiao’s surprised eyes, he calmly placed a piece of glistening cherry-red pork into her bowl. “If she truly repents, I’ll take the child to pay her respects next year.”
But if she remained obstinate — a woman who once abetted others and nearly caused his child’s mother to die — how could she possibly be worthy of the title “Grandmother”?
Pei Shouzhen owed her a life from birth.
But Pei Jingning, who was not of her blood, like Yuniang herself, owed her nothing at all.
—
The next morning, the Pei household was lively and bustling.
Most of the maids from Shen Yujiao’s courtyard had gone to help. Sitting inside, she couldn’t see the commotion out front, but her two maids, Xiaying and Qiulu — one lively, one still young — kept running back, faces glowing with excitement, to report the latest happenings.
“Fifth Young Lady’s wedding gown is so beautiful! The gold thread shines in the sunlight — dazzling!”
“And her round fan too — it’s embroidered with twin lotuses on one stem, studded with glass beads. From afar it looks like dewdrops glistening on lotus petals!”
“The groom’s here! He looks so handsome in his wedding robe. Heehee, though still not as handsome as our master.”
“Of course not! There’s not another man in all of Chang’an—”
The words trailed off. Xiaying suddenly stopped, realizing something, and shot a cautious glance toward her mistress on the couch.
Shen Yujiao had been lounging against her pillow, nibbling pastries as she listened to the chatter. When Xiaying abruptly went quiet, her thoughts, too, began to wander—
In all of Chang’an, among the handsome young men Xiaying had seen who could rival Pei Xia, who else but the unruly and free-spirited Xie Wuling?
It had been more than half a month since that day he’d called outside her gate, begging to see her.
Pei Xia had bailed him out of the Dali Temple prison; now that the case was closed, he was likely already on a boat back to Ningzhou.
Good — better that he left early.
Leaving this city of right and wrong behind would be best — for both him and her.
Realizing she had spoken out of turn and stirred unwanted thoughts, Xiaying hurried to change the subject, praising Pei Yi’s bridal beauty: “Fifth Young Lady looked stunning today — a hibiscus face, willow-leaf brows, cherry lips. I heard when the groom came to fetch her, he took one look through the screen and could hardly tear his eyes away!”
Shen Yujiao’s thoughts returned — though not completely — because the mention of the groom, Wang Huanwen, reminded her of someone else:
Pei Tong, the woman sent away to the country estate.
She was still alive — at least, she had to be, before this marriage took place.
It would be inauspicious otherwise.
Did that distant, exiled Pei Tong know today was Pei Yi and Wang Huanwen’s wedding day?
All her scheming and maneuvering — in the end, it had only made another’s wedding gown.
Would she, perhaps, feel even a sliver — just a sliver — of regret?
While Shen Yujiao was lost in her thoughts in the rear courtyard, the front courtyard was a scene of cheerful chaos. The Pei sons and cousins were blocking the gate, teasing the groom with riddles and verse, refusing to let him in until he answered.
Wang Huanwen, being a proper jinshi scholar, handled the poetry easily enough.
But soon they all started shouting, “Brother Shouzhen! Sixth Brother! Let Eldest Brother Pei Xia set the challenge!”
Pei Xia, not wanting to truly make things difficult for the groom, thought for a bit and came up with a question that was just tricky enough.
As expected, Wang Huanwen couldn’t answer right away and frowned in thought, while the Pei boys laughed and jeered: “Come on, think fast! If you miss the lucky hour, you won’t be allowed to take Fifth Lady home!”
In the end, Wang Huanwen still answered correctly and smoothly carried his bride onto the wedding sedan.
The newlyweds, both dressed in brilliant red, departed Yongning Ward amid the cheers of family and friends. Standing among the crowd, Pei Xia found himself lost in thought—remembering the day of his own wedding with Shen Yujiao.
That day, Yuniang, surrounded by Pei family servants, was dressed in full bridal red. A round fan veiled her face—there was the shy reserve of a new bride, but even more, the panic and confusion of someone utterly alone.
For such a momentous event in her life, there had been no elders, no family, no friends. Even the attendants beside her were all from her husband’s household.
She had been frightened, like a fledgling dropped into foreign territory.
Until she saw him. Behind the round fan, those clear eyes suddenly lit up, shining bright and vivid.
Even though she couldn’t speak, her sparkling eyes seemed to say aloud, crisp and clear: “Brother Shouzhen.”
His heart had skipped a beat.
But back then, he’d been too slow to realize—that flash of wonder had a name: heart’s stirring.
—
That night, after returning from the Wang family’s wedding banquet, Pei Xia went straight to the back courtyard.
Shen Yujiao was already in bed, preparing to rest. Hearing unexpected movement outside, she was a little surprised.
When she saw Pei Xia’s pale, handsome face tinged with a faint flush, she assumed he was drunk. She instructed a maid to make hangover soup, threw on a dark blue robe, got out of bed, and poured him a cup of water. “Langjun, why did you drink so much? Did the Wang family press you to drink?”
She held out the cup, but instead of taking it, he caught her slender, snow-white wrist in the candlelight.
Startled, Shen Yujiao looked up—and met the heated gaze in his dark eyes. Her heart gave a tremor.
Seeing that she understood, Pei Xia’s grip tightened slightly, pulling her into his arms.
She landed on his firm, strong thigh, her heart pounding uncontrollably. “My… Langjun…”
Before she could finish asking what’s wrong, he bent down and kissed her.
The rich scent of wine filled the air between their lips; the hand at her waist gripped tighter and tighter, as if he wanted to crush her into his burning embrace.
It was too sudden.
The maid entering with the hangover soup caught sight of the intimate figures by the bed, blushed furiously, and quickly backed out, head bowed.
The lord was indeed drunk—but the Madam had just finished her confinement period!
Anxious, the maid hovered at the door, torn over whether she should fetch Qiao Momo.
Inside, the air was heavy with faint fragrance. When the man buried his face against her neck, Shen Yujiao shivered and hastily caught the hand slipping beneath her robes. “No—no, you can’t! Last time, Momo scolded me for ages!”
“All right, I won’t.”
His hand stilled, but his low voice at her neck was hoarse with restrained desire. “Yuniang… will you call me ‘Brother Shouzhen’?”
“…?” Shen Yujiao blinked, confused.
Pei Xia lifted his head slightly, putting a little distance between them.
Under the hazy candlelight, a flush colored the corners of his eyes; against his elegant, jade-like features, the faint smile he gave her was almost bewitching. “Just once?”
Flirtatious and teasing words—from a man who had always been upright and restrained.
Like an immortal from the high heavens, suddenly fallen into mortal temptation.
Shen Yujiao’s lashes trembled; as if enchanted, her lips parted. “Brother… Shou… Shouzhen.”
The words had barely left her mouth when the darkness in his eyes deepened.
Without giving her a chance to react, he kissed her again.
This time, the kiss was light, tender—careful, as if treating something precious.
“Yuniang…” he murmured against her lips, slow and low.
He really was drunk, Shen Yujiao thought hazily. He’d never liked her calling him that before.
The kiss didn’t last long. Outside, Qiao Momo’s deliberately loud cough broke the silence.
“Madam, the hangover soup is ready. Let the lord drink it quickly!”
Shen Yujiao came to her senses instantly, pushing Pei Xia away, her cheeks flushed pink. “Langjun, if you keep this up, the servants will have something to gossip about.”
At that reminder, a flicker of cold irritation passed through Pei Xia’s dark eyes.
For over twenty years he had lived in strict restraint—only now did he realize that following every rule wasn’t always a virtue.
That night, after drinking the hangover soup, Pei Xia was personally “escorted” out of the back courtyard by Qiao Momo.
Returning to the room, Qiao Momo glanced at her mistress’s reddened lips and the faint bloom of color at her brows and cheeks—she didn’t need to ask to know what had happened.
Frowning for a moment, she cautiously asked, “My lady, the master is in his prime. Have you considered arranging a maid to serve in his rooms?”
Shen Yujiao stared, taken aback.
Qiao Momo knew how the young madam felt—newlywed affection made a woman reluctant to share her husband. But the Shen family’s downfall had been so sudden that she’d never had the chance to explain certain things fully. Now she had to bring it up.
“I’ve told you before, my lady—you’re the mistress of the house. Concubines and bed-servants are nothing more than playthings. You needn’t lower yourself to compete with them. But what I didn’t say is—sometimes, letting the master take a concubine is not only to satisfy a man’s desires; it can also benefit you.”
Shen Yujiao frowned. “For the reputation of being a virtuous, unjealous wife?”
“That’s one reason.”
“To continue the family line?”
“Ha! That’s hardly a benefit. You can bear children yourself—if you can, your sons will be legitimate and respected. Why let concubines’ sons and daughters divide the family estate with yours?”
“But didn’t you once tell me,” Shen Yujiao countered, “that a family prospers only by having many descendants?”
“Ahem,” Qiao Momo coughed lightly. “That was back before you were married. Of course I had to teach you the proper grand principles then. But now—there’s no one else here, and you already have a legitimate son. You’re still so young…”
So it turned out that these elderly women had two sets of sayings—one for unmarried girls, and another for married women.
“I really don’t see what’s so good about that,” Shen Yujiao said.
“My silly lady,” Qiao Momo sighed, looking at her, “it’s all for your own body.”
She continued, “Once a man touches you, you’ll soon have another baby in your belly. After the ordeal you’ve just suffered, you’ll need at least half a year to recover. No—if you ask me, better to wait two full years, until little Di can walk and talk, before thinking about having another. They say ‘the more children, the more blessings,’ but too many births ruin a woman’s body… Yet you can’t exactly tell your husband not to touch you either, can you? And if you take contraceptive medicine after sleeping together, that harms your health too.”
Frequent childbirth damaged the body, giving birth carried great risks, and contraceptive medicines were still medicines—three parts poison—too much of them also hurt one’s health.
That was why concubines were taken—to help the main wife bear some of the risks of childbirth.
Shen Yujiao had never thought about it from that angle. She’d always believed taking concubines was simply to satisfy a man’s lust.
“Do you know Master Qi from Marquis Yongwei’s household?” Qiao Momo asked. “His first two wives both died in childbirth. The third one he married later—after she gave birth to the heir—let him take three concubines right away. Everyone praises her for being virtuous and not jealous, but the nurse who serves her is an old friend of mine, and she told me—jealous she may be, but she’s even more afraid of dying.”
“There’s such a story?” Shen Yujiao widened her eyes, thinking back to when she’d seen Madam Qi before.
Everyone praised that lady’s good fortune—not only had she overcome Lord Qi’s ‘wife-starving fate,’ but she’d even given birth to a legitimate son. How lucky she seemed! Yet who would’ve thought she had once worried and feared for her life like that.
“Anyway, my lady, just think it through carefully yourself,” Qiao Momo said.
She didn’t want other women meddling between husband and wife either—but seeing how close the young couple was, unable to keep their hands off each other even during her postpartum confinement, she could hardly imagine what things would be like once the confinement ended. Heaven help them if she got pregnant again within half a year! Qiao Momo dared not even picture it.
So she leaned close and whispered many contraceptive tricks to Shen Yujiao: “Count your days carefully… and when it’s almost that time… go out…”
By the time she was done, Shen Yujiao’s face was scarlet, her lips tightly pressed together.
Just a year ago, she had racked her brains trying to get pregnant—now she was figuring out how to avoid it…
Truly absurd.
—
The next day, Pei Xia sobered up and went to the back courtyard to see his wife and child.
The moment Shen Yujiao saw him, her face flushed red, and her eyes flickered away.
Pei Xia assumed she was still shaken by his rash behavior the night before. He was about to explain when she stuffed the baby into his arms and buried her head in the account book on the table, the abacus beads clacking so fast they might spark.
Busy. Terribly busy. Extremely busy.
Pei Xia: “…”
Truly, wine misleads men.
—
A few days later, Pei Yi returned home with her new husband. Pei Xia received Wang Huanwen in the front hall, while Pei Yi, her brows blooming with youthful beauty, chatted with Shen Yujiao.
It had only been three days since the wedding, yet the young girl had already become a married woman—the change in her temperament was unmistakable.
Looking at the shy new bride, Shen Yujiao suddenly saw her former self.
She thought to herself—how sweetly bashful, how full of tender affection such a little wife could be. Just how cold and unfeeling must Pei Xia’s heart have been back then, to treat her with such indifference?
A man’s heart—truly hard to fathom.
—
Spring winds brushed the willows green, and after another misty spring rain, April arrived.
At the beginning of April, the imperial examination results were posted. From Hedong, Pei Xia’s name stood among the top three.
Also on the list was Pei Silang from the Pei family’s second branch—though outside the top three, he had still passed.
The next day, the top scholars were summoned to court to be received by the Emperor.
Pei Xia possessed the talent of a top scholar and the looks of a flower—yet in the end, he was appointed tanhua*.
* third place
Among the top three, the other two—one had a round head, a round face, and a round mind; the other was over forty with graying hair. Emperor Zhaoning looked them over and simply could not bring himself, in good conscience, to give the tanhua title to either of them.
Thus, Pei Xia of Hedong was personally chosen as tanhua and entered the Hanlin Academy.
That same day, Emperor Zhaoning bestowed him a special favor: an imperial decree was sent to Lingnan, pardoning the entire family of former Minister of Works Shen Hui, erasing their criminal records, and permitting their return to the capital.
