The Daily Life of a Depressed Salted Fish Chapter 24

The osmanthus banquet was held at noon the next day.

The Imperial Garden was filled with beautiful palace maids, and many noble ladies’ carriages were parked at the palace gate. The maidservants helped their ladies alight, and as they walked into the palace, each one looked graceful, dignified, and well-mannered.

Inside the Taiji Hall, all was quiet.

When Jiang Wu woke up, he found Yin Wuzhi sitting at the bedside, quietly watching him.

Perhaps because he had been beaten again the day before, Yin Wuzhi looked pale today. Jiang Wu wanted to ask him something, but he was too lazy to speak, so he simply turned his eyes to meet his gaze.

“If His Majesty really doesn’t want to attend the osmanthus banquet, I have a solution.”

Jiang Wu said arrogantly, “If I don’t want to go, I won’t go. I don’t need any solutions.”

Such an infuriating way to talk.

Yin Wuzhi said, “If I forcibly carry you there, what will you do?”

“Beat you.”

“What if I’m willing to endure that beating, just to carry you there? What will you do then?”

“…” The osmanthus banquet was arranged by the Great Empress Dowager. If Yin Wuzhi forcibly brought him there, she would surely be pleased, and aside from beating Yin Wuzhi to vent his frustration, Jiang Wu wouldn’t be able to do much else.

Jiang Wu thought for a moment and said, “Then I’ll strip off your clothes…”

“Tie me up and throw me on the dragon bed?” Yin Wuzhi cut in. “No matter what, if I’m determined to take you there, what then?”

Jiang Wu was at a loss for words.

Yin Wuzhi seemed like a different person, fearless of anything. Then again, it was just a small matter, and Jiang Wu couldn’t quite understand why Yin Wuzhi was so determined.

After successfully confusing him, Yin Wuzhi lowered his voice, “Everything just now was hypothetical. If His Majesty truly doesn’t want to go, I have another solution.”

Jiang Wu was suspicious.

“His Majesty could hide in the study and claim to be too busy with state affairs. That might allow you to avoid it.”

This scoundrel just wanted to trick him into working.

Jiang Wu changed his mind: “I’ll go.”

“… What?”

“I’ll go to the osmanthus banquet.” At worst, he’d find somewhere else to daydream. It was better than staying in the study with Yin Wuzhi.

Yin Wuzhi quickly realized the root of the issue: “In the study, you can sleep, do whatever you want. I won’t force you.”

Jiang Wu didn’t believe him: “I want to attend the osmanthus banquet.”

As expected, Yin Shizi was truly reliable in his actions. Qi Hanmiao, who had come to check on whether the emperor had sobered up, was surprised to hear this statement and immediately called out, “Servants, assist the emperor in getting dressed.”

Jiang Wu wasn’t one to wear proper clothes willingly. Usually, when staying in the Taiji Palace, he wore only a soft, lightweight, cotton-lined robe that was comfortable and almost weightless. If he had to go out, at most he would drape a thick cloak over himself, loosely, showing his laziness.

In the past, Yin Wuzhi would have insisted on having his hair tied up properly because, as the emperor, appearance was of utmost importance, and being so disheveled was unbecoming of his status. But today, he said nothing, and naturally, no one else dared to upset the emperor either.

Not only did he not say anything, but when wiping Jiang Wu’s face and hands, Yin Wuzhi deliberately skipped his drowsy eyes, leaving behind the secretion at the base of his eyelashes.

Perhaps because his eyes hadn’t been completely cleaned, Jiang Wu kept yawning lazily as he was pushed out.

In this state, let’s see which girl could take a liking to him.

The breeze carried the fragrance of osmanthus, and the imperial garden echoed with the playful laughter of young women. The Great Empress Dowager sat in the main seat, with Empress Dowager Wen and Empress Dowager Yao on either side, chatting softly with other noble ladies.

Today, many women had brought their daughters along. Everyone was well aware of the true purpose of the osmanthus banquet, but of course, such matters were not something the young girls could speak of openly. While their elders conversed, the girls gathered around the ancient osmanthus tree, lifting their faces to inhale the garden’s fragrance.

When Jiang Wu was pushed over, he happened to hear a young woman in a light pink dress softly reciting, “Pale yellow and soft, distant and aloof, it leaves only its fragrance behind. No need for bright reds or greens; it’s naturally the finest of flowers.”

“No wonder she’s the youngest daughter of Qiu Shangshu. Such remarkable literary talent.” Qi Hanmiao, remembering the day’s mission, diligently began praising her, and then asked for the emperor’s opinion: “Your Majesty, what do you think?”

Jiang Wu didn’t even lift his head and said, “Hmm.”

“What does Your Majesty think of this lady’s appearance…” Before Qi Hanmiao could finish his sentence, he was interrupted by a voice nearby: “Golden stamens dense with dew, jade-green branches casting cool shadows. Tonight, I shall pick from the moonlit palace; no earthly fragrance compares.”

Qi Hanmiao: “?”

Why was the Shizi joining in on this?

The young women all turned their heads, eyes lighting up: “Who is this?”

“He seems to be the Yin Shizi.”

“The one summoned by the emperor?” The girls grew visibly excited—what a handsome man!

And then, sneaking a glance at the emperor seated below, their hearts began to race. They hadn’t expected the emperor to be such a beauty too.

They all bowed gracefully. Someone gently nudged Qiu Wuxia and whispered, “The emperor is testing your literary talents through the Shizi.”

Qiu Wuxia blushed slightly and whispered back, “It was just a spur-of-the-moment recitation. I hope the emperor isn’t laughing at me.”

“Ah,” one of the ladies noticed the attention this exchange was garnering, and soon, the Great Empress Dowager, amused, joined in. “He’s a military man; what are you afraid of?”

Today’s banquet was, after all, about finding a bride for Jiang Wu, and the Great Empress Dowager had been worried about how to direct the emperor’s attention. Now that Yin Wuzhi was helping out, and Qiu Wuxia seemed perfect in terms of background, demeanor, and looks, this was a welcome development.

She smiled and gave Yin Wuzhi an encouraging glance.

Well done. Once the emperor finds a woman he likes, he won’t keep you in the palace any longer.

Qiu Wuxia instinctively glanced at Jiang Wu. He was slumped lazily in his wheelchair, looking exquisite yet indifferent, but his slightly teary eyes added a touch of melancholy beauty.

She quickly withdrew her gaze, racking her brain to come up with more lines to praise the osmanthus: “Such flowers don’t shy from the season, their golden seeds thickly scattered. They bloom in the finest of autumn, spreading their quiet fragrance.”

“Wonderful!” The Great Empress Dowager laughed heartily. “As expected of Qiu Shangshu’s daughter.”

Qi Hanmiao nodded enthusiastically, adding, “Indeed, indeed, Your Majesty, see how intelligent and graceful Miss Qiu is?”

Jiang Wu slowly lifted his head to look at Qiu Wuxia.

He looked up, he noticed her! The Great Empress Dowager, delighted, tapped her cane on the ground. Excellent, this is all thanks to Yin Wuzhi. He’ll be rewarded later.

Qiu Wuxia held her breath under his gaze, subconsciously clenching her fingers, feeling incredibly nervous.

Yin Wuzhi’s face darkened. “The fragrance is no longer discernible, snow blossoms scatter on the ground. Only green leaves remain, offering shade beneath.”

Qiu Wuxia was stunned—he was still going?

The Great Empress Dowager was also taken aback but quickly regained her composure. Although Qiu Wuxia had caught the emperor’s attention, it wasn’t enough to leave a lasting impression. It seemed that Yin Wuzhi was going to help all the way.

She turned to Qiu Wuxia, reassuring her, “Don’t be afraid of him.”

Though Qiu Wuxia was nervous, she had prepared for this occasion and had memorized some poems about osmanthus. However, she hadn’t remembered much, and under the pressure of everyone watching, she could only continue awkwardly: “Though not planted in the palace of silver, nor moved to the jade halls, its branches bloom with endless moonlight, filling autumn with fragrant flowers.”

As applause erupted, Qiu Wuxia breathed a sigh of relief, hoping that this would finally be enough.

She sneaked another glance at Jiang Wu.

He yawned.

Amidst the cheers, Yin Wuzhi spoke again: “The osmanthus bloomed overnight, its fragrance carried by the wind and dew across the cliffs. Though autumn passes again and again, the moon still lingers, and one remains in its center.”

The Great Empress Dowager: “?”

This child is thorough. She felt that enough had been done to highlight Qiu Wuxia, and the emperor should have already taken note of her. Perhaps it was time to shift his attention elsewhere.

Qiu Wuxia felt like she was being put on a roasting rack. “In the golden valley gardens, who knows how many families compete to plant peach and plum trees for their spring blooms, their spring blooms, their spring blooms… No one, no one can compare to the skill of the moon—planting osmanthus in the courtyard center.”

Yin Wuzhi corrected her, “No one can compare to the heavenly craftsmanship—planting osmanthus in the heart of the moon.”

Qiu Wuxia: “…”

He, he knows more than I do.

In the midst of the awkward silence, Qi Hanmiao glanced between the Shizi and Miss Qiu.

The Great Empress Dowager also realized something was off—she had intended for Yin Wuzhi to highlight Qiu Wuxia’s talents, not outshine her.

Yin Wuzhi recited, “The osmanthus trees are so lush they seem to flow, their roots naturally seek the moon. The east wind blows golden grains of osmanthus, scattering riches upon the human world in autumn.”

Tears welled up in Qiu Wuxia’s eyes; she was done for.

Yin Wuzhi continued, “In the courtyard, autumn osmanthus casts a cool shadow, layers of deep green guarding the golden flowers. We humbly welcome both palaces to this elegant gathering, where the fragrant liquor rises as richly as the scent of the osmanthus.”

Qiu Wuxia’s tears fell in streams.

Yin Wuzhi showed no mercy: “On the hidden mountain, the osmanthus tree alone enjoys the coolness of autumn. Facing the moon’s reflection, it quietly absorbs the fragrance of the heavens.”

…She had lost at poetry to a military general.

And in front of the emperor, she’d left a very poor impression.

Overwhelmed with sorrow, Qiu Wuxia burst into sobs and ran away, covering her face.

The wind rustled the treetops, and the fragrance of osmanthus filled the garden, leaving the crowd with mixed emotions.

Jiang Wu glanced around and saw that the garden was full of women. Even if he were dull, he could understand what was going on.

Did the historical Jiang Wu have concubines? He vaguely recalled an empress… Was her surname Qiu?

He couldn’t remember.

But it didn’t matter.

What was important was that more performances like the one just now would continue.

He couldn’t take it anymore; he wanted to disappear.

“Yin Wuzhi.”

“Yes?”

“Take me to chase after her.”

This statement instantly lit up the Great Empress Dowager’s eyes. She stepped in front of Jiang Wu and, upon seeing the state of his tear-streaked eyes, her expression changed.

She grabbed a cloth and wiped his face clean, especially around the eyes. Only then did she say, “Go.”

Tears welled up in Jiang Wu’s eyes from the harsh wiping, making his eyes look even redder and more pitiful.

A group of noble ladies glanced sideways at him, clearly moved.

Yin Wuzhi, with a stony face, pushed Jiang Wu out of the crowd and over to the moat. He asked, “Where should we go to find her?”

“Anywhere.”

The branches nearby stirred, and a young woman who had been crouching on a rock timidly poked her head out.

Yin Wuzhi, making up an excuse, said, “Earlier, His Majesty instructed me to test her literary skills. Was His Majesty satisfied with the result?”

The gloomy Jiang Wu: “?”

Yin Wuzhi squatted down beside him and, noticing his red-rimmed eyes, asked, “Not too great? Not fond of her?”

“…??”

“So, what kind of woman does His Majesty like? One with extraordinary literary talents?”

Qiu Wuxia, still sniffling, strained to listen. Extraordinary literary talents? Was that a reference to her poetry? She vowed to study harder. From now on, she’d memorize half a poem each day, 170 poems a year, and continue this habit until the day she died.

“Oh, you don’t like women who just recite poetry,” Yin Wuzhi continued, holding Jiang Wu’s hand. “You like someone who can both recite poetry and lift you up, right?”

“…?” Jiang Wu stared blankly. What are you rambling about?

Yin Wuzhi’s fingers brushed Jiang Wu’s palm. “Someone strong? Skilled in martial arts? Hmm?”

Qiu Wuxia was deflated. She realized, in this lifetime, she could never become someone the emperor liked.

“I… Can I try?”

Qiu Wuxia poked her head out again.

Yin Wuzhi looked expressionlessly at the young woman who had suddenly jumped out. Earlier, he had seen her running after Qiu Wuxia and assumed she was a friend, so he hadn’t paid much attention.

“Greetings, Your Majesty,” the young woman said, lifting her skirt as she stepped in front of Jiang Wu, utterly enchanted by his red, rabbit-like eyes. This is the emperor, the Son of Heaven!

Lowering her head, she curtsied nervously, saying, “My father is Zuo Wuhou, and my brother serves as an assistant minister in the Ministry of War. My name is Zuo Xiaochan.”

“I’ve learned martial arts and am quite strong. Although I can’t recite poetry, I can learn.”

“So,” she asked timidly, “may I try lifting His Majesty?”

“Is that alright?”