The Daily Life of a Depressed Salted Fish Chapter 5

The despondent monarch collapsed back onto the bed like a pile of mud.

His brows were furrowed deeply, his mouth curved downward, his long eyelashes became damp, and there were teardrops at the corners of his eyes. Even his nose trembled slightly, turning red.

Every tiny expression conveyed the unbearable pain of life.

Yin Wuzhi turned away, looking at Qi Hanmiao.

Qi Hanmiao said, “Maybe give him a quarter of an hour… that’s probably what His Majesty meant.”

Waiting another quarter-hour would bring them to the end of the fourth watch.

Yin Wuzhi stared at the water clock on the table, thinking of the ministers waiting in the rain, his expression growing darker.

This foolish emperor was truly despicable.

On such a rainy day, with so many people arriving before dawn, how could he sleep so soundly, without a single thought for his ministers?

Qi Hanmiao was equally anxious.

He really couldn’t understand how the emperor could sleep like this. Wasn’t he worried about the sentiments of the officials waiting for him? About the stability of the empire?

That quarter-hour felt endlessly long for Yin Wuzhi and Qi Hanmiao.

Yin Wuzhi walked to the door to check the sky. The rain had dimmed the daylight, making it look dark and gloomy outside.

He looked back at Jiang Wu, whose crumpled face had relaxed into calmness, clearly having fallen back asleep.

He returned to the bedside, keeping a close eye on the water clock.

As soon as the quarter-hour passed, he immediately yanked off the blanket and coldly said, “Time’s up.”

If it weren’t for his aging father and teacher waiting in the rain, he wouldn’t have cared how long Jiang Wu wanted to laze around.

The blanketless fool curled up on the bed.

He distinctly remembered getting up, washing, and going to court—how was he still lying here?

Feeling confused, the despondent monarch doubted reality, convinced he must have already gotten up.

“Your Ma-jes-ty.”

Yin Wuzhi’s voice was cold and menacing, each word landing heavily.

Alright, this was real. What he had just experienced was a dream.

Jiang Wu’s eyelashes fluttered as he said, “Beloved Minister Yin, I order you to attend court in my place.”

“Ridiculous!”

“…,” Jiang Wu closed his eyes again and finally resigned himself to reality, “Help me up.”

The restless Yin Shizi finally found something to do. He immediately climbed onto the bed to help him up, but the despondent monarch slumped bonelessly against him. With a stern face, Yin Wuzhi pushed him away, causing him to flop forward weakly.

Yin Wuzhi had no choice but to reach out and grip Jiang Wu’s shoulder, using the strength of his arm to support him.

The palace servants waiting outside entered in a line. Some carried basins of water, others held towels, tea, dragon robes, headpieces, and jade hooks… all kneeling before the dragon bed.

Qi Hanmiao stepped forward with the tea: “Your Majesty, please rinse your mouth with the fragrant tea.”

Jiang Wu, slumped with his head down, opened his mouth.

Qi Hanmiao: “…”

How was he supposed to feed him like this?

Yin Wuzhi, his brows furrowed in frustration, couldn’t bear to watch any longer. He moved his arm away from supporting Jiang Wu, who promptly leaned back against his chest, making it easier to pour the tea.

“Your Majesty, Your Majesty, please don’t swallow it.”

Afterward came the face-washing and hand-wiping. When it was time to put on the dragon robe, Yin Wuzhi had to help pull it on several times. Finally, they managed to get him dressed on the bed, and then someone came to comb his hair.

Throughout the entire process, Jiang Wu remained as lifeless as a doll, allowing others to move him around. His loose hair was combed to the top of his head. As someone began placing the imperial crown on him, Jiang Wu muttered dejectedly, “It’s heavy.”

It was indeed extremely heavy.

He couldn’t understand why humans insisted on burdening the emperor with such cumbersome items. For example, the dragon robe he wore was intricately embroidered, likely taking countless hours and threads to create, and felt as heavy as armor.

The crown was crafted from jade, gold, and silver, making it nearly impossible to lift his head once it was placed on.

After being fully dressed, Jiang Wu could neither sit nor stand comfortably, with only one thought in his mind: heavy, so heavy, unbearably heavy.

“Your Majesty, please endure it a bit longer; the morning court session will be over soon,” Qi Hanmiao consoled him, feeling pity. Jiang Wu’s voice was almost muffled under the weight of his attire: “I can’t walk.”

“Then, I’ll call the guards to carry you to the palanquin.”

Yin Wuzhi’s ears twitched, his gaze suddenly becoming sharp.

A black-clad figure silently appeared in the room.

Qi Hanmiao didn’t seem surprised and said, “Sixteen, hurry up, don’t let His Majesty miss the morning court.”

The black-clad man moved without hesitation, approaching Jiang Wu and lifting him onto the palanquin.

The palanquin was covered with a large canopy. Due to the cold weather, wind-blocking curtains hung on both sides. Jiang Wu lazily nestled inside, his figure becoming vague and indistinct.

Yin Wuzhi held an umbrella as he walked alongside the palanquin.

The palace grounds were smooth, but with the rain continuing, a thin layer of water flowed across the ground. The boots quickly became damp, and the cold wetness could be felt beneath his feet.

But that was only the case for Yin Wuzhi and the others.

Jiang Wu’s feet remained perfectly clean, untouched by dust.

He slowly opened his eyes.

Through the gaps in the swaying curtains, he could see the sky was still overcast. Although the sunlight couldn’t penetrate the clouds, it still brought light to the world.

He raised his hand to rub his eyes, but it felt too heavy, so he just blinked his eyelashes twice.

His body still felt tired, and his temples throbbed, but his mind was starting to clear a bit.

He could hear the sloshing sound of boots in the water. The palanquin bearers were likely well-trained, moving quickly and steadily, as Jiang Wu didn’t feel the slightest jolt.

The palanquin soon arrived in front of the Long Gate of Chengde Hall.

Qi Hanmiao lifted the curtains, and Jiang Wu saw the familiar throne, made entirely of pure gold, with every detail meticulously crafted by artisans to perfection.

The palace had a team of craftsmen dedicated to maintaining and cleaning the throne, ensuring it remained grand and resplendent.

But in reality, the throne was far from comfortable.

Jiang Wu, who had only sat on it three times, knew that it was always cold and hard, only slightly better than sitting on ice.

The view, of course, was excellent. From the throne, one could observe every official clearly, seeing these prominent figures, who commanded the winds and rains outside, bow at his feet and await his orders. It sounded impressive.

But if a north or south wind blew, it would enter through the main gate, chilling the person sitting high up. If an east or west wind blew, the cold would come through the Long Gate, blowing straight at Jiang Wu… chilling him to the bone.

In short, from any angle, Jiang Wu found nothing appealing about the throne.

He glanced at Yin Wuzhi.

What would this man think if he ever ascended the throne?

The black-clad man appeared once more beside Jiang Wu, bowing deeply before extending his hands towards him.

“Wait,” Jiang Wu stopped him, “let Beloved Minister Yin do it.”

The black-clad man hesitated for a moment, then bowed again before silently disappearing.

Yin Wuzhi’s face turned pale.

Inside the hall stood his father and teacher, as well as colleagues and friends. Perhaps today they would condemn Jiang Wu for forcing him into the palace. If he showed any sign of submission to Jiang Wu now, what would his family think?

“You,” Jiang Wu commanded, leaving no room for refusal, “carry me up there.”

Yin Wuzhi: “…”

“Or else, I’ll…” Jiang Wu’s eyes gleamed as he slowly added, “throw King Dingnan into the dungeon.”

Officials were naturally not allowed to carry weapons in court. The palace was Jiang Wu’s domain, and if he truly were as foolish as this, King Dingnan would have no choice but to surrender.

However, if Jiang Wu really did that, it would mean he had no desire to keep his kingdom. This baseless provocation weighed heavily on Yin Wuzhi’s mind. He couldn’t understand what the Yin family had done to anger Jiang Wu so much.

“For what reason?”

“Do I need a reason to imprison someone?” Jiang Wu lazily replied, “Even to kill someone, it only depends on my mood.”

If he actually killed King Dingnan, the nation would fall into chaos. Yin Wuzhi didn’t believe it for a second: “You wouldn’t dare.”

When these two clashed, the tension became overwhelming. Everyone, including Qi Hanmiao, instinctively held their breath.

Jiang Wu’s eyelashes didn’t move at all.

He simply stared silently at Yin Wuzhi.

Yin Wuzhi’s breathing gradually became more tense.

Jiang Wu’s eyes were inorganic, like lifeless crystals or glass—neither indifferent nor cruel, nor provocative or intimidating.

Like a stone by the roadside, it just sat there, regardless of whether you vented your anger at it or ignored it. It remained calm and unmoving, just a simple presence.

Jiang Wu seemed to fear nothing—neither the collapse of mountains and rivers, nor the destruction of families, nor killing or facing consequences.

Yin Wuzhi, having seen many fearless people on the battlefield, knew that even those who were not afraid of death could fear harm to their family, the humiliation of their compatriots, or the suffering of their descendants.

But Jiang Wu did not care.

In the face of fierce, cruel, and terrifying enemies on the battlefield, those with blue faces and fangs were not as frightening as the handsome and delicate emperor before him.

Yin Wuzhi believed Jiang Wu could do it.

He stepped forward and lifted Jiang Wu up.

Jiang Wu’s arm naturally rested on his shoulder, feeling quite satisfied with himself for successfully intimidating Yin Wuzhi.

Of course, he wouldn’t really kill King Dingnan.

Indeed, Yin Wuzhi was right; he could kill King Dingnan and accept all the consequences that came with it. He didn’t care about the destruction of mountains and rivers or the ruin of families.

But being able to do it doesn’t mean he would actually do it. It’s like many people could easily kill a cat without feeling guilty, but what’s the point of killing?

Jiang Wu looked at Yin Wuzhi’s face, his fingers slightly moving on Yin’s shoulder, his thumb brushing past his ear.

The latter tilted his head to avoid it.

Really, King Dingnan was bound to die, whether sooner or later, whether killed or dying of old age—what difference did it make?

Look at him, getting so scared.

A faint commotion arose in the Chengde Hall.

King Dingnan’s face turned pale.

The dim-witted emperor, the dim-witted emperor, the dim-witted emperor.

What did he think of my son? A dock worker? Or a palace eunuch?

His beard trembled slightly, and he forced himself to restrain his emotions to avoid losing his composure in Chengde Hall.

Instinctively, he knelt with everyone else and shouted, “Your servant greets His Majesty—”

“Everyone, rise.” Jiang Wu, seated on the dragon throne, spoke indifferently and casually hooked Yin Wuzhi’s sleeve, making it impossible for him to leave.

The officials straightened up in a rustling manner. When King Dingnan raised his eyes, he saw the dim-witted emperor tracing along Yin Wuzhi’s sleeve, reaching his fingers.

King Dingnan: “……”

He was so angry he puffed out his beard.

“Beloved Minister Yin,” Jiang Wu, holding Yin Wuzhi’s hand, said seriously, “you stay here.”

Look at your officials, your Chengde Hall, your talented people and country.

“Listen carefully to what is discussed today and take note.”

“After returning, you will report to me.”

Yin Wuzhi: “?”

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