The Daily Life of a Depressed Salted Fish Chapter 59

After sending off the dejected Qi Hanmiao, whose pride had been hurt, Yin Wuzhi indeed brought out a measuring tape.

The noodle-like emperor, as always, was soft and boneless, yielding to any action. Yin Wuzhi pressed him down to measure his width, then his length, and finally even lifted his hands and feet to measure them. Satisfied, he put him back in place and said, “I’m wider than Your Majesty, longer than Your Majesty, and my hands and feet are bigger than Yours. If I’m little, then Your Majesty must be tiny.”

The Pessimist: “…”

How could there be someone this boring in the world?

Jiang Wu naturally wasn’t bothered to argue with such a person. “Did you notice anything from Sixteen’s retelling?”

“A bit.”

“?”

“I… don’t dare say.”

“??”

“After all, that’s Your Majesty’s mother…” Yin Wuzhi glanced at his expression cautiously. “I don’t dare stir up trouble.”

“…” How is Yin Wuzhi so timid? Does he not yet realize how little I care for Yao Ji? Jiang Wu said, “You may speak freely.”

“I still don’t dare.”

“…Why?”

“Your Majesty is the ruler of this nation, and that person is your birth mother. In terms of status and reality, she’s far closer to you than I could ever be.”

That was true enough. How could Yin Wuzhi possibly know that Jiang Wu was no longer Yao Ji’s actual son, but a wandering soul from thousands of years in the future?

Jiang Wu said again, “I absolve you of any blame.”

Yin Wuzhi hesitated.

Jiang Wu: “?”

“I’m not confident.”

Jiang Wu understood.

If even pardoning him wasn’t enough to give confidence, it was clear Yin Wuzhi simply didn’t want to say it. Jiang Wu couldn’t be bothered to dig deeper.

He was ready to let the topic drop when Yin Wuzhi suddenly spoke again, “Empress Dowager Yao left behind a maid. Would Your Majesty like to meet her?”

“Sure.”

Yin Wuzhi said, “It seems Empress Dowager Yao’s person is still more important.”

Jiang Wu finally understood.

Yin Wuzhi’s reluctance to speak wasn’t because he feared upsetting Yao Ji—it was because he was seeking reassurance for himself.

He said, “Yin Wuzhi.”

Yin Wuzhi, somewhat expectant: “Yes?”

“Tash, get lost.”

“…” Yin Wuzhi pursed his lips and twirled Jiang Wu’s long hair in his fingers. “Your Majesty, can’t you indulge me just a little?”

Jiang Wu closed one eye, leaving the other half-open.

Yin Wuzhi’s fingers grazed his lashes as he said, “You always blame me for being thin-skinned. How can I be bold when you’re so harsh?”

Jiang Wu thought it over carefully. It’s true—Yin Wuzhi used to be more timid, crying or fleeing at the slightest thing. But lately, Jiang Wu had been kinder to him, and Yin Wuzhi had indeed grown bolder.

If you’re too kind to someone, they’ll start calculating against you like King Xiang did.

In most cases, excessive kindness truly does nurture ungratefulness.

He said, “Of course, you’re more important than my mother.”

Yin Wuzhi smiled, unable to resist planting a kiss on his face, then on his lashes, before saying, “I did discover something, but I need to confirm it first before I can give Your Majesty a clear answer.”

As he spoke, he took out a piece of paper. “But I can show you this for now—these are some doubts I’ve noted.”

Realizing this would require him to think, Jiang Wu said, “No need. I’ll leave the matter entirely in your hands.”

Then he added, “There’s a hidden compartment by my bedside. Open it, and you’ll find a decree to mobilize the Yinlong Guards. Use it whenever necessary.”

Yin Wuzhi was shocked. “The… the Yinlong Guards?”

The Yinlong Guards, as the name suggests, were the emperor’s secret shadow guards. Sixteen was one of them. Apart from a few who were tasked with protecting the emperor directly, the rest were assigned various duties across the empire.

These men were true death warriors. They had no names, only numbers. When one died, another took their place. For example, Sixteen clearly wasn’t actually the sixteenth of his generation—he likely inherited the number when the previous Sixteen perished.

Yin Wuzhi’s expression shifted. “Your Majesty, you’re entrusting these people… to me?”

“Mother does not have them.”

Before Jiang Wu finished speaking, Yin Wuzhi pulled him into a tight embrace.

Honestly, this position—lying in bed and being lifted by the head—wasn’t particularly comfortable.

Yin Wuzhi seemed to be using great force to hold him, yet the embrace wasn’t actually that tight. Jiang Wu could feel the warmth of Yin Wuzhi’s palm as it threaded through his hair.

Yin Wuzhi’s eyes were dark and filled with murderous intent. “I swear, I won’t let anyone have the chance to harm Your Majesty.”

As for the maid Empress Dowager Yao sent, she never even got the chance to meet Jiang Wu. On her first day at Taiji Hall, Yin Wuzhi sent her to sweep the courtyard.

Chen Ziyan even commented to Yin Wuzhi, “Isn’t it a waste to leave such a pretty little maid outside?”

Yin Wuzhi replied mercilessly, “Letting her stay inside would be like a cow chewing on peonies.”

Chen Ziyan asked, “Is the emperor the cow or the peony?”

“…Mind your own business.”

“The Great Empress Dowager says she’ll be taking His Majesty to Shengguo Temple to offer prayers in the coming days. Are you going too?”

“Of course, I must protect His Majesty.”

“Does His Majesty really need your protection?” Chen Ziyan scoffed. “Weren’t you eager to return to the army and train the soldiers?”

“The emperor’s safety concerns the entire nation. No one around him is as skilled as I am.”

“Even Leader Qiu isn’t better than you?”

“He’s only been on the battlefield for a few years—he doesn’t have as much experience killing as I do.”

Chen Ziyan shook his head. “You’re just being stubborn.”

Yin Wuzhi lowered his eyelashes and, after a moment, turned his face and said to him, “Don’t tell my father.”

Chen Ziyan understood and then darkened his eyes slightly. “Regardless, as your senior, I must remind you: some peonies are not easily plucked by people like us. You… should think it over carefully.”

Yin Wuzhi, flipping through his book, replied, “Mm.”

Yao Ji hadn’t expected Yin Wuzhi to be so domineering. The person she had arranged to be by the emperor’s side hadn’t even had the chance to speak to him in the half-month that had passed.

The maid tearfully complained, “The shizi is so high-handed. Every night he drives everyone away. Who knows what kind of spell he’s using to charm His Majesty? He makes me go outside to sweep the courtyard every night. Even when I finish cleaning, he says it’s not clean enough and makes me sweep again. After I’ve obeyed and swept everything, I finally sneak back into Taiji Hall only to find His Majesty already asleep… His Majesty, so strong and mighty, now sleeps all the time. It must be that fox spirit who has drained him dry.”

Seeing Yao Ji’s dark expression, the maid immediately trembled and lowered her head.

After a moment of silence, Yao Ji said, “In a little while, when the Great Empress Dowager takes His Majesty to Shengguo Temple to offer prayers, you will accompany me there.”

Yin Wuzhi may be formidable, but he can’t bear children. With the emperor’s temperament, once there’s an heir, he certainly won’t neglect the matter.

It wasn’t surprising that Yao Ji would go to offer prayers. Both the Great Empress Dowager and Empress Dowager Wen were praying for the emperor’s well-being, and leaving out his birth mother would have been unseemly.

By mid-March, the Ministry of Rites had already made preparations. On the day of departure, Jiang Wu was woken up before dawn and groomed. As the sky began to brighten, he was dressed and placed in the imperial carriage.

This journey was a grand occasion. According to the Great Empress Dowager’s plan, court was to be suspended for a month, giving ample time for the emperor and the monks to engage in discussions and clear any doubts.

Jiang Wu himself didn’t really want to go. After all, the trip would take at least two days of tiring travel, but the thought of not having to attend court for an entire month made it seem worth it, so he agreed.

Of course, even if he hadn’t agreed, there wasn’t much he could do. The Great Empress Dowager’s decree had already been announced to the officials, who wholeheartedly supported the idea, praising it as being for the emperor’s health… Jiang Wu guessed they, too, were just looking forward to a break.

Under the shade of large yellow canopies, the emperor’s procession slowly made its way out of the city gates.

This journey was so ceremonious that six generals were assigned to guard the emperor, all heavily armed and stationed around the imperial carriage. Yin Wuzhi, as a junior general, was stationed further out. From his perspective, the grand imperial carriage embroidered with auspicious patterns was surrounded in the center. King Dingnan and Marquis Zuo Wu were leading the horses, donned in armor. Iron armor, cavalry, archers, red-tasseled spears—all visible.

And countless invisible shadows followed closely, guarding the perimeter.

Once they passed the city gates, everyone noticeably became more vigilant.

During a reorganization of the formation, King Dingnan glanced at Yin Wuzhi, whispered a few words to someone nearby, and rode over, his voice stern, “Yin Shu.”

Yin Wuzhi immediately snapped back to attention, “Father.”

“You’ve been distracted since we left the palace. We’ve already left the capital, and you’re still not focused!”

His father’s face was stern and dignified. Yin Wuzhi immediately replied, “Yes, sir.”

King Dingnan gave him a cold look for a few moments and said, “I don’t care what’s on your mind—set it aside. From now until we return to the capital, you are nothing but a junior general responsible for protecting the emperor.”

“Yes, sir.”

“I didn’t hear you.”

“Yes, sir! I obey your command!”

Jiang Wu, hearing the commotion, lazily yawned from inside the carriage.

These father and son are so overzealous—it’s just a prayer trip, not a war. Why make such a fuss?

From a carriage at the rear, a slender, pale hand lifted a thin curtain, and a pair of beautiful eyes fixed on Yin Wuzhi.

As the procession resumed, Jiang Wu tilted his head and, through the fluttering curtain caught by the wind, looked outside.

Yin Wuzhi should have been far behind, and he didn’t see him.

Based on his guess, the guy had probably been thoroughly embarrassed after being scolded in front of so many people, his eyes likely red from humiliation.

But this time, Jiang Wu was wrong. Yin Wuzhi had long become accustomed to the harsh reprimands of the military, where “there are no fathers and sons.” He quickly regained his composure, his eyes scanning his surroundings as he glanced back at Yao Ji’s carriage.

If Yao Ji truly planned to eliminate anyone who knew her secrets, it would surely happen either on the way to the temple or at Shengguo Temple itself.

Jiang Wu lowered his eyes again.

The massive procession of over ten thousand people soon reached the main road. As they turned a corner, the wind once again lifted the window curtain of Jiang Wu’s carriage. He raised his long lashes and, at the bend, saw Yin Wuzhi in silver armor, his broad sword at his side.

His long hair was tucked into his helmet, revealing a clean and striking face. He looked just as sharp as the first time they met, like a blade freshly drawn from its sheath.

Yin Wuzhi also looked his way. Their gazes met briefly, and Jiang Wu leaned back, disappearing from the window.

After a moment of dazed confusion, Yin Wuzhi thought, “!”

If he could lean back, that meant Jiang Wu had been half-sitting up.

The emperor, sitting halfway up, waiting at the bend, just to catch a glimpse of him…

Was… was that it?