The Daily Life of a Depressed Salted Fish Chapter 68

The room fell into a tense silence.

When Yao Ji was summoned, she was somewhat confused. Accompanied by Chang Jinwen, she entered the Great Empress Dowager’s courtyard, asking, “Why has Mother called for us?”

Chang Jinwen shook her head, “They called for us suddenly, so I’m not sure either.”

As they entered, they noticed that all the maids and eunuchs had been dismissed. Yao Ji commented, “Where’s Qin Chuan?”

Empress Dowager Wen replied, “You’ve become overly cautious these past few years.”

After entering the room, the Great Empress Dowager ordered someone to offer seats for the two of them. Yao Ji, however, did not sit down; instead, she took a few steps forward, came in front of Jiang Wu, looked him over from head to toe, and finally asked, “Wu Er, are you all right?”

“Mm.” He was fine now.

“Yao Ji, have a seat,” the Great Empress Dowager spoke up. She couldn’t afford to lose composure in front of the ministers, so she reluctantly moved back and sat down, though she couldn’t help but glance worriedly at Jiang Wu.

Jiang Wu’s fall off the cliff had truly frightened her, but fortunately, he’d returned unharmed. Although she had wanted to visit him, the Great Empress Dowager had again started restricting her from approaching the emperor, so she had no choice but to let it go.

There was a moment of silence in the room before Empress Dowager Wen spoke, “I wonder what business Royal Mother called the two of us here for?”

“Just wait a bit longer.”

Earlier, as they traveled here with the imperial entourage, they moved slowly due to the large number of people, taking an entire day to arrive.

However, the Great Empress Dowager had sent Qin Chuan ahead on a fast horse; going there and back, it should only take two or three hours for him to return with the person.

These few hours were a bit tormenting for Jiang Wu as well, and he said sullenly, “I’m tired.”

“Yin Shu,” the Great Empress Dowager said, “take His Majesty to the back to rest.”

It’s said that people have a certain respect for those close to death; in the dungeons, they even let prisoners sleep well before their execution… no, actually, they let them eat and drink well, but for this morose one, he didn’t need to eat well; sleeping well would be perfect.

This would likely be his last good sleep as a human.

Yin Wuzhi guided him to the back. When he came to carry him, the Pessimist spread his arms wide.

Though he seemed as indifferent as ever, a slight glimmer in his eyes revealed an uncontrollable excitement.

Yin Wuzhi found it amusing.

He was racking his brain here, thinking of how to speak on his behalf, how to break the impasse, yet he laid there looking perfectly at peace, as if he had been waiting for this moment for a long time.

Yin Wuzhi wrapped his arms around his waist, gently placed him on the bed, and Jiang Wu laid down peacefully, the fear that his bandaged hand had caused now entirely gone.

He wondered if, after his death, Yin Wuzhi would still be able to see him. Actually, it didn’t matter much—he figured he could still see Yin Wuzhi…assuming he remained in this time period.

Or maybe, after death, he’d be pulled back to the distant future on Wudao Mountain.

That wasn’t impossible.

Just as Jiang Wu was about to close his eyes, he opened them again.

If he never saw Yin Wuzhi again, he thought, perhaps he would still miss him.

Yin Wuzhi sat at his bedside. “Leaving me makes you this happy?” he asked.

“No,” Jiang Wu replied thoughtfully, “Yin Wuzhi, there’s something I need to tell you.”

“What is it?”

At first, he hadn’t wanted to say anything. He knew that if he did, Yin Wuzhi wouldn’t believe him. It was an absurd explanation, one that couldn’t possibly convince him. That’s why every time Jiang Wu talked about wanting to die, he always used reasons grounded in his current identity.

“Actually, I’m not Jiang Wu.” His voice was soft and slow. For the first time, he showed a serious expression, “I’m a wandering soul. At first, I wasn’t even that—a thing that didn’t know what it was. Back then, I only knew I existed, but I couldn’t hear or see anything, like a human without senses.”

Yin Wuzhi quietly gazed at him, the red mark at the corner of his left eye becoming faintly visible again. “And then?” he asked.

“Then, I could see and hear. Although I couldn’t touch or smell, I knew that my state was probably that of a ghost,” Jiang Wu continued. “I wandered for many years and eventually ended up on a mountain called Wudao Mountain. On the mountain, there was a Daoist temple, and the walls of the temple were covered with flags…”

As he spoke, he suddenly remembered. Yes, the reason the temple walls filled with flags looked familiar was because that Daoist temple had them too.

Actually, it wasn’t just that temple. During his long journey as a wandering spirit, he had also seen temple walls adorned with flags. He drifted past them and, when he drifted back again, many of those temples had been torn down. Only one, which had been turned into a scenic site—Wudao Temple—remained. The reason it was preserved was because behind the temple, on the mountain, knelt a stone figure.

“Flags,” Yin Wuzhi’s voice pulled him from his thoughts.

Jiang Wu continued, “Yes, like the ones at Qiu Wuchen’s house, many flags, though they’re not exactly the same. I’m not sure if they were spirit-summoning flags.”

“Anyway, after that, I was somehow pulled into this world and became your emperor,” Jiang Wu said. “Look, your emperor was diligent, loved his people, and was respected. But me, I’m lazy, shameless, and completely worthless. We’re worlds apart. How could I possibly be your emperor?”

Yin Wuzhi placed his hand on Jiang Wu’s head, his fingertips brushing through his soft black hair. “You’re just overwhelmed. You can’t accept it.”

“Yin Wuzhi,” Jiang Wu said, “I know very well who I am. I also know that you don’t love me; you love your emperor.”

“You are my emperor.”

Jiang Wu knew Yin Wuzhi wouldn’t believe him. “Maybe when I die, he will return.”

“You’ve already tarnished his reputation. How would he live with that if he returned?”

“Then he should die too,” Jiang Wu said without remorse. “I don’t think he was ever happy. Dying would be better than living.”

Yin Wuzhi lowered his head and rested his forehead against Jiang Wu’s, suppressing his emotions. “That day, I was wrong. I shouldn’t have been so rough with you. I don’t know what came over me…”

That day, he had truly lost control.

Jiang Wu’s words had been sharp, each one like a knife cutting into him. When he woke up and couldn’t find Jiang Wu, Yin Wuzhi could still recall how he felt. His mind went blank, and every hair on his body seemed to stand on end.

He didn’t understand why he felt that way.

A wave of immense pain gripped his heart, making him feel as though he would explode.

That feeling was all too familiar—fear, anger, helplessness, like a dark tide swallowing him whole.

He called Jiang Wu’s name, but all he saw was darkness, unable to see his own hand in front of him.

Fortunately, the sound of rocks knocking together brought him back to his senses, allowing him to regain his calm and return to Jiang Wu.

That day, he had suffered severe injuries, but despite that, he still did what he did to Jiang Wu.

He knew he was wrong, that in such a state he could have hurt Jiang Wu. But he couldn’t control himself.

He didn’t know why—he just desperately wanted to possess Jiang Wu, as if that was the only way to feel at peace.

Later, Jiang Wu passed out, and in fact, so did he.

He forced his body to carry Jiang Wu into the water to clean him, then carefully wrapped him in clothes and placed him back on the stone bed, pretending as if nothing had happened.

Yin Wuzhi buried his face in Jiang Wu’s neck. Jiang Wu didn’t know why he suddenly brought this up but still said, “I forgive you.”

That day had been difficult, but it hadn’t been unbearable. In fact, there were a few moments where Jiang Wu had even felt a bit of pleasure. It’s just that the discomfort far outweighed the pleasure, and he didn’t want to experience it again.

Yin Wuzhi’s mouth tightened.

So, hurting him didn’t matter—Jiang Wu didn’t hold a grudge. In Jiang Wu’s heart, Yin Wuzhi’s love and hate were both insignificant.

“Your Majesty, could you, just a little, keep me in your heart?” Yin Wuzhi asked. “Even just a little would be enough.”

“You still don’t understand. I’m not your emperor.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Yin Wuzhi said, “You, the person speaking with me right now—could you keep me in your heart, even just a little?”

He lifted his head from Jiang Wu’s neck, his voice hoarse as he asked, “Please?”

“You still don’t believe me.”

Yin Wuzhi couldn’t bring himself to believe it.

A soul without origin or destination, perhaps a spirit born from the heavens and earth. Jiang Wu’s description left him unsettled. He knew very well that such a being wouldn’t care about him. To a spirit like that, he was as insignificant as a grain of sand in a river. How could he ever win its favor?

“I don’t believe it,” Yin Wuzhi admitted.

Jiang Wu sighed.

He had known from the start that telling Yin Wuzhi would be a waste of words, but before he died, he had wanted to share this truth.

Whether or not Yin Wuzhi believed him was his concern. 

Jiang Wu dropped the topic and closed his eyes again.

The bandaged hand moved to his ear. Jiang Wu said, “Don’t move.”

Yin Wuzhi kissed his lips.

Jiang Wu said, “Don’t…”

Yin Wuzhi pressed harder, kissing him deeply and sucking his lips. “I love you. I want to be with you forever, never parting.”

“There is no such thing as forever.”

“Then, as long as I’m alive, for every moment that I am conscious, I will never leave you.”

Jiang Wu: “…”

Childish fool.

He closed his eyes and said, “I’m going to sleep now.”

Before leaving, he wanted a good rest.

But he didn’t get that rest. Minister Chen and Grand Preceptor Wen were quickly summoned, and the Great Empress Dowager personally welcomed them inside, ordering Yin Wuzhi to wake him up.

When Jiang Wu woke up, he felt a bit cold and shivered involuntarily. Yin Wuzhi immediately wrapped him in a cloak and placed him back in the wheelchair before pushing him out.

Minister Chen and Grand Preceptor Wen both greeted him with a bow.

Yao Ji, still unaware of what had happened, was beginning to feel drowsy herself.

Grand Preceptor Wen spoke first, “We’re unsure why the Great Empress Dowager summoned the two of us from so far away. What pressing matter requires our attention?”

“It’s not particularly urgent,” the Great Empress Dowager  replied. “I just heard something quite interesting.” She glanced at Jiang Wu, initially wanting him to explain, but recalling his startling statement earlier, “I am the son of King Wen of Zhao,” she turned to Yin Wuzhi instead. “Yin Shu, tell everyone what the emperor said.”

Yin Wuzhi replied, “The emperor said that his biological father is someone else, not the late emperor.”

He deliberately left out Jiang Wu’s mention of King Wen of Zhao, knowing that if the conversation shifted toward the Zhao Kingdom, Yao Ji would become extremely anxious. By first revealing the part about the late emperor not being his biological father, Yao Ji would naturally start searching for ways to disprove it.

As expected, no sooner had he spoken than Yao Ji furiously shouted, “Absurd!”

She stood up abruptly. “Yin Wuzhi, I see you’ve grown tired of living! How dare you slander the Son of Heaven like this!”

“Dear grandson,” the Great Empress Dowager  interjected, “please tell everyone again who told you this.” She added a reminder to prevent Jiang Wu from speaking out of turn, “Just say who told you.”

Jiang Wu, eager to speak as little as possible, answered, “It was Mother who told me.”

Yin Wuzhi stepped back behind Jiang Wu. Upon hearing him speak, Yao Ji’s face paled, and she grew visibly distressed. She rushed over to Jiang Wu and said, “Wu Er, what nonsense are you saying? When did Mother ever tell you such a thing?”

“On the day before I fell off the cliff, Mother told me,” Jiang Wu said. “Mother also said that I am the son of Zhao—”

Before Yin Wuzhi could stop Jiang Wu from finishing his sentence, Yao Ji screamed, “You shut your mouth!”

Indeed, she feared Jiang Wu mentioning his so-called biological father more than anything. The others were watching to see how she would refute the claim, but Yao Ji had her own reasons for not wanting it spoken aloud due to the significant interests involved.

Jiang Wu’s ears buzzed from the shouting.

Yin Wuzhi bent down to rub his ear, while Yao Ji, breathless, suddenly knelt before the Great Empress Dowager. “Royal Mother, please see clearly—Wu Er’s mind is not well. He often speaks nonsense. Didn’t you personally bring him to the temple to pray for him? Royal Mother, you must not believe anything he says! He is the late emperor’s son. Look at his nose—it’s exactly like the late emperor’s!”

Jiang Wu realized something was wrong. “Mother said my biological father—”

“I never said that!” Yao Ji screamed, completely losing control. “I never said that!”

“Mother did say it,” Jiang Wu insisted. In moments of desperation, he displayed an unstoppable willpower, though his voice was still a bit weak. “Mother also said that if this were to be revealed, I would be cursed by everyone, hated by Grandmother, and unloved by Empress Dowager Wen. The people and officials would all be utterly disappointed in me… cough.”

Yin Wuzhi gently patted his back.

On the side, Grand Preceptor Wen, Minister Chen, Marquis Zuowu, and King Dingnan all looked at him with admiration and respect.

Minister Chen commented, “According to the emperor’s words, this is knowingly walking into the tiger’s den.”

King Dingnan added, “Such courage.”

Marquis Zuowu sighed, “Whether it’s being hated by the Great Empress Dowager or unloved by Empress Dowager Wen, or being cursed and hated by everyone—each of these consequences would be enough to weigh heavily on one’s mind. If we were in such a situation, we’d surely want to keep it hidden.”

King Dingnan nodded. “Steadfast determination.”

Grand Preceptor Wen stroked his beard. “Yet our emperor, even without knowing whether it’s true or not, still bravely and openly shared everything, ready to face the consequences. Such purity of heart makes us feel deeply ashamed.”

King Dingnan agreed, “Ashamed indeed.”

The Great Empress Dowager , pleased with what she heard, turned to Yao Ji and asked, “So, is the emperor truly the son of the late emperor, Yao Ji? What do you say?”

“Of course he is,” Yao Ji’s voice cracked as she spoke. “Just as these ministers have said, if he weren’t the son of the late emperor, how could he have such ability and resolve? Look at his face. How does he not resemble the late emperor? His skin, his hair—they’re the same color as the late emperor’s!”

King Dingnan remarked, “Yes, the late emperor also had fair skin and black hair.”

Clinging to this lifeline, Yao Ji nodded frantically. “Exactly! Measure his nose—it’s as high as the late emperor’s. His posture, Wu Er, stand up and walk a few steps. The way you walk, it’s just like the late emperor!”

Jiang Wu: “…”

Stupid woman, only a fool would listen to you.