Chapter 75
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Stay with the green lanterns and ancient Buddha, never to return to the palace
Never return to the palace.
The Empress Dowager’s eyelids twitched. The joy she had felt on her way here was now replaced by deep sorrow. But during the ten years Emperor Hongxing had avoided her, she had shed all her tears and could no longer cry.
What did she do wrong?
Her son was bewitched by a wicked woman, so completely that he disregarded ethics and propriety. She merely wanted to remove this woman for his sake!
“My son, I did it for your own good.”
The Empress Dowager moved her lips, “Which of my actions was not for your sake? In the end, this is how you repay me.”
Everyone knew that the Empress Dowager had lived in the deep palace for a long time, devoutly worshipping Buddha day and night for over ten years. Yet, they did not know that it was because Emperor Hongxing had distanced himself from her, refusing to see his mother.
But now, Emperor Hongxing not only refused to see her, he even wanted to tear away the last veil of decency, banishing her from the palace forever!
What a life with the ancient Buddhas and green lanterns.
What a life, never to return to the palace.
The Empress Dowager trembled with rage, gritting her teeth, “My son, you have such a cruel heart.”
“For my own good…”
Emperor Hongxing raised his head, his eyes bloodshot, “Mother, don’t you know—Qingmei, she is my life! For her, I am willing to defy the world. What does it matter that she is a Jiang family daughter? What does it matter that she was married? I don’t care! I only want her!”
“You know, you know everything,” Emperor Hongxing said, “but what did you do?”
“You gave her a dagger, and then set fire to the Chunshen Hall!”
Emperor Hongxing laughed bitterly, “She wanted to die. Mother, even if you had let her go, never to be found again in this lifetime, I wouldn’t hate you this much. You claim you did it for me, but she wanted to die, you gave her the dagger, she died, and you withheld her corpse. Mother—were you really doing it for me?”
Emperor Hongxing’s voice was filled with tears, and the Empress Dowager almost lost her balance. The chief palace maid rushed forward to support her, but the Empress Dowager pushed her away, “You blame me?”
“She entered the palace as an orphan with a low status, yet you insisted on burying her in the imperial mausoleum with the honors of an empress. Do you know what the court officials said about you? Do you know how the historians recorded it?”
The Empress Dowager said sorrowfully, “My son, I carried you for ten months and gave birth to you. How could I bear to see you condemned by future generations? Moreover…”
“Her child was filled with ominous energy. The master said the only way to resolve it was this method. He had already caused the death of Beauty Yu, and you would have been next. How could I stand by and do nothing?”
“For me, it’s always for me.”
Emperor Hongxing closed his eyes, “Mother, just because I didn’t mention it doesn’t mean I don’t know. You claimed Fangli was born under an ill star, doomed to bring misfortune to his parents. But the master at Zhao An Temple said—it was you who told him so!”
“From beginning to end, it was never for me,” Emperor Hongxing said, “Mother, it was for yourself, only for yourself!”
He knew.
He actually knew.
The Empress Dowager was stunned and staggered a few steps. She refused the help of the chief palace maid and had to support herself against the wall to barely stand. The Empress Dowager said with difficulty, “My son…”
After telling lies a thousand times, even she had come to believe them.
Yes, her initial intention was only to vent her anger.
She hated Jiang Qingmei.
It had nothing to do with her background or how absurd it was for her to enter the palace. It was just that after she entered the palace, her son no longer listened to her advice.
It was as if he was bewitched, solely focused on pleasing this woman. In his eyes, there was no empire, no people, and not even her, his mother!
How could she not hate that?
She hated it to death.
Her son, whom she had given birth to and raised. During the years when the late emperor was alive, she had schemed bitterly for him, paving the way step by step, finally allowing him to ascend to the highest position. Yet, his heart and eyes were filled only with that woman!
She wished that woman would die; she wished she could tear that woman into pieces!
But even after that woman died, her ghost lingered, giving her no peace, causing her and Emperor Hongxing to become completely estranged, never to meet again!
The Empress Dowager’s breathing was rapid. Being mercilessly exposed, she felt as if she had been slapped hard in the face, feeling extremely humiliated.
After a long daze, the Empress Dowager slowly spoke again, “My son, have you thought this through?”
“If you insist on sending me to Zhao An Temple, never to return to the palace—then you need not recognize me as your mother anymore. I will consider that I never had a son like you!”
Emperor Hongxing looked at her, his lips trembling uncontrollably, unable to utter a word for a long time.
Many things he knew well but never mentioned, out of respect for the bond between mother and son. But his indecisiveness had allowed too many things to happen.
Emperor Hongxing remained silent for a long time. In the stillness, the Empress Dowager’s heart held a glimmer of hope.
But in the next second, her heart sank to the bottom.
“Alright.”
Emperor Hongxing lifted his robe and slowly knelt on the ground. With a “bang,” he kowtowed to the Empress Dowager, “This one is to repay the grace of your raising me.”
With another “bang,” Emperor Hongxing kowtowed a second time, “This one is to repay the ten years during which I ignored you.”
Before the third kowtow, the Empress Dowager had already turned and left, but Emperor Hongxing still calmly kowtowed.
“This one, from now on, severs all ties between us. Mother, you… take care of yourself.”
The Empress Dowager paused, something dripping down. She reached out and found it was tears.
She had thought that over the past ten years, she had cried all her tears and could no longer cry. It turned out that tears were inexhaustible; they just hadn’t reached the depths of sorrow.
The Empress Dowager dazedly wiped away her tears and walked forward without looking back. But after only a few steps, she blacked out and fainted to the ground.
“Empress Dowager!”
“Empress Dowager—!”
The chief palace maid hurriedly pushed her, crying out, “Doctor! The Empress Dowager has fainted, quickly summon the doctor—!”
Emperor Hongxing’s steps moved, but he didn’t go over. He merely asked tiredly, “Now… are you satisfied?”
The screen was removed, revealing Xue Fangli and Jiang Juan behind it. Xue Fangli lazily asked Jiang Juan, “Feeling better?”
Xue Fangli’s request was for Emperor Hongxing to punish Imperial Consort Mei and the Empress Dowager.
Jiang Juan wasn’t really angry in the first place. He had choked the Empress Dowager a few times, and she didn’t manage to slap him. But His Highness was well-intentioned, so Jiang Juan nodded, “Yes, I feel better.”
Xue Fangli then replied, “Since he feels better, I’m satisfied.”
Emperor Hongxing, however, did not stop there. He asked Xue Fangli, “What about you?”
“Me?”
Xue Fangli smiled, “Father, it has been ten years. It’s too late.”
Emperor Hongxing was stunned.
He understood what Xue Fangli meant. Ten years ago, after those fourteen days, if he had immediately ordered the Empress Dowager to be sent to Zhao An Temple, never to enter the palace in this lifetime, Xue Fangli might have been satisfied.
But a whole ten years had passed. He merely avoided seeing the Empress Dowager, seemingly unsure of what to do. But in reality, he was protecting her in another way.
Too late.
Really too late.
Emperor Hongxing’s eyes dimmed, “I understand.”
Xue Fangli ignored it, “Father, if there is nothing else, I will take my leave.”
Emperor Hongxing gave a bitter smile and waved his hand, “Go.”
“Rest well these few days. If nothing unexpected happens, on the day of the ancestor worship, after the ceremony, I will issue the decree to appoint the crown prince.”
Xue Fangli nodded and walked out with Jiang Juan. Jiang Juan couldn’t help but look back. Emperor Hongxing was being helped onto the dragon bed, and he seemed to have aged significantly in an instant, his entire demeanor filled with decay.
“What’s wrong?”
Xue Fangli asked when he noticed Jiang Juan looking for too long. Jiang Juan hesitated, shaking his head. He didn’t want to say anything, but Xue Fangli pressed on, “Do you think he’s pitiful? That I’m too harsh and should forgive him?”
“No,” Jiang Juan hurriedly explained. “Pitiful people must have something detestable about them. It was His Majesty who was wrong. If Your Highness doesn’t want to forgive him, no one can make you forgive.”
Xue Fangli said, “You can.”
Jiang Juan was stunned, “What?”
Xue Fangli slowly said, “If you can’t bear it and want me to forgive him, I can forgive him. So—do you want me to forgive him?”
“I’ll listen to you.”
Jiang Juan asked, “You’ll listen to whatever I say?”
Xue Fangli seemed indifferent, even with a hint of a smile in his voice, “I’m henpecked. Naturally, whatever you say, I’ll listen.”
Jiang Juan, hearing this, deliberately said, “Alright then, forgive His Majesty.”
Xue Fangli nodded, paused in his steps, and seemed ready to say something to Emperor Hongxing. But as soon as he opened his mouth, Jiang Juan hurriedly grabbed his hand, “Your Highness, don’t.”
Xue Fangli turned his head, “Hmm?”
Jiang Juan looked at him, unsure how to express his feelings. Emperor Hongxing seemed pitiful, but he was also the root of all the problems and the source of Xue Fangli’s misfortune. Yet, if Jiang Juan asked for forgiveness, Xue Fangli seemed genuinely willing to let go of all the hatred.
Even if Xue Fangli himself didn’t want to forgive, even if he still harbored resentment.
Seeing him silent, Xue Fangli asked again, “What’s wrong?”
Jiang Juan complained softly, “Why must I decide your matters for you? What I say might not always be right. If you want to forgive, then forgive. If you don’t want to, then don’t…”
“Whatever you say is right.”
Xue Fangli interrupted calmly, “If you think he’s pitiful and keep thinking about it, unable to sleep at night, then I would have to comfort you.”
“Too troublesome. It’s better to settle it once and for all,” Xue Fangli commented flatly.
Jiang Juan stared at him blankly and after a long time said in a muffled voice, “He is pitiful, but… no forgiveness. Your Highness, you don’t want to forgive, and I won’t let you forgive. I was lying just now.”
Xue Fangli wasn’t surprised, “Little liar.”
Jiang Juan pretended not to hear and started a new complaint, “I don’t always make you comfort me.”
Xue Fangli sneered, “Really.”
Jiang Juan: “…”
The warmth disappeared, completely gone.
He lowered his head in frustration, deciding not to pay any more attention to Xue Fangli. However, before they had walked far, the Empress Dowager woke up. She immediately saw Xue Fangli and called out to him in a weary voice, “Xue Fangli.”
Xue Fangli ignored her, but Jiang Juan stopped and instinctively looked over. Xue Fangli said calmly, “Keep walking, don’t mind her.”
Without giving her a glance, Xue Fangli continued, but the Empress Dowager didn’t care. She slowly said, “You’ve done so many heartless things and killed so many people. One day, you’ll face retribution!”
“I know you don’t believe in karma or retribution, but it doesn’t matter. I’m telling you, it’s not that there is no retribution; it’s just that the time hasn’t come.”
“Empress Dowager…”
Jiang Juan couldn’t bear it anymore, but just as he opened his mouth, Xue Fangli picked him up. Jiang Juan was startled and quickly clung to him, “Your Highness.”
Xue Fangli didn’t give him a chance to speak and carried him out of Yangxin Hall. Jiang Juan became more frustrated and lightly bumped his head against Xue Fangli several times, asking, “I wasn’t finished talking.”
“Why bother with her?”
Palace lamps lit the way, illuminating the night as if it were day. Xue Fangli’s tone was calm, “She’s at the end of her rope, only capable of cursing. If you engage with her, I’m afraid you’ll get thirsty.”
Jiang Juan stopped bumping into him, but he was still unhappy. “But why? You haven’t done anything wrong, yet she accuses you of heinous crimes and predicts retribution.”
Xue Fangli lowered his gaze. “What if I really have done something?”
Without hesitation, Jiang Juan replied, “Impossible. You’re so good, there’s no way you’ve done anything heinous. She’s just making things up.”
After a moment, Jiang Juan added, “Besides, I’m with you every day. I know what kind of person you are better than she does.”
The palace lamps swayed, casting light on Jiang Juan’s clear and pure face, his eyes untainted by any impurities.
Xue Fangli looked at him, his expression darkening. “You spend every day with me, but you’re so easily fooled and so naive. If I wanted to hide something from you, how would you ever find out?”
Jiang Juan: “………”
Why was His Highness like this?
He was trying to comfort him, yet he was called naive in return.
Jiang Juan grew even more displeased. “You’re the naive one. You’re the most naive.”
Xue Fangli responded, “You’re not naive? Then tell me, why did I agree to become the Crown Prince?”
Jiang Juan had an inkling of the answer but wasn’t entirely sure. Fearing it was wishful thinking, he hesitated and then shook his head. “Why?”
“Because of you.”
Xue Fangli’s words were deliberate. “You are always afraid. I don’t know what exactly you’re afraid of or what there is to fear. But since you’re afraid, it means you think I can’t protect you. So I had to give you peace of mind.”
“You didn’t know that, and you still say you’re not naive?”
Jiang Juan’s eyelashes fluttered. “I…”
He should have retorted, he should have said he knew, but he couldn’t say anything. Slowly furrowing his brow, he looked up at Xue Fangli for a long time before murmuring, “Your Highness, why are you so good to me?”
Xue Fangli’s smile was casual. “Do you need to ask me that?”
Jiang Juan didn’t speak. He shook his head, then nodded, feeling very confused. He simply looked quietly at Xue Fangli.
The innocence on the boy’s face made Xue Fangli feel a mix of emotions. He pinched the soft flesh on Jiang Juan’s face. “I kiss you, I bite you, I want to eat you every day, and you still ask why I’m so good to you?”
“What other reason could there be?”
Xue Fangli’s tone was harsh. “It’s because… I like you.”
“I didn’t say it because I was afraid of scaring you. I wanted to take it slow. But we’ve come this far, and you still ask why I’m good to you.”
Xue Fangli’s eyes darkened. “And you? Why did you let me kiss you?”
The question was too direct, making Jiang Juan’s heart skip a beat. His gaze wandered, “It was you who wanted to kiss me. I just… forgot to push you away.”
Xue Fangli looked at him without expression for a long time before sneering. “Forgot to push me away.”
Xue Fangli stopped speaking, placing Jiang Juan down. Before Jiang Juan could ask, he was suddenly pulled back, his back hitting a rockery. Xue Fangli leaned down and kissed him without hesitation.
This kiss was different from the previous one. It wasn’t gentle or tentative.
Jiang Juan’s near-blind trust had once comforted and pleased him, but at this moment, it only filled Xue Fangli with fear and an endless sense of agitation.
—He wasn’t truly a good person, and he wasn’t sure if the young man would accept the real him.
He kissed with force, almost aggressively, prying open Jiang Juan’s lips and invading his mouth, gripping his waist tightly.
“Y-Your Highness…”
Jiang Juan felt pain and couldn’t breathe. He didn’t like this kind of kiss but sensed His Highness was upset. In the end, he did nothing but obediently let him kiss.
It hurt too much. His lips were bitten several times, and even his tongue was forcefully held. Jiang Juan tried to endure the pain but couldn’t hold back his tears.
The tears wet his eyelashes and silently fell. He was kissed until he looked pitiful, his eyes and nose red. But he never showed any resistance.
This wetness finally caught Xue Fangli’s attention. He paused and let go of Jiang Juan. However, he didn’t comfort him as he usually would. Instead, he asked coldly, “Why didn’t you push me away?”
“If you’re too weak to push me away, you could have bitten me.”
Xue Fangli questioned, “Were you so weak you couldn’t bite me either?”
“Or did you… forget again?”
“No.”
Jiang Juan shook his head, mustering his courage. “Your Highness, I… didn’t want to push you away.”
He thought Xue Fangli was upset because he was being stubborn. Jiang Juan tried to soothe him. “Your Highness, don’t be angry.”
“Last time, I didn’t forget to push you away either. I wanted you to kiss me.”
“Really?”
Xue Fangli lowered his gaze, seemingly listening but also dismissive.
Seeing him like this, Jiang Juan licked his reddened lips. To prove he really wanted the kiss, he shyly wrapped his arms around Xue Fangli’s neck and awkwardly initiated a kiss.
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