After Exile, I Married the Amnesiac General [Rebirth] Chapter 73

When this thought crossed his mind, Pei Zhen’s heartbeat seemed to skip faster, and his body lying flat stiffened like a sword.

It wasn’t that he was lusting after beauty or coveting the wife beside him, but rather that when he had amnesia, he would certainly have shared the bed with her. Now, if he suddenly acted distant and cold, would it reveal something unusual?

Besides, she was his wife. For husband and wife to consummate their relationship was only proper.

They had already been married for a month. What should have been done must have already been done, although he didn’t remember the specifics of their wedding night, he did remember that night in the mountain stronghold, when he had been drugged and had grabbed his wife’s hand to hold himself. Those hands were slender and beautiful, tightly grasped by him, like a pitiful small animal forced to get close to a ferocious beast. By the end, every pale finger had been stained with his…

Pei Zhen’s breathing stalled. He suddenly shut his eyes tightly, only feeling that the heated kang was unbearably hot.

He forced himself to shift his thoughts and stop thinking about those images… but what had been done had been done. If he used amnesia as an excuse to pretend not to know, or act as if it hadn’t happened, wouldn’t that be too heartless and unfeeling? Where would his sense of responsibility and conscience be?

No matter what, since he had married her, he should take responsibility.

Thinking this, he let out a light breath, as if making up his mind. But when he opened his eyes and looked to the side, he froze again.

Was his wife already asleep? If she was, then he…

But if she wasn’t, and was also waiting… women were generally more reserved; in such matters, it wouldn’t be appropriate for her to take the initiative. He should be the one to do so.

He took a deep breath and extended a hand out from under the quilt, but after pausing stiffly for a moment, suddenly withdrew it again.

Would this be too abrupt?

Pei Zhen turned over and lay back, but after a short while, he turned back again.

She was his wife, how could it be abrupt?

But he really couldn’t recall how things had been done on their wedding night… It wasn’t that he didn’t know how, but…

He turned his head to look at the wife lying beside him in the darkness. For some reason, there was a strange tension in his heart.

Why was it like this? She was his wife. They had been married for a month. Why did he… still feel like a green youth entering the bridal chamber for the first time?

Pei Zhen was unwilling to admit it, but besides nervousness, he also felt a trace of uncertainty, like the Pei Er who was still suffering from amnesia.

This really shouldn’t be the case. This wasn’t his nature. He should be decisive and efficient, composed and resolute. Once he decided something, he should act on it, not be like this now…

He turned over again, only feeling that the heated kang was unbearably hot, baking his body as if it were on fire, and making his heart increasingly restless.

…

Past the third watch of the night, the wooden clapper outside sounded three times.

Li Chanxiu woke from a hazy dream. Perhaps because he hadn’t drunk much water during the day, his throat felt a little dry. But thinking that getting out of bed to drink water would mean exposing himself to the cold air, and with his cold poison about to flare up again, making him especially sensitive to cold lately, he was truly unwilling to leave the warmth of the covers.

Torn like this, he turned over, endured for a moment, then couldn’t help turning over again.

Beside him, Pei Zhen, who had already turned over who knew how many times while he slept, stiffened, and quickly realized something, his wife wasn’t asleep either, his wife was also… waiting.

“Shen…” In the darkness, he suddenly spoke, choosing his words carefully.

As soon as he spoke, he realized his voice was terribly dry and hoarse.

And he suddenly discovered he didn’t know how to address his wife. Calling her “Lady Shen” felt too distant; calling her “Ah Xiu,” he had never done so before, and his wife wasn’t even Shen Xiu, this might not even be her real name.

He did remember that during his amnesia, he had called her “Miss Shen,” though he didn’t know what kind of fancy that was. Forget it, better to call her, 

“Wife?” he said hoarsely. That form of address couldn’t be wrong.

In the darkness, Li Chanxiu clearly stiffened. After a long moment, he responded with a soft “Mm,” carrying a hint of nasal tone and confusion, not understanding why Pei Er would suddenly call him “wife” in the middle of the night.

Clearly, they were at home, with no outsiders present, especially… they were in bed. It felt a bit strange.

He quietly waited for what came next, wanting to know what the other intended to say.

Beside him, Pei Er seemed to let out a light breath, as if confirming something.

Just as Li Chanxiu was puzzled, he suddenly felt a weight press down on him, followed by a wave of warmth.

Pei Zhen, along with the quilt, covered him over, a strange yet familiar scorching presence invading him, completely enveloping him from above.

Li Chanxiu froze completely. Before he could react, he felt the other lower his head slightly, thin lips landing on his brow and the tip of his nose, brushing lightly like feathers, bringing a faint ticklish, tingling sensation. The breath was scorching yet clear.

Beneath the quilt, a hand suddenly settled at his waist, broad and strong, roaming inch by inch. The burning warmth of that palm made his already sensitive waist tremble and go weak uncontrollably. Shock surged through him, and for a moment he forgot to react.

The feather-like touches on his face moved slowly downward, and as if sensing his trembling, a hoarse voice softly coaxed, “Don’t be afraid.”

As he spoke, the deft fingers at his waist had already reached his sash. Like a bird caught in a hunter’s net, Li Chanxiu trembled, feathers quivering, yet unable to stop the hunter’s hand from approaching.

Just as the sash was about to be undone, and those fingertips were about to touch his skin, he finally came fully to his senses. Suddenly, he shoved the other away forcefully, wrapped himself tightly in the quilt, and shrank to the corner by the wall, his voice alarmed: “You, you, what are you doing?”

Pei Zhen, suddenly pushed away, was momentarily stunned. After a long pause, he said hoarsely, “Naturally… to carry out the rites between husband and wife.”

Then, puzzled, he added, “What’s wrong with you?”

Why was his wife reacting so strongly? Had he done something inappropriate just now?

Hearing the words “rites between husband and wife,” Li Chanxiu’s mind went blank. After a long moment, he said in disbelief, “You, you, what are you saying? We…”

Suddenly, it was as if a flash of white light pierced his mind. He remembered something and stammered, “You, you don’t mean… you don’t remember that our marriage is fake, do you?”

Pei Zhen froze upon hearing this. After a long while, he repeated, “Fake marriage?”

A dull pain suddenly throbbed in his head. He quickly raised a hand to press his temple, cold sweat breaking out on his forehead, yet no images surfaced in his mind. Deep down, he even seemed to strongly resist those words.

Impossible, how could that be? If it were a fake marriage, how could he have memories of waking in the morning, holding his wife contentedly in his arms? And not just one morning.

If it were a fake marriage, how could he remember waking the morning after their wedding, tying his hair together with his wife’s, cutting it, and keeping it? How could he remember drinking the nuptial wine together on their wedding night?

If it were a fake marriage, how could he remember kissing his wife in the morning? How could he remember, after drinking deer blood wine, nearly losing control and kissing her beside the beacon tower?

If those weren’t enough to refute it, then on that night in the mountain stronghold when they fell off the cliff, having already gone that far, how could they not be a real couple?

Even if they weren’t truly husband and wife, after going that far, he should have married her and taken responsibility.

The more Pei Zhen thought, the worse his headache became, and the less willing he was to believe it.

How could it possibly be fake? If it really were, then even if he couldn’t remember it, his subconscious should still retain something. He shouldn’t feel such resistance and disbelief.

Even when she mentioned it, he should at least recall some vague memory, like before, when he didn’t remember having beaten Yang Yuanyi, but after being reminded, he recalled it; or like the wedding night, although he still couldn’t remember the specifics of the bridal chamber, he at least remembered drinking the nuptial wine beforehand, embracing closely afterward, and tying their hair together the next day.

Especially since deep down, he didn’t feel that they hadn’t consummated the marriage. But the idea of a fake marriage, he instinctively resisted it, not believing it to be true.

Then why would his wife say it was fake? To avoid sharing a bed with him?

Pei Zhen felt his head ache even more… Right, he had suffered a head injury and couldn’t remember what happened during his amnesia. His wife knew this too. Could it be that she was deliberately deceiving him?

That wasn’t impossible. When he had amnesia, she often coaxed him like this, tricking him with licorice slices, telling him the arrow poison hadn’t healed yet, persuading him to let Lu Zhi go, and later at the tavern coaxing him to leave so she could speak with Lu Zhi alone…

By the dim light, Li Chanxiu saw his vague figure clutching his head in pain. Forgetting his shock, he hurriedly got out of bed, lit the lamp, and asked urgently, “How are you?”

Pei Zhen raised his head. In the dim yellow glow, the figure before him held a small oil lamp, her black hair loose behind her. Her fair, delicate face looked even smaller in the light, her ink-like eyes softened by the glow, her expression unable to hide her concern as she looked at him gently.

She was worried about him.

How could she not be his wife?

His pair of black eyes were deep, his throat unconsciously rolling.

“Don’t lie to me.” He stared fixedly at the other, speaking hoarsely.

Li Chanxiu was stunned for a moment, meeting his blazing gaze.

“I remember we got married, drank the nuptial wine, and at night tightly embraced together under the tattered quilt. I remember we tied our hair, the light kiss in the morning, and that night we drank deer blood wine, as well as that night in the mountain stronghold…”

Li Chanxiu’s eyes widened in shock. It took him a long while to react; even the hand holding the oil lamp shook. He instinctively said, “No, did you remember wrong? Those all had reasons, we…”

He wanted to refute, but couldn’t explain how, that night in the stronghold, he ended up helping Pei Er. And that night they drank deer blood wine, why his mind had gone fuzzy, almost leading to a kiss.

He shook his head hard, then quickly thought of something and hurriedly said, “Right, that’s it, the night of the wedding, I told you clearly it was a fake marriage, and you agreed at the time…”

Pei Zhen frowned. “If so, why did we still… consummate the marriage that night?”

Li Chanxiu stared in shock. “We did not consummate it.”

Pei Zhen: “…But I remember we slept together.”

Li Chanxiu: “Th-that was because it was too cold.”

Pei Zhen frowned. “Then the mountain stronghold…”

“You were drugged at the time.” Li Chanxiu said decisively.

Pei Zhen: “…But if we weren’t husband and wife, even if I was drugged, I shouldn’t have been like that. There would always have been other ways to resolve it.”

Li Chanxiu was dumbfounded.

“And… after it was already like that, shouldn’t I take responsibility? Even if not husband and wife, if something like that happened, I should take responsibility and marry you.”

Li Chanxiu: “…”

“Right,” Pei Zhen suddenly got off the bed, went to the chest where clothes were kept and rummaged through it. Soon he found a sachet and handed it to him to look at. “The hair-binding sachet.”

Li Chanxiu stiffly took it. After setting down the oil lamp, he opened it. Inside were indeed two strands of hair tied together.

When was this… cut? His mind went blank.

“Cut the morning after the wedding.” Pei Zhen looked at him and said hoarsely.

After speaking, he suddenly leaned down, his cool, clear aura approaching. Li Chanxiu’s eyelashes trembled lightly, and he instinctively dodged to the side. The next moment, a strand of his black hair was lifted.

Seeing him avoid, Pei Zhen’s gaze paused, somewhat dark, then he handed the lifted strand of black hair in front of him and said hoarsely, “Look, this is the section that was cut.”

He even remembered the exact place.

Then he also found, in his own hair, the strand missing a section.

Li Chanxiu looked at the two strands of black hair, then at the sachet in his hand, remaining utterly bewildered.

Seeing this, Pei Zhen sighed softly. “How about I go back to the military camp to sleep tonight.”

He must have done something wrong, for his wife to deceive him with something like a fake marriage and refuse to share a bed with him. But what exactly had he done wrong? After regaining his memory, had he forgotten how affectionate they had been before?

In that case, it was indeed possible.