Saturday night, at Little Fatty’s barbecue stall.
“Pssst—”
The pull tab of the soda can was popped open. The ice-cold cola, frosted with a thin layer of mist, was poured into a disposable plastic cup. On the iron grill, squid tentacles were sizzling with oil; Little Fatty sprinkled a layer of cumin powder with practiced ease, and the fragrance of grilled squid rushed out immediately.
At the next table, a few loud uncles were clinking glasses and chatting while feeding bites of lamb skewers to their kids. Even their big bellies somehow looked pleasing.
“Ai, so annoying. The internship unit I found is way too far from school. Looks like next month I’ll have to rent a place out there,” Little Fatty took a swig of cola and began complaining, “The monthly internship salary is only fifteen hundred, doesn’t include food or housing… What am I even doing this for.”
“For the fact that after you graduate, you can become permanent staff with social insurance, housing fund, and an 8,000 monthly salary.” Brother Shu said.
Little Fatty sighed, “Okay, that… kind of doesn’t sound so bad.”
Ye Ran smiled, “What about you, Brother Shu, are you moving out next month too?”
“Beijing rent is too expensive. The publishing house is only a bit over two kilometers from campus. I’ll just ride a shared bike,” Brother Shu pushed up his glasses. “My internship salary is two thousand a month, and there might be overtime. But this publishing house is well-known. No way I’m giving it up.”
He seemed to think of something and looked at Ye Ran: “What about you and Shen Shi?”
“I’m taking commercial art commissions online now, so that counts as an internship too.”
Ye Ran had a quiet personality and found it hard to deal with people. Big companies have many artists and high competition pressure; small companies don’t pay at first and only pay per piece, none of that suited him.
As for Shen Shi—
Shen Shi was grilling squid tentacles. When they were perfectly seared on the outside and tender inside, he sprinkled cumin and seasoning powder and placed them onto Ye Ran’s plate. “I joined the company too. My actual salary is eight thousand a month.”
Young Master Shen might be seeing such a small amount of money for the first time in his life.
Ye Ran held back a laugh.
But Little Fatty and Brother Shu howled together, slapping the table in outrage: “What??? You’ve only interned for one month and you’re making eight thousand? What’s that supposed to mean? Can people still be friends in this day and age?”
Back in their sophomore year, Father Shen had begun shifting the company’s focus from Haishi to Beijing. Beijing was closest to national policy changes; Father Shen, a businessman with great foresight, knew clearly the value of short-term wealth versus long-term influence.
Once the company’s transition was nearly complete, Shen Shi could no longer use “I’m studying in Beijing, it’s too far to commute” as an excuse. Father Shen was always decisive: he shoved him directly into a company project team, making him start from the bottom with the identity of an intern.
To this day, no one in the company knew Shen Shi’s real identity.
Ye Ran found this amusing. This whole “hidden identity” vibe made him secretly imagine all sorts of scenarios.
Every night before bed, he’d ask Shen Shi, “Did anyone throw their weight around at the company today?” “Any office drama?” “Did anyone look down on you because of your lack of seniority and will they be shocked later when they find out your identity?” and so on.
On the surface, Father Shen didn’t show distress for his son, but come weekends he would always find an excuse to ask Ye Ran to bring Shen Shi home for dinner.
Both father and son were stubborn. Ye Ran felt helpless, but didn’t interfere.
After grumbling for a while, two bottles of beer later, Little Fatty and Brother Shu became gloomy again.
“I still remember when we first met. The earliest one to arrive at the dorm… was you, right, Ye Ran? You wore all white back then, looked much more soft and fresh than now, like a little water spirit. I even wondered which rich young master you were, and whether you’d look down on us fatties. But—” Little Fatty chuckled twice. “For four years I’ve been the one taken care of by you the most. Now suddenly having to move out of the dorm… it feels weirdly sad.”
“Same here,” Brother Shu also opened up. “I was the last one to move into our dorm. At that time, only Ye Ran and Shen Shi were there. One was sweeping and the other mopping. I was scared stiff, afraid you two, so clean, would despise me. Who could’ve thought the really messy one in our dorm would be Lin Feipeng.”
Little Fatty was listening happily, but after that line he was immediately offended and amused: “How am I messy?”
Brother Shu: “Tell me yourself, don’t you wash your socks every three days?”
“I changed later!”
“If Shen Shi hadn’t kicked you into the laundry room that time, I bet you’d never have changed in all four years.”
“Hey… hurtful! Please protect my fragile self-esteem—!”
The gloomy atmosphere vanished instantly. Ye Ran unconsciously smiled, slowly finishing his cup of beer.
His alcohol tolerance had improved now. Shen Shi liked collecting alcohol; the wine cabinet at Lakeside Manor was full of fruit wines and red wines. Sometimes when the mood struck, Ye Ran would drink a couple glasses with him.
After one cup, the pumpkin porridge Shen Shi ordered arrived. The boss, wearing a red apron, greeted them warmly: “Pumpkin porridge’s sweetened a bit. We’ve also got some eggplant in the back, want stir-fried eggplant?”
Shen Shi nodded, “And four more bowls of rice.”
“You got it.”
They were all half-grown boys. Barbecue alone couldn’t fill them; they needed rice.
Ye Ran set down the plastic cup and drank two sips of pumpkin porridge. Shen Shi watched him from the side and grilled two more skewers of beef tendon for him. The cube-shaped tendons were chewy, and with cumin and a bit of chili sprinkled on top, incredibly fragrant.
After that, the four of them slowly ate and chatted. A circle of small stir-fry dishes sat around them; by the end, there were only a few scattered skewers and leftover bits of barbecue. Ye Ran felt a bit dizzy, rested awhile, and decided to go to the 24-hour convenience store next door to buy some pure milk.
“I’ll go,” Shen Shi stood up.
Ye Ran: “I can go. You watch those two.”
Whenever Little Fatty and Brother Shu got drunk, they became absurdly strong. Ye Ran absolutely couldn’t restrain them alone but Shen Shi could.
Shen Shi frowned. “It’s fine. They’re just sitting here. What could happen—”
Before he finished, Little Fatty wobbled and rolled right off his chair onto the ground.
Brother Shu exclaimed “Aiyo aiyo” and went to help him up, but stumbled too and nearly stepped on his face.
Shen Shi: “…”
Ye Ran raised a brow, “You go pick them up. I’ll buy the milk. It’s only a few steps. Don’t worry.”
After saying that, Ye Ran rubbed his brow and walked toward the convenience store at the end of the street, eyes clear.
There weren’t many people inside. A few college-aged boys were also buying things.
A chubby boy, flustered and nervous, followed behind a tall boy, asking timidly, “Bro, we’re buying so much stuff because…”
The tall boy picking items looked bored, his tone casual: “Oh, it’s for myself.”
The chubby boy: “…Oh.”
Fang Ziyuan’s heart shattered into two halves. He thought he had finally stepped into Dou Ran’s heart, but turns out he was just deluding himself quq.
He quietly grabbed a bottle of Oriental Leaves tea. While waiting for Dou Ran, he noticed the boy beside him suddenly pause, then lift his eyes with a half-smile, staring toward the cash register.
Those pitch-black eyes visibly lit up, as if the whole person had snapped out of apathy and become spirited.
Fang Ziyuan turned around but, because of his height, he could only see a few rows of shelves.
He looked completely baffled, and just as he was about to walk out, a pile of things was suddenly shoved into his hands. “Do me a favor and put these back.”
Fang Ziyuan: “?”
Not only is he not sharing snacks with me, now he’s cruel enough to make me put them back???
“Shen Shi,” of course, had no idea what he was thinking. With his long legs, he lazily followed the figure walking in front of him.
…
Ye Ran walked out of the convenience store. He didn’t know if it was because it was stuffy inside, but he felt like he couldn’t breathe, and his head grew even more dizzy.
Afraid that Shen Shi would worry if he went alone, he confirmed the direction, quickened his pace, and walked toward the barbecue stall.
But after walking for nearly seven or eight minutes, he still didn’t see the lively stall.
Nor did he smell the aroma of grilled meat.
In front of him was a quiet, long pedestrian crossing. The plane trees lining both sides of the road soared into the sky, their dense leaves swaying in the wind, blocking out the light and rustling loudly.
He was too tired to keep walking. After thinking for a moment, he simply squatted by the roadside, his eyelids drooping in fatigue.
Like a little kid who got lost, afraid to wander any further, quietly waiting for the adult in charge to find him.
A minute later, he heard unhurried footsteps approaching.
He looked over. In the shadow-covered road, a figure slowly stepped into view. One hand in his pocket, a black short-sleeved shirt outlining a lean and upright build, a pair of dark eyes hooked with a faint, careless smile as he raised his eyebrows: “Student Ye Ran—”
Before he could finish, “Shen Shi” suddenly paused, staring at Ye Ran sitting on the curb with open arms, looking at him with big pitiful eyes.
“Shen Shi,” Ye Ran’s tired voice yawned, “why are you so slow? I think I got lost.”
“Shen Shi” suspiciously froze, his body tense for a few seconds. After a moment, he crouched down. Under the glow of the street sign, his features became even clearer.
Ye Ran blinked, looking somewhat unsure. Slowly, he opened his mouth: “Shen Shi?”
The boy in front of him lowered his eyes and nodded. “Mm. I am.”
Ye Ran looked even more confused. His drunken head felt like something was wrong, so he honestly asked, “Why did you get younger?”
…Younger?
“Shen Shi” let out a short laugh, as if he suddenly put down a heavy burden. He crouched in front of him, braced Ye Ran’s knees, and lifted him onto his back, carrying him toward the barbecue stall. “If I don’t get younger, am I supposed to get older?”
“Yes. Because I’ve already gotten older.”
Ye Ran looped his arms around his neck, staring blankly at the side of his face. After a few seconds, he reached out to touch him again, as if checking whether he’d gotten cosmetic surgery.
“Shen Shi” faltered for a step, the corner of his lips curving slightly, lowering his eyes without a word as he felt the warm, pliant weight on his back.
Ye Ran still felt odd and started tugging at his ear. This time, “Shen Shi” couldn’t keep walking. His eyelid twitched, the hand holding Ye Ran’s knees tightening as his voice sank low: “…Ye Ran.”
Ye Ran ignored him, flipping his ear over and squinting closely at the base. “I remember you had a tiny mole here… where’s the mole?”
“Shen Shi” closed his eyes in restraint. “It’s too dark. Look again in the morning.”
“Oh.” Ye Ran was very disappointed. “Okay.”
Barely a few seconds of silence passed before he started messing with Shen Shi’s hair, curiously lifting the ends, leaning in close, so close his warm, soft breath brushed over him. For someone who’d been a lonely old virgin for twenty-eight years, this was torture.
“Shen Shi” took a deep breath, his voice rough and low. “What are you looking for now?”
“You had a little mole here too. A red one. Let me see…” Ye Ran frowned and lightly patted his stiff shoulder. “Lower your head.”
“Shen Shi” used the same excuse. “It’s too dark. I’ll show you tomorrow.”
“No.” Ye Ran said very seriously, “I want to see it now. Hurry up, hurry up.”
“Shen Shi’s” jaw tightened, his whole body rigid like a statue. After a few seconds, he surrendered and lowered his head, feeling those soft fingers brushing the back of his neck.
“Why isn’t it here…” Ye Ran muttered in confusion. “Where did Little Red go?”
He even gave it a name.
“Shen Shi” couldn’t help laughing. “Little Red might’ve gone to sleep. It’ll wake up in the morning.”
Ye Ran, dazed, was fooled. “Really?”
“Really.”
“Then I’ll look for Little Brown.”
“Shen Shi” froze and suddenly began doubting himself. Did he have an entire constellation of moles on him?
“What’s Little Brown?” he asked helplessly, slowing his steps, listening carefully to every word Ye Ran said.
“It’s the color of your hair,” Ye Ran said with a soft smile, resting his cheek against the man’s lean, firm shoulder and speaking sleepily. “You have a few brown hairs. The rest are black. I counted them.”
“Shen Shi” lowered his eyes, and his calm heart felt as if it were soaking in a pool of sour spring water in this noisy, cicada-filled autumn night. “You remember?”
“Of course I remember,” Ye Ran said obediently. “Besides Little Brown, there’s also Little Red… huh?”
He lifted a few strands of silver hair between his fingers, staring at them for a long moment. While “Shen Shi” quietly waited, Ye Ran suddenly gasped. “Shen Shi… you have Little Whites!”
“Shen Shi” was silent for a moment, then suddenly let out a soft laugh.
“What’s Little White?”
“It’s white hair!” Ye Ran clung nervously to his neck, panicked. “So many white hairs… one, two, three, four… ten, twelve, thirteen… wuu, why so many? I can’t count them…”
“Then don’t count.” “Shen Shi” stopped walking and turned his face slightly, gently comforting him. “Everyone gets white hair.”
“If you have white hair, you’ll get old,” Ye Ran said weakly. “I don’t want you to get old.”
Suddenly the next step felt hard to take.
“Shen Shi” stood quietly where he was, eyes lowered as he felt the gentle evening breeze. The plane trees rustled loudly, a few leaves falling at his feet, like slipping time and life.
His voice became very soft, very gentle. “Then if I really reach thirty, will you dislike me?”
“Hm?” Ye Ran sniffed, tilting his head in confusion. “What are you talking about? Why would I dislike you? When you’re thirty, I’ll be thirty too. We’ll grow old together.”
“Shen Shi” chuckled. “Then what if I’m thirty, but you’re still twenty?”
“I still won’t,” Ye Ran coaxed him helplessly, not understanding why Shen Shi was so sentimental today. “Even if you’re thirty, you’ll be a handsome uncle. Think about it—”
Ye Ran racked his brain, trying to soothe his overly-sensitive lover: “When you’re thirty, you’ll be good-looking, wealthy, successful, and still so kind, gentle, considerate… and you can cook… right and you’re filial and family-oriented. You’ll be the most perfect uncle in the entire thirty-year-old bracket.”
Ye Ran whispered, “When the time comes, it’ll be you who won’t like me anymore. Someone like me, a total newbie…”
“Won’t happen.” The person carrying him began walking again, his voice no longer the lazy, gentle one from before. It sank low, real and steady, full of certainty.
“No matter what age—”
His voice suddenly halted. Looking at the person not far away, his heart sank.
…
The parasol tree leaves rustled noisily in the wind.
A boy with a cold, fierce expression strode out from under the tree. His posture was tall and straight, his face as dark as water, his eyes filled with hostility. A gloomy chill surrounded him, so intense that passersby instinctively stepped back three feet, not daring to raise their heads.
‘Shen Shi’ curled his fingers, his expression returning to its usual calm. Unhurriedly, he stared at his younger self, who looked like someone whose beloved had just been stolen.
“You came really fast.” He almost muttered it to himself, scoffing.
In just a blink, Shen Shi had already walked up to him. His gaze was icy and dangerous when looking at him, but when speaking to Ye Ran on his back, his voice became unbelievably gentle: “Baby, why’d you run over here?”
Ye Ran was too sleepy to open his eyes. Hearing his voice, he lifted his head with difficulty, dazed, then opened his arms. “…Hug.”
Shen Shi’s heart melted. The hostility that filled his mind shifted seamlessly into fury toward ‘Shen Shi’. He carefully received Ye Ran, lowering his gaze, soothing his back with practiced motions to ease his drowsiness.
Ye Ran nuzzled him, obedient. “…I want to sleep.”
“Okay.” Shen Shi’s voice was warm. “Sleep.”
When Ye Ran was fully asleep, he gently carried him to a bench by the roadside and covered him with his jacket.
‘Shen Shi’ watched indifferently yet the next second, a fist nearly sliced through the wind, suddenly swinging viciously toward his face!
If that punch landed, he probably wouldn’t recover for a month.
He quickly turned sideways, his expression cooling.
The fist brushed past the tip of his nose, the sharp wind stinging his skin.
In front of him, Shen Shi stood tall, cracking his knuckles with a cold smile. His gaze was dripping with mockery, every word dripping superiority: “Come on. Let me see what progress the ‘me’ from ten years later has made.”
‘Shen Shi’ lifted the corner of his lips slightly at that, but his eyes grew even colder. Annoyed and impatient, he wanted to light a cigarette, but seeing the dozing Ye Ran, he tamped down the urge.
…So d*mn frustrating.
He looked at the younger, unrestrained version of himself, with a happy family and a lover by his side, this was a life he had never imagined for himself. All the lonely years he endured, in this Shen Shi’s eyes, were a future full of love and possibility.
Why was this kid so lucky?
Why did all the good things fall on him?
He straightened too, his gaze turning frigid as he looked at Shen Shi. It was as if he’d shed the layer of calm, noble composure, revealing arrogance and coldness identical to Shen Shi’s.
“Come,” he said, almost smiling, unhurried. “Let me see… what’s so special about you.”
…
The evening wind blew softly.
On the bench beside Spring Lake.
The taxi had just driven off. The driver glanced at the three people who had gotten out and sighed a little.
A pair of twins and… a little brother. Some families really were blessed.
The scenery at Spring Lake was beautiful. Laughter drifted from beyond the railings by the lake, flower boats drifting across the water. Except in winter when the lake froze, new visitors came almost every day.
‘Shen Shi’ pulled out a cigarette and handed it to the cold-faced Shen Shi beside him. His eyes flicked discreetly to the peacefully sleeping Ye Ran in Shen Shi’s arms. “Smoke?”
“No.” Shen Shi didn’t look up. After receiving a message from Yu Ting, he gently patted Ye Ran’s back, coaxing him into deeper sleep. “Strict rules at home.”
“When did Mom and Dad ever care about that?”
Father Shen smoked himself. Mother Shen disliked the habit, but knowing how much pressure the father and son faced in the company, she always let it slide.
Shen Shi said calmly, “Ye Ran doesn’t allow it.”
‘Shen Shi’: “…”
He let out a scoff. The hand holding the lighter paused, then after a moment he put the cigarette away. He leaned back lazily, admiring the lake.
The two had just fought, both sporting bruises, though they’d avoided hitting each other’s faces and went for hidden spots to hit hard.
‘Shen Shi’ was even worse than expected. He always acted refined and composed, but in truth he seemed ready to kick his balls off.
Shen Shi had been so angry he actually laughed. While staying on guard, he’d also thrown a jab at ‘Shen Shi’, asking him, “Don’t tell me you’ve never used it?”
As soon as that came out, their fighting noises scared the shop owner into rushing out, separating them and threatening to call the police.
The fact they were now peacefully sitting by the lake was thanks to that police threat.
The moist night wind brushed against their faces.
The lake was cold; Ye Ran slowly inched closer to Shen Shi’s neck, his cheeks flushed in sleep.
Shen Shi kissed his brow. Ye Ran, like a small creature finding its den, muttered something and stopped shifting restlessly.
‘Shen Shi’ quietly watched. His fingertips moved unconsciously, as if he could still feel that warm, soft touch on his back. In a daze, he heard Shen Shi’s cool question: “He doesn’t exist in your world?”
They both knew who “he” meant.
“No.” ‘Shen Shi’ came back to himself, looking forward. His voice was faint. “My college roommate was Yu Ting. The other two moved out in freshman year. We didn’t keep much contact.”
“No wonder.” Shen Shi let out a cold laugh, indifferent. “Don’t tell me you don’t even have friends?”
‘Shen Shi’ looked at him, smiling a little.
“At your age, I was already a boss,” he said.
People without joy naturally poured everything into work.
Shen Shi didn’t care. “What kind of little workshop?”
“So curious? Then go to my world and see.”
“As if you’d get that wish.”
…
‘Shen Shi’ didn’t continue the topic. He propped his chin on his hand, staring into the void with faint weariness.
After a long time, he said, “I’m leaving.”
“When?” Shen Shi asked.
“Probably in the next couple of days.”
Shen Shi nodded. “Oh. Safe trip.”
‘Shen Shi’ shot him a cool glance. “No need. After I’m gone, remember to take Mom for a full physical exam.”
“What do you mean?” Shen Shi’s brows knit, his expression turning cold. “Fine. I get it.”
Silence fell again.
Occasionally laughter drifted by, but some invisible barrier kept it out.
After a while, ‘Shen Shi’ suddenly spoke.
“My world is pretty interesting. Sure you don’t want to swap?”
Shen Shi brushed Ye Ran’s hair away from his forehead, his movements gentle, his tone cold. “Scram.”
‘Shen Shi’ didn’t mind. He lowered his gaze, watching Shen Shi’s movements. In his dark, deep eyes, it was as if Ye Ran’s sleeping profile was reflected there, meticulously, intently, as though he wanted to etch it into memory.
“You’re very lucky.” After a moment, he said softly.
Shen Shi lifted his eyes, signaling him to continue.
‘Shen Shi’ lowered his eyelids, not sure what he was looking at. As he wished, he continued calmly, “In countless worlds, only you met him.”
So many versions of Shen Shi still lived lonely, dull lives at every age.
Only in this world, this Shen Shi met someone young, someone he didn’t even understand yet, and bravely, wholeheartedly held onto him.
“When you go back, will you look for him?” In the quiet, Shen Shi suddenly asked.
“I will.”
‘Shen Shi’s’ expression was faint as he spoke the answer he had long known. “If I don’t try, how will I know?”
…
The wind grew stronger.
Mist seemed to drift along the lake.
‘Shen Shi’ stood up, his black hair blowing loose. Unhurried, he walked in another direction, his figure fading in the white fog.
At some moment, Shen Shi saw a completely clear, unblurred version of himself.
That version wore a suit, as if just leaving a banquet.
His shirt collar was unbuttoned at the top two buttons. His eyes looked tired, his aura refined and steady. His leather shoes stepped over the stone path at a measured pace, as his secretary said, “Madam wants you to go to Huating after the banquet. Miss Su is waiting there for you.”
He saw himself frown slightly, then nod lightly. “Arrange it.”
The secretary clearly sighed in relief. “Yes.”
A second before getting into the car, that version seemed to sense something. Across a long expanse of time, in the city lights at dusk, he looked over coldly, calmly.
His gaze instantly found Shen Shi and Ye Ran curled together on the bench.
The man’s deep eyes lingered on Ye Ran’s face for a moment, then he lowered his head. With his secretary and driver waiting, he got into the car.
The car drove toward an unknown future.
…
Shen Shi slowly tightened his hold on Ye Ran, like a dragon guarding treasure. His eyes were filled with warning and coldness after seeing a rival.
He listened to Ye Ran’s gentle breathing. And in his mind, he could still hear what ‘Shen Shi’ told him last night when they spoke alone.
…
“I don’t have my own Ye Ran.”
That usually lazy, casual, composed man tapped off some ash. The glowing cigarette tip blurred in the smoke. His eyes, under the haze, were deep, dim, without light. “Now that I’ve seen it, I don’t regret anymore.”
“You let me see another ending.”
Author’s Note: Except for Brother Zhouzi, the other worlds’ Little Shen and Little Ye will not meet.
Brother Zhouzi and Little Ye are like two preset programs that broke out of their frames and found each other.
Tomorrow we continue with Little Ye returning to the past.
It’s not a soul-swap. Brother Zhouzi is still this Brother Zhouzi. You’ll know soon (fist pump).
