He had put far too much force behind the shove. By the time the sharp clang of bronze crashing onto the floor startled him back to himself, she had already been thrown more than ten feet away.
The enormous bronze ram-shaped wine vessel landed barely three inches from her feet. Zhao Shu’s shoulders trembled. The grief that had only just burst forth was forcibly swallowed back down. Her back slammed hard against the wooden threshold of the screen. The pain instantly drove away every trace of drunkenness.
In that fleeting moment of clarity, she lifted her head and stared at him in stunned disbelief.
Tears that had not yet fallen spilled freely down her face. The corners of her eyes were flushed red, shrouded in mist. Those eyes held nothing now but fear and confusion.
The force of that shove had been overwhelming. She remembered only feeling as though she had been tossed away like a piece of discarded cloth.
Only moments earlier they had been talking peacefully. Why had he suddenly turned on her? It was as though he despised her enough to kill her.
All at once she remembered everything she herself had once done to him. Though the wine still clouded her mind, that realization remained crystal clear. She immediately lowered her gaze. The hurt and despair upon her face vanished, replaced by anxious dread. Drawing both hands and feet close to herself, she silently curled up against the corner of the wall.
Every change in her expression naturally fell into Ying Wuji’s eyes. The instant he had heard the bronze vessel strike the floor, regret had already flooded him. He had known she was little more than appearances. He simply had never imagined she was even more delicate than an ordinary young woman.
Even after shedding blood to reach the position he held today, there were still lines he refused to cross, never harming widows, orphans, the lonely, or the helpless.
He had intended to go over and help her up. But the moment he approached, the heat within his body surged once more. For one of the few times in his life, his expression darkened completely. His brows knitted tightly together. Turning abruptly aside, he strode past the screen and walked directly to the wall, where he removed his sword.
The instant he reached for it, he clearly saw the figure huddled in the corner flinch. After a brief moment’s thought, he ultimately said nothing.
When he finally left, he wore only a single fur-lined robe. He had forgotten even to take his cloak.
When Zhao Shu was finally sent back to the horse grounds, Cheng Wu clearly saw the traces of tears on her face and the lingering flush of drunkenness.
Holding the cloak his lord had forgotten to wear, he simply could not understand it. The two of them had drunk together until the middle of the night, how could they still end on such awkward terms?
After holding his tongue again and again, he finally relied upon the familiarity of having served Ying Wuji since childhood and ventured, “The hostage prince is still young. Now that the Zhou court’s position has become clear, all hope has truly been cut off… If Your Highness cares for him, you ought to speak a few kind words.”
Ying Wuji merely glanced at him without offering any explanation. Watching the figure in the distance who had already changed back into men’s clothing, he suddenly sighed. “She was born into the highest nobility. Does losing her position truly mean she has nothing left? Have you forgotten what we ourselves endured in the palace all those years ago?”
Indeed, he knew of the upheaval within the Royal Zhou house. He had simply never told her.
***
By the time Zhao Shu was escorted back to the horse grounds, it was already the fourth night watch. Once she settled down inside the thatched shelter, the wine she had drunk had almost entirely worn off.
She built a fire beneath the stove and set a pot of water to boil. While waiting for it to heat, she replayed everything that had happened that night. Before long, cold sweat had soaked her back.
Her hands trembled as she cupped the coarse porcelain bowl, still almost too hot to hold. Her throat was painfully dry. After blowing lightly across the surface, she drank the entire bowl of hot water in only a few gulps.
She had never met anyone so unpredictable. Only moments earlier, she had felt overwhelming murderous intent radiating from him. During those few short steps as he crossed the room to retrieve his sword, she had been convinced that its blade would fall upon her neck the very next instant.
That feeling was worse than simply fearing death.
What if there existed someone in this world who both saved you and hated you? Someone capable of killing you without the slightest effort.
After sobering up, sleep became impossible. Wrapped in a wool blanket beside the fire, she spent the entire night sitting there, consumed by doubt and unease, until dawn finally arrived.
***
The days afterward passed peacefully all the way into the second lunar month. No one disturbed Zhao Shu at the horse grounds. Qi Ying came every day to keep her company, and there were more than a dozen horses requiring her care. Little by little, she finally found some measure of peace.
That day, after finishing a satisfying meal, she and Qi Ying were exercising the horses beneath the warm sun when an unexpected visitor arrived.
The newcomer was dressed as a stable hand leading a horse. When he first called out to her, she merely thought his figure and voice seemed oddly familiar.
But the instant the youth raised an eyebrow with a grin, stepped closer, and peeled away the disguise from his face, Zhao Shu sucked in a sharp breath.
It was none other than her cousin by marriage, the very person who had nearly recognized her identity and assaulted her half a month earlier.
Noticing her tension, the youth hurriedly led the horse forward. “Hey, don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid. I went to a great deal of trouble to sneak in here. I brought this fine horse specially to apologize.”
As he spoke, his peach-blossom eyes darted back and forth between Zhao Shu and Qi Ying.
“Yingying, get on the horse and go back.” Doing her utmost to suppress her panic, Zhao Shu saw Qi Ying hesitate. She deliberately hardened her voice. “Listen to me.”
Though Qi Ying struggled to speak clearly, she could naturally sense Zhao Shu’s unease. The little girl had always been obedient. Yet this time, she clung tightly to Zhao Shu’s hand and refused to let go.
“Even when you’re angry you’re adorable. The beauties of Xianyang lose all their charm beside you.” Mi Rong reached out to offer the reins. For once, embarrassment actually appeared upon his face. “I drank too much that night. I truly behaved disgracefully…”
A sharp jade hairpin suddenly pointed directly at him. Before Zhao Shu could stop her, Qi Ying unexpectedly lashed out. The girl’s breathing came in hurried gasps. After struggling for quite some time, she finally forced out a broken sentence. “Don’t… covet… my young… master… Go away!”
Zhao Shu immediately panicked. She slapped the jade hairpin from Qi Ying’s hand and almost scolded her harshly to leave at once.
After only two steps, however, the little girl had already begun crying anxiously.
Qi Ying had seen Mi Rong’s true face that night. Everything had remained peaceful for half a month. His sudden appearance now could hardly mean anything good. Zhao Shu had originally intended to stall him with polite evasions until he finally left. Qi Ying’s outburst, however, threatened to play directly into his hands.
Just as Zhao Shu steeled herself to fight…
“All right, all right. I’m the unpleasant one.” To her surprise, Mi Rong suddenly became awkward. The frivolous flirtation disappeared from his manner altogether. For some reason, an uncontrollable irritation flickered within his peach-blossom eyes.
After sighing several times, he saw that Qi Ying was still crying. Picking up the fallen jade hairpin, he gently spun it between his fingers before tucking it neatly back into Qi Ying’s hair. “How boring. Don’t cry, little girl. Cousin, tell her not to cry. I’m really not a bad person.”
Though Zhao Shu had no idea what had happened, she could at least tell from his expression that today he truly had not come intending to bully her.
She stepped half a pace forward, glanced sideways at the discarded disguise skin in his hand, and asked politely but distantly, “I don’t deserve to be called your cousin. There’s no need to speak in circles. Why have you come?”
The youth finally withdrew his inquisitive gaze from Qi Ying and sincerely cupped his hands in greeting. “My aunt was in a good mood yesterday, so she had this horse prepared for me. I know you like horses. I really did come today to apologize… and to make peace.”
Ever since fleeing in confusion that night, all the beautiful young favorites who had once shared his bed had become as tasteless as chewing wax. Not one of them could stir even the slightest desire within him. After tormenting himself for so many days, he had no choice but to return to the source of the problem in search of an answer.
Originally, he had planned merely to scout things out. Once night fell, he had intended to satisfy his desires regardless of Heaven or earth. At worst, he would receive a severe scolding. He had already accepted that.
Yet seeing Zhao Shu now in men’s clothing, doing everything possible to shield the girl behind her, Mi Rong suddenly became bewildered. The images of Zhao Shu dressed as both man and woman overlapped before his eyes. From some forgotten abyss deep within his heart, faded memories buried for years slowly rose amid indistinct black-and-white flames, struggling to emerge.
The fire scorched the endless wasteland within him until nothing remained but blackened earth.
The last lingering trace of desire vanished in an instant, like smoke dispersed by the wind, leaving no trace behind.
“I really did only come to apologize.” Changing his mind completely, he led the snow-white horse, still without saddle or bridle, to a nearby tree and tied it there. “This horse has only recently been broken. I thought there would be horse trainers here. Spend some time letting it get used to you first. Don’t rush into riding it.”
Zhao Shu continued watching him warily. Feigning casual curiosity, she asked, “What is that you’re holding? Why did your appearance change just now?”
The youth turned back with an open smile. At first glance, he looked like nothing more than an innocent, bright-faced young man. Patiently and with obvious enthusiasm, he explained the principles behind disguise techniques.
Once Zhao Shu confirmed that the disguise had merely been a coincidence and not part of any plot against her, she still had no wish to become better acquainted with him. But one could hardly strike someone who greeted them with a smile.
Having already seen through her temperament, Mi Rong only became more shamelessly persistent, continuing to linger and chat without the slightest intention of leaving.
Even though his desire had vanished, since he was already here and had nothing better to do, teasing the two of them a little was harmless enough.
But just as the hostility between them had eased and he was about to ask in detail about their circumstances in the residence, a squad of personal guards came galloping over. The man who hurriedly dismounted at the front was none other than Steward Li, whom he had not seen for quite some time.
“Oh my, Young Master Chu! Duchess Yong has been looking for you everywhere.” Steward Li stumbled half a step, turned aside to catch his breath, then said to Zhao Shu, “This humble servant has brought a new horse trainer. By the master’s order… you are to be transferred to Lantai… yes, to Lantai… to serve as an attendant.”
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