All things fade.
Amid a gray and empty world, Feng Lezhen saw a figure approaching from afar.
“Royal Father,” she said softly.
Emperor Qianyuan had graying temples and looked just as she remembered him—kind and gentle as he gazed at her. “My Lezhen,” he said, “you’ve grown into a fine young lady.”
Feng Lezhen looked at him calmly. “Why are you appearing before me, Royal Father? Does this mean I’ve died?”
“Do you want to die?” Emperor Qianyuan asked.
Feng Lezhen’s expression remained indifferent. “That’s such a strange question. As if saying ‘no’ would actually make death spare me.”
She still remembered the blast—the heat, the deafening roar, the palace collapsing. She was not unaware of her current state.
“If you don’t wish to die, then you won’t,” Emperor Qianyuan said, looking directly into her eyes.
Feng Lezhen didn’t reply. She held his gaze for a long moment, then suddenly let out a soft laugh.
Pain. Burning pain. As though her whole body had been thrown into fire—so sharp it made even breathing feel shallow.
“Mm…”
Feng Lezhen’s eyes flew open. Agonizing pain shot up from her ankle, and her limbs throbbed along with it. Sweat poured down her back in an instant, and her vision darkened.
“Your Highness!”
A familiar voice called out. Someone gently helped her sit upright in their arms. Feng Lezhen’s breathing slowly steadied, and her vision began to clear.
In the darkness, she could just barely make out stone walls all around. Even above her, it was pitch black, except for a small hole in front of her, letting in a sliver of light.
They were inside a cave.
“How long have I been asleep?” she asked.
Chen Jinan replied, “This is already the second night.”
Feng Lezhen let out a soft hum from her throat.
“We’re on a small mountain about ten li upstream of Li Family Village,” Chen Jinan seemed to know what she was about to ask and lowered his voice as he answered. “After the front hall of the imperial mausoleum collapsed, Li Tong arrived with his men. Fearing they would find Your Highness, I took you and ran deeper into the mausoleum. But somehow, we ended up outside instead—and got blocked by a wide river. With no other choice, I jumped in with you. I lost consciousness halfway through…”
There was no need to explain the rest. She could guess what happened. He must have awakened first, found them both miraculously washed ashore, then, upon seeing palace guards searching nearby, carried her up into the mountains.
Feng Lezhen’s memory slowly returned. The last thing she remembered was the explosion—then Chen Jinan had thrown himself over her, shielding her as they crashed through a window… She steadied herself and looked up at him. “Are you hurt?”
Chen Jinan’s eyes shone with startling clarity. “Thanks to Your Highness, I’m completely fine.”
Feng Lezhen pressed her lips together and tried to sit up—but the moment her right foot moved, a bolt of pain shot through her. She sucked in a sharp breath, and her back was instantly soaked with sweat.
“Don’t move, Your Highness!” Chen Jinan quickly held her back. “Your foot was crushed by a boulder—likely a fracture. Best not to move it at all.”
Feng Lezhen looked down at her foot. After a long pause, she could make out that her ankle had been roughly splinted with branches and cloth. It seemed some medicine had been applied as well. Looking over the rest of her body, she saw that other wounds had also been treated with ointment.
“…Your servant deserves death. I administered medicine without Your Highness’s permission,” Chen Jinan said, voice lowered with guilt.
Feng Lezhen closed her eyes, weary. “You did the right thing.”
Only then did Chen Jinan finally let out a breath of relief.
The cave was silent. Outside, one could faintly hear the wind rustling through the branches. It was already September. Even in the capital, the chill of autumn had begun to creep in—especially in a stone cave like this, where the cold bit sharply.
In the darkness, Chen Jinan hesitated for a long while before carefully speaking. “To avoid being discovered, we can’t light a fire in here. If Your Highness is cold… you can lean against me.”
Feng Lezhen didn’t respond, nor did she move.
Chen Jinan pressed his lips together, debating whether to speak again, when suddenly her soft body leaned into him. He stiffened completely and hastily reached out to support her uninjured arm.
Feng Lezhen’s body ached all over, her mind was dull, and as she leaned into his chest, she noticed that the fabric of his clothing was softer than hers—and drier too.
“Where’s your armor?” she asked.
“I took it off earlier,” Chen Jinan answered quietly. “It was too heavy. I couldn’t carry Your Highness with it on.”
Feng Lezhen gave a quiet hum in response and, before long, drifted off again.
Listening to her increasingly even breathing, Chen Jinan carefully adjusted his position so she could rest more comfortably. The cave was narrow and tight, the stone walls icy cold. But his body was warm. Feng Lezhen instinctively nestled closer, gradually sleeping more soundly.
But that comfort didn’t last long. It was broken by a sudden coolness on her forehead. She let out a muffled groan and opened her eyes, finding the world still shrouded in darkness.
“Your Highness, you’ve developed a fever,” Chen Jinan said softly.
Feng Lezhen closed her eyes again. It was a while before she spoke. “I’m fine.”
“It’s a high fever,” Chen Jinan said, gently placing his hand to her forehead again.
Only then did Feng Lezhen realize the cool sensation had come from his hand. She wanted to raise her head to look at him, but lacked the strength. In the end, she stayed where she was, leaning on him. “…If I’m burning up like this, why are your hands cold?”
“I chilled them with a stone,” Chen Jinan replied hesitantly. “There’s no cold water here. I didn’t know how else to bring your temperature down.”
Feng Lezhen gave a raspy laugh. “Why not just use the stone directly?”
“It’s too hard. I was afraid it would hurt you,” Chen Jinan replied without hesitation this time.
“In times like this, there’s no need to be so particular. You’re great at everything—but when it comes to me…” She paused, then added with a faint smile, “You act like a child. Always being particular when there’s no need to be.”
Chen Jinan hadn’t expected that to be the assessment he’d get from Her Highness—“childish.” He’d always prided himself on his composure in front of her.
But perhaps it was the darkness amplifying his emotions. After a moment of silence, he really did act a little childish.
“…Your Highness,” he murmured, “can you not fall asleep again?”
“Why?” Feng Lezhen was already starting to get drowsy.
Chen Jinan said, “This humble one is afraid.”
Feng Lezhen opened her eyes. “Afraid of what?”
“Afraid that once Your Highness falls asleep, you won’t wake up again.” As he said this, Chen Jinan’s voice softened.
These past two days and nights, she had slept almost continuously—at times even stopped breathing. He had been trapped in the constant terror of losing her. The world felt vast and empty, and he was utterly alone.
Feng Lezhen hadn’t expected that answer. After a long silence, she reached out and held Chen Jinan’s fingers. “Then I won’t sleep. Tell me, what have you been doing all this time? Why did you suddenly become Yang Yueshan?”
“I never meant to become Yang Yueshan,” Chen Jinan said as he carefully cradled her, beginning the story. “It just happened by chance… I didn’t think much at the time, only that Your Highness’s influence in Lingnan was weak. If I could fool the Yang family, I might one day become of use to you.”
“Easy for you to say. The Yang family has been rooted in the South for generations. How could they trust you so easily?” Feng Lezhen didn’t buy his vague explanation and insisted he tell her everything, down to the last detail.
Chen Jinan was never good at going against her. After a moment of silence, he admitted, “It wasn’t easy, of course. But fortunately, I had Mr. Shen’s help.”
“Suifeng?” Feng Lezhen sounded surprised.
Chen Jinan nodded instinctively, forgetting he was still holding her—his chin accidentally bumped into the top of her head, and he froze immediately, not daring to move.
“Yes, him,” Chen Jinan replied in a low voice. “I didn’t want to involve anyone else, but the Yang family insisted on a blood-test for kinship. I didn’t want to back down halfway, so I had no choice but to ask Mr. Shen for help…”
“And did you fool them?” Feng Lezhen asked with a smile.
“We did, but it made things even more dangerous,” Chen Jinan replied. “After Yang Cheng died, every child and grandchild in the Yang family wanted to fill the power vacuum. I, the sudden illegitimate son, became a thorn in everyone’s side.”
“Yang Cheng was just a low-ranking official appointed by the court, and he happened to run amok in Lingnan for a few years. Did he really think he was the next Qi Zhen?” Feng Lezhen scoffed.
“I thought the same, but they couldn’t see it,” Chen Jinan said. “While I was in the Yang household, I was constantly ambushed by assassins, poisoned now and then. Mr. Shen saw how miserable I was and stayed to help for a while. He only left when news came from Yunming that the shizi of the Qi family had taken ill.”
“How is Jingqing?” At the mention of the Qi shizi’s illness, Feng Lezhen immediately asked.
Chen Jinan paused briefly. “Nothing serious. Mr. Shen came back to me two months later.”
Only then did Feng Lezhen feel at ease.
The cave fell silent for a short while, until Feng Lezhen broke it. “And then? Why did you end up leading troops to suppress the rebellion?”
“When Yang Cheng forcefully suppressed the people, it brought temporary peace but planted seeds of greater disaster. Sure enough, not long after I returned to the Yang household, Lingnan was in turmoil again. I couldn’t stand by and watch the government harm the people, so I took the mess into my own hands,” Chen Jinan explained.
Feng Lezhen paused. “Would the authorities and the Yang family really let you do that?”
“They wanted someone to take the fall, and they hated me enough to want me dead. Of course they supported it wholeheartedly,” Chen Jinan said.
Feng Lezhen laughed. “And in the end, you single-handedly pacified Lingnan and received an imperial edict from Feng Ji, appointing you to Yang Cheng’s position. They must have regretted it bitterly.”
Thinking of those people’s expressions when the edict arrived, Chen Jinan couldn’t help but lift the corners of his lips.
“These past days…” Feng Lezhen sighed, “you’ve worked hard.”
“I didn’t feel it was hard.”
They talked idly, back and forth. The heat gradually left Feng Lezhen’s body, and suddenly she felt cold—freezing. Chen Jinan noticed how tightly she was clinging to him and carefully pulled her closer, using his body warmth to keep her from freezing.
But it wasn’t enough.
“Cold…” Feng Lezhen’s mind grew more and more muddled. She burrowed toward him purely on instinct.
His body was hot, radiating heat like a furnace. But to her, it still felt like there was a layer between them. Feng Lezhen felt like she was conscious—yet not. She only knew to keep leaning closer.
Chen Jinan tried his best to avoid her wounds and held her even tighter. Still, her body grew colder and colder.
There were nearly two hours left before dawn. If her temperature kept dropping before the sun rose, she wouldn’t last much longer. Chen Jinan rested his hand on her thin back, silent for a long while before finally making up his mind.
“Forgive me, Your Highness.”
Feng Lezhen’s eyelashes fluttered, but she didn’t even have the strength to ask what he was going to do.
A moment later, she suddenly felt a chill—then her body was pressed against something hot.
Feng Lezhen forced her eyes open and saw a firm, lean chest—and her own figure pressed tightly against it, the curves distorted by the closeness.
She was silent for a moment, then let out a breathless laugh. “I just said you’re always overly proper at the wrong times, and now suddenly that trait’s gone.”
She had never imagined that he would actually remove both their clothes and wrap her bare body completely in his arms.
Chen Jinan’s body was taut with tension. After a long pause, he said hoarsely, “As long as Your Highness lives, this humble one will take any punishment.”
“Who told you to die for it?” Feng Lezhen closed her eyes again. Without much strength, she lightly touched his abdomen. “So tired… I don’t think I can hold on much longer.”
She still remembered the promise she had made to Chen Jinan earlier.
Chen Jinan silently tightened his embrace. “Then rest, Your Highness. I’ll keep watch.”
“You’re not afraid anymore?” Feng Lezhen murmured.
He held her even closer. “No. I can feel your heartbeat.”
Feng Lezhen let out a faint laugh. She tried to say something else, but only a few incoherent sounds came out.
His body continued to radiate warmth. The bitter cold that had seeped into her bones slowly faded. Exhaustion crashed over her like a collapsing mountain, a surging tide, pulling her completely under.
Just as she was drifting off, Chen Jinan suddenly spoke in a low voice: “Your Highness, this humble one has never once thought of betraying you.”
“Mm…” Feng Lezhen tightened her hold on his fingers and fell asleep just like that.
In the narrow mountain cave, under the pitch-dark night, a man and a woman pressed skin to skin, sharing body warmth and heartbeats. It should have been the most tender and sensual of scenes, but Chen Jinan’s heart held no disrespect. He remained alert to the sounds around them while tightening his arms, solemnly holding the only deity in his life.
With the first light at the edge of the sky, the grueling night finally ended.
After a crisp birdsong, Feng Lezhen’s consciousness slowly returned. Before she even opened her eyes, she reached down to touch her body.
Her clothes had already been put back on, even the sash tied neatly—as if the intimate embrace for warmth last night had been nothing but a dream.
Feng Lezhen slowly opened her eyes. The large cave was empty except for her. She pinched the bridge of her nose, sat in silence for a moment, and then braced against the ground to sit up with difficulty.
Dawn had arrived, and light had spilled into the cave. Feng Lezhen immediately saw her right foot bound with branches. Just as she found it amusing, she lowered her head and spotted faint bloodstains all over her clothes.
Though her entire body ached, there weren’t many injuries. Aside from her wrist and a few cuts along her waist, most of her upper body was intact… If intact, then where had the blood come from? Moreover, these stains were superficial, as if she had brushed against something and picked them up by accident. Feng Lezhen furrowed her brows, the smile at her lips slowly fading.
When Chen Jinan entered, he saw her sitting with her eyes lowered, deep in thought.
“…Your Highness,” he called gently.
Feng Lezhen lifted her gaze to meet his. Her eyes were devoid of much emotion.
Chen Jinan assumed she misunderstood him for abandoning her, and quickly explained, “I—I didn’t leave. I was just afraid you’d be hungry upon waking, so I went to pick some wild fruits…”
As he spoke, he offered the fruits to her.
But Feng Lezhen didn’t take them.
Chen Jinan’s heart sank. He immediately knelt down. “This humble one deserves to die.”
Feng Lezhen’s eyelids twitched. “What are you doing?”
“This humble one was disrespectful to Your Highness last night, and should be put to death. If Your Highness is angry, it is only right. It’s just… the road ahead is uncertain. I beg Your Highness to let this humble one survive for now. Once I return Your Highness safely to the capital, I will die to atone!” Chen Jinan was already on his knees, still carefully holding the wild fruits.
Feng Lezhen had only meant to scare him a little, hoping to get the truth out of him quicker. Who knew she’d overdo it—and that he’d misunderstand entirely.
She sighed and said, “Get up. I don’t blame you for what happened last night.”
Chen Jinan froze, then cautiously raised his head. “Truly?”
“When have I ever lied to you?” Feng Lezhen lifted an eyebrow.
Chen Jinan was silent for a moment. Seeing that she didn’t seem to be lying, he finally let out a breath. “Then… why are you unhappy, Your Highness?”
“You’ll have to ask Guard Chen,” Feng Lezhen replied with a half-smile.
Hearing her call him “Guard Chen” instead of “General Yang,” Chen Jinan let out a short laugh, though he was still uneasy. “This humble one truly doesn’t know…”
“Let me just ask you: are you injured or not?” Feng Lezhen didn’t want to keep playing games.
Chen Jinan, usually so clear-eyed and forthright, suddenly looked evasive. Then he noticed the bloodstains before her. He had watched over her for two whole days, even noticing the slightest changes in her breathing—but somehow, he had overlooked these faint marks. Now that she had spotted them, he knew he couldn’t hide it any longer.
“Jinan,” Feng Lezhen called him by name, her tone displeased.
Chen Jinan’s throat bobbed. After a long pause, he said quietly, “I was injured… but it’s nothing serious.”
“Take off your clothes.” Since he wouldn’t give her a straight answer, she might as well see for herself.
Chen Jinan’s brows furrowed immediately at her command, but he didn’t defy her—he never did. He only moved slowly. Feng Lezhen, having recovered quickly after the fever broke, took the fruit he’d offered and began eating, leisurely watching him undress without rushing him at all.
Chen Jinan continued slowly peeling off his clothes. When he was down to his inner garments, his hand trembled slightly—but he quickly took a deep breath and quietly rolled the underclothes up and stuffed them into the pile of outerwear. Feng Lezhen watched as each blood-stained piece of clothing fell away. When he finally removed the last layer, he stood fully revealed before her.
It was the body of a grown, healthy man—defined arms, lean muscles at his abdomen, his entire physique radiating a quiet, potent strength. Maybe it was the cold, or nerves, but his body was tense, and the lines of his frame were sharp and clear.
The boy who had once been skinny and rough around the edges had finally grown into a handsome man. It was a pity Feng Lezhen had no mood to admire his beauty. Her brows furrowed as soon as she saw the red blotches on his skin.
He was pale by nature, clean and proper, and when embarrassed his skin would flush lightly. That kind of red was alive, would deepen or fade. But this—this was a lifeless red, dry and cracked as if it might split at any time.
“What happened?” she asked in a low voice.
Chen Jinan paused, then answered, “After the gunpowder exploded, the armor I was wearing was heated up. Even though there were clothes underneath, it still scorched me.”
That’s right—it was a burn. Not enough to blister, but still damaging to the skin. No wonder it looked so wrong. Feng Lezhen took a slow, steady breath. In her mind’s eye, she saw him again—throwing himself over her as the explosion erupted. If he hadn’t shielded her with his body, it would’ve been her covered in burns now.
No… maybe worse. She wasn’t someone who could dodge danger at the last moment like he could.
“…Don’t worry, Your Highness. They’re just minor wounds. It’s already healing over the past two days. It doesn’t even hurt,” Chen Jinan saw the change in her expression and clumsily tried to comfort her.
Feng Lezhen pressed her lips together and said, “Turn around.”
Chen Jinan paused.
“I know your back is more severely injured,” Feng Lezhen looked at him calmly, as if she could see right through him.
Chen Jinan was silent for a moment. Although unwilling, he still turned around.
The moment he’d said his wounds came from the armor heating up, Feng Lezhen had guessed that his back must be worse—after all, when he had leapt to shield her, it was his back facing the explosion.
Yet even prepared as she was, when he turned around, her eyes still flew wide open—
The once well-defined muscles on his back were now almost entirely ruined by burns. Bloodied flesh mixed with bits of grass and torn fabric; perhaps because he’d undressed too quickly earlier, some wounds had torn open again and were now beading with fresh blood.
Feng Lezhen’s heart skipped a beat, and she suddenly understood something. “How long did you carry me on your back?”
“…Not for very long.” Since she hadn’t told him to turn back around, Chen Jinan didn’t dare look at her.
The silence behind him made him uneasy. Normally reticent, he couldn’t help but speak first: “Truly, not that long, and it doesn’t hurt much. These wounds only look scary—they’re just surface—”
A hand gently touched one of the wounds on his back. The pain instantly bloomed, spreading numbness and soreness across his entire back. Chen Jinan’s shoulders tensed. After a moment, he cautiously said, “It really doesn’t hurt…”
“You knew you were this badly injured, yet you used all the medicine on me?” Feng Lezhen cut him off.
Chen Jinan paused, then turned around hesitantly.
“Because Your Highness is more important,” he said seriously.
Feng Lezhen let out a breathy laugh, her eyes slightly red at the corners. “How foolish.”
“I’m not foolish. I know what matters most.” Chen Jinan supported her arm to keep her injured foot from bearing weight. “Your Highness needn’t worry either. Mister Shen taught me to recognize herbs. I actually already picked some earlier—they’re just outside the cave. I was planning to secretly apply them myself, but I suppose that’s no longer necessary.”
Feng Lezhen finally relaxed. “Bring them in. I’ll apply them for you.”
“Yes.” Chen Jinan helped her sit back down before reaching for his clothes.
Feng Lezhen said, “No need to put your shirt back on. It’s better to air it out than to keep it covered.”
“Yes.”
Chen Jinan immediately put down the bloodied underclothes and instead reached for his trousers. As he bent to put them on, a certain part of him shifted with the motion. Feng Lezhen turned her head away, slightly embarrassed.
As soon as he was dressed, Chen Jinan went out and soon returned with a handful of green plants.
“This is bleeding-stem herb. It’ll sting at first, but the pain will fade and the bleeding will stop.” As he spoke, Chen Jinan crushed a few leaves and handed them over. “Sorry to trouble Your Highness.”
Feng Lezhen accepted the leaves and carefully applied them to his back, cleaning out debris as she went. By the time she finished applying all the medicine, both of them were covered in sweat.
Unknowingly, it was already late morning. Chen Jinan immediately moved to head back out for more fruit, but Feng Lezhen stopped him. “I’m not hungry. You don’t need to go.”
“Your Highness only ate two fruits this morning. How could you not be hungry?” Chen Jinan smiled. “Don’t worry about me—I really don’t hurt anymore.”
Seeing his color looking decent, Feng Lezhen did feel more at ease, but she still said with concern, “If you can’t find anything, it’s fine—just come back quickly.”
“Yes!” Chen Jinan responded readily and went out again.
Feng Lezhen watched his figure disappear into the distance, then her gaze fell again on her injured right foot.
After a long while, she sighed softly.
