In the ensuing silence, Fu Zhixian recalled her earlier comment about the harem’s three hundred chambers and chuckled.
Feng Lezhen looked at him. “What are you laughing at?”
“I’m laughing at you,” Fu Zhixian raised his eyes, the smile still on his lips, “for being able to say something like ‘make you a concubine’ to my face. You and I were betrothed by the late emperor himself—we exchanged formal betrothal cards before the ancestors of the Great Qian royal family. We are a legitimate engaged couple. So why should I now have to give up the position of Emperor Consort to someone else?”
“We’re already disengaged,” Feng Lezhen said. She knew how proud he was, that he’d never willingly stand below anyone else—that’s why she had said it on purpose.
Fu Zhixian replied, “Then we’ll get engaged again.”
“And if I refuse?” Feng Lezhen asked.
Fu Zhixian said, “Then you’d better think it through, Your Highness. Those civil officials are as annoying as can be. If they’re not dealt with all at once, who knows how many years they’ll keep pestering you?”
Feng Lezhen narrowed her eyes, falling into sudden silence.
Fu Zhixian wasn’t in a rush. After stating his condition, he looked away and began pouring himself tea.
The stream of water glistened like crystal, clear and bright as it fell into the cup—like pearls on a jade plate, ringing with a crisp sound.
Once the tea was poured, Feng Lezhen finally spoke: “You’re threatening me.”
“This isn’t a threat. It’s a transaction,” Fu Zhixian said, meeting her eyes.
A flicker of displeasure crossed Feng Lezhen’s face. “Fu Zhixian, we’ve known each other nearly twenty years. After all these years, you should know my temperament.”
“It’s because I know it that I’ve resorted to this,” Fu Zhixian said, his tone gentle and helpless. “Otherwise, I really don’t know what else I could do… to return to your side.”
Feng Lezhen fell silent.
After a long pause, she let out a soft sigh. “What happened in the past life… it’s all over now. I repaid you with an arrow, nearly took your life. You helped me several times in return—risked yourself to capture Feng Ji and indirectly saved me. I… we’re even now. I no longer resent you.”
“You don’t resent me. And then what?” Fu Zhixian’s voice was quiet.
Feng Lezhen said nothing.
Fu Zhixian lowered his eyes and pushed the teacup toward her. Feng Lezhen paused for a moment, then stepped forward and picked it up—but didn’t drink.
“I know you dislike deals like this,” Fu Zhixian said softly. “But don’t be so quick to reject it—just think about it. Once you become emperor, the person standing beside you can’t interfere too much in politics, but they do need to help win over ministers and noble families, balance the front court and back palace, and offer you counsel during difficult decisions… When you think it over carefully, there really is no one more suitable for that position than me.”
Feng Lezhen’s eyes flickered slightly as she took a small sip of tea.
Fu Zhixian slowly rose to his feet, casually closing the distance between them. “More importantly, I’m not like other men—I have no ambition to seize power or take the throne. I’ve practically severed ties with the Fu family, so there won’t be any issues of powerful in-laws. I will give everything I have to support you and will never harbor a second heart.”
He was a head taller than Feng Lezhen. By the time he said the last sentence, she had to lift her head slightly to meet his gaze.
Their eyes locked. Fu Zhixian’s Adam’s apple moved faintly, and after a moment, he slowly lowered his head.
Feng Lezhen watched as he closed his eyes. His handsome features loomed larger and larger before her. Just as he was about to kiss her, she instinctively turned her face away.
His lips brushed softly against the corner of hers. Fu Zhixian paused, slowly opened his eyes, and when he looked at her again, there was a faint despair in them.
“You still don’t trust me.” His voice was hoarse.
Feng Lezhen’s lashes trembled slightly. She didn’t look up at him. “When you charged into the palace without knowing whether I was dead or alive, I never doubted your loyalty again.”
Fu Zhixian: “Then why…”
“Zhixian, the things you said just now—I believe you can do all of them. But are you sure you have the heart to tolerate others?” Feng Lezhen interrupted him and looked into his eyes once more.
Fu Zhixian paused, then gave a laugh. “What do you mean, tolerate others…”
“To be Emperor Consort, talent isn’t necessary. Nor is a powerful family background. What matters most is the capacity for tolerance. You’re smart and you’re good at cleaning up after things,” she reached up and gently touched his face. “Back then, any man who showed even the slightest interest in me was quietly erased by you. I didn’t intervene at the time because I didn’t want to. But now it’s different. Now…”
“Now there’s Chen Jinan,” Fu Zhixian continued coldly, following her words, “and other messy, troublesome men. For their safety alone, you’ll never let me be your official consort—am I right, Your Highness?”
Feng Lezhen pressed her lips together and didn’t respond.
Fu Zhixian took a deep breath, slowly calming himself. Once he was composed, he smiled again. “If that’s your only concern, then it’s easily resolved. I can promise to be more magnanimous in the future. As long as those men behave themselves and don’t harm you, I…”
“That’s not the only reason.” Feng Lezhen interrupted again, frowning as if she didn’t want to keep explaining.
Fu Zhixian’s smile gradually faded. “What else is there?”
Feng Lezhen looked at him, eyes filled with pity.
Her gaze made Fu Zhixian feel a sudden ache in his chest, but he still forced himself to stay calm. “Tell me. You know me—if your reason can’t convince me, I won’t be able to let this go.”
“Because…” Feng Lezhen was silent for a long time, but finally said the words, “I don’t want to.”
Fu Zhixian stared at her, stunned. His always-charming eyes suddenly turned red.
She said… she didn’t want to.
If it had been for any other reason, he could have kept persuading her. But she said she didn’t want to. What else could he say to that? How could he possibly argue?
Fu Zhixian let out a bitter, ridiculous laugh, his expression lost and uncertain.
He had always been elegant, noble. Even with the world falling apart, he kept his dignity. Feng Lezhen had never seen him so lost, so disheveled, on the verge of losing all his pride.
They had known each other for nearly twenty years, like two trees growing side by side—branches appearing to lean away from each other as they grew taller, but below ground, their roots had long been deeply entwined, impossible to truly separate. His pain made Feng Lezhen ache as well. For a fleeting moment, she almost said yes.
But in the end, she didn’t.
The human heart is hard to read. One’s nature even harder to change. Though he said he would learn to be more tolerant, true change was harder than ascending to heaven. And even if he did change, deep down… she didn’t believe it.
That lack of belief was like planting a seed of suspicion. In the future, should palace intrigue arise—as it always does wherever people gather—he would be the first she would suspect. And how many times can a relationship survive being doubted? With his temperament, if he were trapped in the small world of the harem for too long, wouldn’t he eventually come to resent her?
She was someone destined to be emperor. The one beside her didn’t need to be clever or knowledgeable. But she needed to be able to entrust the rear palace to them without worry—without having to deal with petty household strife after finishing state affairs.
But if she said all this too bluntly, it would be too cruel for Fu Zhixian.
So she softened her tone and said quietly, “You were born under the literary star. You should be achieving great things in the front court. To be confined to the inner palace would be a waste of your talents. If you’re willing, I’ll make you Prime Minister. You’ll be second only to the throne—what do you say?”
“And then?” Fu Zhixian had regained his composure. “When Her Highness has free time, she’ll come visit me?”
Feng Lezhen looked at him silently.
Fu Zhixian gave a short laugh, his eyes locked onto hers. “Forget it. It’s not like I haven’t been Prime Minister before. What Her Highness can offer me now might not even be as much as what I earned myself in the last life.”
“There’s nothing else I can give you,” Feng Lezhen met his gaze steadily.
They looked at each other for a long while. Fu Zhixian finally stepped back, straightening his spine. “In that case, there’s nothing more to say. I hope Her Highness won’t regret this.”
A trace of finality flashed through his eyes. Then he turned and left without looking back.
As they passed by each other, Feng Lezhen instinctively turned to look—only to see his slender figure gradually swallowed by the blazing sunlight.
“Zhixian,” she called.
Fu Zhixian stopped. His voice was light when he replied, “Don’t worry. I’m not that heartbroken. I came today just to try my luck, that’s all.”
With that, he left.
The large room was left with only Feng Lezhen. She stood there for a long time. The tea on the table had long gone cold.
When Ah Ye peeked in, she saw Her Highness standing silently at the table, head slightly lowered. She hesitated for a moment, then stepped forward and saluted.
“Your Highness.”
“…The tea has gone cold. Change the pot,” Feng Lezhen said calmly.
Ah Ye acknowledged her and began tidying up. As she placed the teapot and teacups onto the tray, her eyes happened to catch something on the chair beside her. She let out a curious “Hm?” and picked it up, turning to Feng Lezhen with a puzzled expression. “Your Highness, what’s this?”
Feng Lezhen paused, lifted her gaze to the object in Ah Ye’s hand, and said nothing for a long time.
Since autumn had arrived in the capital, the days had been getting shorter with each passing one. It was only early evening, yet the sun had already set.
Lamps were lit in the room. The white paper windows were stained with a warm amber glow. Ah Ye walked out of the room looking worried and immediately ran into Fan Gonggong.
“Her Highness still won’t eat?” Fan Gonggong asked kindly.
Ah Ye nodded, distressed. “I’ve asked her three times already, and she still refuses. Doctor Shen said the medicine must be taken after meals. If she won’t eat, she can’t take the medicine. And if she doesn’t take the medicine, her body won’t recover. If she doesn’t get better…”
“All right,” Fan Gonggong interrupted with a helpless smile, “if Her Highness won’t eat, what can we do? I say stop trying to persuade her for now. Just wait outside the door. If she still hasn’t changed her mind in an hour, then…”
He raised a hand in gesture. Ah Ye immediately leaned in to listen.
After hearing his instructions, Ah Ye’s eyes widened. “Will that really work?”
“Absolutely,” Fan Gonggong said with confidence.
Ah Ye nodded and obediently went to stand watch by the door.
To her, Fan Gonggong’s advice was like a calming draught. She stopped checking the room so frequently and quietly kept track of time. When nearly an hour had passed, she quickly wrote a letter and had it sent to that “General Yang.”
When Chen Jinan received the letter, another half an hour had already gone by. He immediately prepared to leave, but as he reached the door, he glanced down at his overly conspicuous moon-patterned brocade robe. After some thought, he took it off and changed into a plain, dark robe.
Looking at how easily it blended into the shadows, Chen Jinan nodded in satisfaction and headed out.
Since he publicly declared that he no longer served Feng Ji, he had moved out of Feng Ji’s private residence. Now he lived in a temporary home he had bought. It wasn’t very large—just three courtyards in total. He lived in the innermost one, and Shen Suifeng lived in the front.
Which meant, to leave, he had to pass through Shen Suifeng’s courtyard.
Remembering how Shen Suifeng had gritted his teeth warning him not to sneak off again, Chen Jinan felt a bit guilty. He held his breath and crept along the wall carefully. It took him a full quarter hour just to reach Shen Suifeng’s courtyard gate. Just one more door and he’d be outside. He exhaled quietly in relief, but just as he opened the door, he froze—someone was standing outside.
Shen Suifeng also froze when he met Chen Jinan’s eyes. Instinctively, he asked, “What are you sneaking off to now?”
Chen Jinan immediately straightened. “I… I couldn’t sleep. Just going out for a walk.”
“A walk, and you specifically changed into nightwear?” Shen Suifeng sneered, having clearly noted the dark robe.
Chen Jinan pressed his lips together. “This isn’t nightwear. It’s just a black robe.”
“I don’t care if it’s a black robe or a white one—have your wounds healed well enough for you to be running around?” Shen Suifeng snorted. “You’re just lucky I’m old now and don’t have the energy to argue with you. If it were me in my younger years, dealing with a disobedient patient like you, I’d have stopped treating you—or given you a packet of poison to send you on your way and save the trouble…”
“Why are you carrying luggage?” Chen Jinan suddenly asked.
Shen Suifeng paused, his expression turning slightly awkward.
“You’re leaving?” Chen Jinan slowly realized.
Shen Suifeng gave a soft cough and adjusted the bundle on his back. “Her Highness hasn’t ascended the throne yet, so I won’t leave the capital for now… I ran into Imperial Physician Cui the other day—we’ve been friends for many years. He invited me to stay with him for a while. I couldn’t refuse, so I agreed.”
“If you just wanted to catch up, you could go visit. Why move in?” Chen Jinan asked, confused. “Did I treat you poorly?”
“No, not at all. You… you were fine.” Shen Suifeng smiled faintly.
“Then why are you leaving?”
As he spoke, Chen Jinan reached for Shen Suifeng’s bundle.
Shen Suifeng hurriedly dodged. “Hey… don’t pull! I’m going to Physician Cui’s house!”
“Go for what? The capital may look peaceful, but under the surface it’s full of hidden currents. Staying here with me is safest,” Chen Jinan insisted, trying to take the bag.
“Watch your wound! Stop pulling. It’s just as safe at Physician Cui’s place. And what do court intrigues have to do with us common folk? As long as no wars break out, it has nothing to do with me. Let go, let go!”
Though still fairly nimble, Shen Suifeng was no match for the brute strength of a seasoned general. As he saw his bundle about to be taken, he finally snapped. “I just don’t want to live here with you anymore!”
Chen Jinan froze. “Why?”
“You still have the nerve to ask?” Shen Suifeng laughed angrily. “I’m petty, okay? I can’t stand watching you and Her Highness being all lovey-dovey. Is that good enough for you?”
Chen Jinan blinked, his grip slackening.
Shen Suifeng snatched back his bundle, cast him a sidelong glance, and said, “All those times you snuck out—wasn’t it all for her? Still think it’s romantic, don’t you? I’m moving out. Out of sight, out of mind. It’s easier on my heart.”
“…You haven’t let Her Highness go?” Chen Jinan’s brows gradually knit together.
Shen Suifeng gave a short laugh. “Ask any of the men in Her Highness’s past—have any of them really let go?”
Chen Jinan was silent for a long time, then said, “If you haven’t, why not stay?”
Shen Suifeng paused, his expression becoming subtly complicated. “You’re not jealous?”
“I just want Her Highness to be happy,” Chen Jinan answered calmly.
Shen Suifeng was quiet for a long moment, then finally gave a sigh and patted his shoulder. “The moment I saw you, I knew—you were the one who’d stay with Her Highness in the end. Truly…”
He let out a bitter laugh. “It’s a pity that you have the capacity to tolerate others, but I don’t. Moving out gives me peace of mind.”
Chen Jinan could see that he was truly resolute, and in the end, he nodded. “Alright.”
Shen Suifeng let out a breath and smiled. “Help me tell Her Highness that I’ll be at Physician Cui’s residence waiting. If she ever needs my help in the future, she can come find me anytime.”
“Okay.”
“And those medicines I prepared for her—she must take them on time. She’s still young now, so many illnesses haven’t shown yet. If she waits until she’s older to start caring for her body, it’ll be too late.” Shen Suifeng reminded.
Chen Jinan asked, “Why don’t you tell her yourself?”
“You tell her first,” Shen Suifeng smiled. “When she comes to find me, I’ll tell her again. The more times she hears it, the more likely she’ll remember.”
“Alright.”
The carriage had already arrived. Shen Suifeng glanced at Chen Jinan, patted him on the shoulder, and left first. Chen Jinan watched him board the carriage and only turned to leave in the opposite direction once his figure disappeared into the darkness.
By the time he arrived at the Eldest Princess Residence, night had already deepened. Ah Ye had reheated the medicine again and again. Seeing him, she quickly came forward. “Her Highness has to take the medicine after eating. Please persuade her to eat dinner first.”
Chen Jinan nodded and entered the room with his head lowered. The room was brightly lit. Feng Lezhen was sitting on the floor, casually leaning against a pillar, her eyes lowered as if deep in thought.
Hearing footsteps, she pinched her brow. “I already said I’m not hungry…”
“Your Highness.”
When Feng Lezhen heard Chen Jinan’s voice, she paused and lifted her head. A trace of helplessness flashed across her face. “Why are you here again? Did that girl Ah Ye send you?”
Chen Jinan crouched down in front of her and only then noticed something bright yellow on the floor beside her hand. Since assuming Yang Yueshan’s identity, he had seen quite a few such items, though the design of this one seemed different.
Seeing that Feng Lezhen didn’t stop him, he picked it up. After seeing the content, he froze.
“Your Highness, this is…” When he spoke, his voice could hardly hide the shock.
Feng Lezhen closed her eyes briefly, then looked up at him. “I’m going into the palace—to see Feng Ji.”
“Alright.” Chen Jinan nodded.
Feng Lezhen paused. “You’re not going to try to talk me out of it?”
“Someone already tried?” Chen Jinan asked in return.
Feng Lezhen was silent for a moment. “Ah Ye, Wanwan, Fan Gonggong all tried. They said the palace gates are closed for the night, and opening them late would break protocol—it’s better not to go, to avoid gossip.”
She must’ve been persuaded quite a few times to recount it so smoothly. Chen Jinan’s eyes curved with a faint smile. “If Your Highness wants to go, then go. If the sky falls, I’ll hold it up.”
Feng Lezhen pressed her lips together, her expression softening a little.
“But before that… could Your Highness eat something first?” Chen Jinan asked carefully.
Feng Lezhen was silent for a moment, then nodded. “Alright.”
Chen Jinan let out a long sigh of relief and immediately went to the door to tell Ah Ye to bring in the meal. Ah Ye had already been prepared, and upon hearing the request, she quickly carried the dishes inside. As soon as she entered, she saw Feng Lezhen still sitting on the ground and was about to invite her to stand when Chen Jinan silently shook his head.
Ah Ye glanced at Feng Lezhen worriedly but turned and left.
Chen Jinan picked up a bowl and added a bit of each dish before returning to Feng Lezhen’s side and sitting down on the floor beside her.
“Your Highness, allow me to feed you,” he said sincerely.
Feng Lezhen gave him a glance and said nothing, but when the food was brought to her lips, she didn’t refuse.
Bite by bite, the bowl in Chen Jinan’s hands soon emptied. Just as he was about to get more, Feng Lezhen sighed. “I’m full.”
Hearing this, Chen Jinan immediately set down the bowl and chopsticks. “Then Your Highness, please go change. I’ll ready the carriage—we’ll head to the palace right away.”
Feng Lezhen looked at his features for a long moment, then let out a soft chuckle. “Forget it. Let’s go tomorrow.”
Chen Jinan secretly let out a breath of relief, though it didn’t show on his face.
“Shall I help Your Highness up?” he asked again.
Feng Lezhen gave a soft “Mm” and extended her hand. Chen Jinan smiled and pulled her up from the ground, then fetched the medicine for her.
“I’ve been drinking this for ages now,” Feng Lezhen frowned slightly, though she didn’t reject it.
In truth, it didn’t taste bad. Shen Suifeng had clearly added something to sweeten it—it was mildly sweet with no bitterness at all.
Chen Jinan watched as she drank it down in one go. Remembering Shen Suifeng’s reminder, he added, “Doctor Shen said, if Your Highness takes care of your health while still young, you’ll live a long life.”
“I’ve been taking care of my health for so long now,” Feng Lezhen sighed. “Lately I’ve had a rosy complexion and a hearty appetite. Even my last period was heavier than usual.”
Chen Jinan smiled. “That proves it’s working. Your Highness should drink more.”
Feng Lezhen gave him a side glance but said nothing.
With his task complete, Chen Jinan accompanied her back to her bedroom. Just as he said he would stand guard outside for the night and was about to leave, Feng Lezhen tugged at his sleeve.
“How’s your wound healing?” she asked.
“About fifty to sixty percent better,” Chen Jinan replied.
“Take off your clothes.” Knowing his tendency to report only the good, Feng Lezhen insisted on seeing for herself.
Chen Jinan hesitated, then obediently began undressing.
It was already late autumn. Though the lamps warmed the room a little, the chill still lingered. As his layers came off one by one and his body was exposed to the air, he couldn’t help shivering.
In the candlelight, Feng Lezhen’s gaze swept over him. When she saw the mottled marks still on his skin, her brows furrowed deeply. “Why hasn’t it healed yet?”
“Doctor Shen said the burns damaged all the skin on my body, so I have to shed it like a snake—slowly, layer by layer. Once it’s all gone, I’ll be fine.” Chen Jinan spoke with some embarrassment, trying to cover the ugly marks on his body—but with only two hands, he couldn’t cover everything.
Feng Lezhen said nothing. She reached out, trying to touch the dark, rough skin on Chen Jinan’s body that had yet to shed. But he instinctively took a step back.
“Don’t touch it, Your Highness. It’s dirty,” he said with difficulty.
Feng Lezhen looked up at him, then suddenly leaned down and kissed those scars.
That sudden act stirred a wave of quiet desire.
Chen Jinan’s body instantly tensed. The lines of his lower abdomen became even sharper and more defined. Feng Lezhen silently smiled, then sighed softly.
“Just keep taking care of yourself. You’ll get better eventually,” she said.
Chen Jinan replied with a quiet “yes” and hurried to put his clothes back on.
Feng Lezhen watched as he put on his inner robe. Just as he was about to reach for the rest of his garments, she suddenly said, “I’m not in a good mood tonight. Stay and keep me company.”
Chen Jinan paused mid-motion, startled. Then he slowly looked up.
“…Alright. As Your Highness commands,” he quickly responded, standing up straight, still holding a pitch-black outer robe in his hand.
The lights in the bedchamber were extinguished in less than half an hour. The tightly closed doors and windows showed no sign of opening again. Outside, Ah Ye stood watch quietly for a while. At last, she let out a breath of relief and ran off to find Fan Gonggong.
Fan Gonggong was just about to rest when a little maid knocked at his door. He quickly dressed and opened it. “What are you doing here in the middle of the night instead of sleeping?”
“Gonggong, how did you know that Chen Jinan would be the one to get Her Highness to listen?” Ah Ye’s eyes sparkled with curiosity. “If you think about it, whether it’s Lord Fu, who understands everything about Her Highness and the late emperor, or Doctor Shen, who could persuade her from a medical perspective—either of them should’ve been more persuasive than clumsy Chen Jinan. Why did you insist on sending him instead?”
“There’s no deep reason,” Fan Gonggong said, already sleepy. “Chen Jinan was simply the better fit.”
But Ah Ye refused to leave without an answer.
Fan Gonggong had no choice but to explain properly: “Lord Fu and Doctor Shen are both good men. Even Qi Shizi far away in Yunming, or that one named Wenge, are all fine people. But when it comes to matters related to the late emperor, only Chen Jinan can truly comfort Her Highness.”
“Why?” Ah Ye asked, confused.
Fan Gonggong didn’t know how to explain either. After a long pause, he said, “Maybe it’s because Lord Fu still bears a deep grudge, Doctor Shen cares for the people and values freedom more. Qi Shizi—well, his parents gave everything for him, so he can’t repay them with betrayal. Even Wenge, an assassin with nothing to his name, still gave up Her Highness for the sake of his principles. Just like the late emperor—he loved Her Highness dearly, cherished her like the apple of his eye—but she was never his first choice. If you ask those men to comfort Her Highness now, when she’s already heartbroken, it’ll only hurt more.”
“But Chen Jinan is different. What he values is Her Highness, and only Her Highness. Her joys are his joys, her sorrows his sorrows. Her likes are his likes, her dislikes are his dislikes. Without exception. That’s never changed. When he comes, it reminds Her Highness that even if the whole world doesn’t choose her—he still will.”
Fan Gonggong smiled softly. “If this old servant’s guess is correct, Lord Fu once held that same place in Her Highness’s heart. But…”
But one wrong step, and now they’re worlds apart.
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